The Farsider is an independent publication that is not
affiliated with the San Jose Police Benevolent
Assn. The SJPBA has allowed the Farsider to be included on its website solely for the convenience of
the retired San Jose Police community. The content of this newsletter does not represent or reflect
the views of the San Jose Police Benevolent Association's Board of Directors or its membership.
TWO DATES TO REMEMBER
A celebration of Manny’s life will be held this coming Sunday, Dec. 4th, at the San Jose POA, 1151 North Fourth Street. An open reception will be held from 2:00 to 5:00 p.m.
Jim’s friends will gather next Thursday, Dec. 8th, for a Celebration of Life at Paine’s Restaurant, 421 East St. in Hollister from 11 a.m. to 2 p.m.
A FINAL FAREWELL TO ROGER MALCOLM
Retiree Cynthia Johnson captured this short clip on Nov. 17th of Roger Malcolm's friends celebrating his life in a traditional Hawaiian farewell ceremony by spreading his ashes in the ocean. Click HERE to view it. (0:35)
MORE ON TOM KINNEY
Last week’s Farsider included a short item about the passing of retired Sgt. Tom Kinney, who until his death this past Sept. was the oldest living SJPD retiree. We asked if anyone had any additional information and/or a photo of Tom, and Ivan Comelli came through with the following two pics that he posted on his “Vintage San Jose Police” Facebook page, which is worth a visit for those interested in the history of the SJPD.
According to Ivan, this is an early 1950s photo of the San Jose Pep Band. Standing (L-R) are Dante Provasi, Tom Kinney, and Charley Schaefer. Kneeling (L-R) are Ernie Barozzi and (possibly) Mario Stefanini.
Another photo of Tom Kinney shows him standing on the far right. In the center is Ernie Barozzi, and the officer on the far left is unidentified.
NEW WEBSITE FOR THE CHAPLAINCY
The San Jose Police Chaplaincy has a new website that should be worth bookmarking. You can access it HERE.
Some City retirees who received pension benefits that exceeded a maximum amount set by the IRS may have dodged a bullet and will not have to give back the overpayment. The key word in that sentence is “may.” This story from Tuesday’s paper explains…
Sued Over $500K Retiree Pay ‘Mistake’
—Retirement group for employees paid 12 people amounts exceeding IRS limits and must recover the money—
Ramona Giwargis <firstname.lastname@example.org>
Mercury News — Nov. 29, 2016
SAN JOSE — The administrator of the city’s retirement fund for non-public safety employees overpaid a dozen retirees, some up to tens of thousands of dollars over the last two decades.
But instead of asking them for the money back, the board that oversees the fund is going after another source: the city of San Jose. City leaders, however, are fighting back, insisting taxpayers shouldn’t pick up the tab on the retirement system’s $500,000 “mistake.”
The legal battle is the latest dispute over pensions in San Jose, just weeks after voters approved a measure to settle costly legal troubles over Measure B, a 2012 ballot measure that trimmed employee retirement benefits.
The city’s nonpublic safety employees’ retirement group filed a lawsuit Nov. 17 demanding San Jose pay $882,007 for “overpayments” the system made to the dozen retirees, as well as interest.
Annual retirement benefits to public employees are subject to limits set by the Internal Revenue Service, but those amounts were exceeded for 12 employees over the last 20 years.
Records requested by this news organization show one retiree, Wayne Tanda, who oversaw the Department of Transportation, was paid a total of $216,405 above the IRS limits on top of his $133,151 annual retirement since he left the city in 2002 after 31 years.
“We were never overpaid. We made our contributions — this is money that we’ve earned,” Tanda said Monday.
“It wasn’t until 12 years after I retired they informed me that the fund they were using had a limit on it. It hit me like a ton of bricks. I couldn’t believe it. I thought they were kidding.”
Another retiree, Joseph Bass, who worked in Neighborhood Services, got $172,397 above the IRS cap in addition to his $135,099 annual retirement. A message left for Bass was not immediately returned. The remaining 10 retirees received from $417 to $22,000 in overpayments.
The incorrect payments were overlooked despite annual financial audits conducted by an outside firm, said Roberto Peña, the director of San Jose Retirement Services.
“It is our responsibility to monitor that. Clearly some of them fell through the cracks,” Peña said. “And we now have implemented new controls to make sure this doesn’t happen again.”
Under IRS law, trust funds are obligated to recover money paid in error along with interest.
The retirement board had the option of collecting the money from the 12 overpaid retirees. But the board instead voted unanimously to go after the plan sponsor — San Jose — for the money.
“The board felt this wasn’t a mistake of the members,” Peña said. “Quite honestly we made a mistake and didn’t have the right controls in place to make sure we catch every member that went over the limit.”
The limits set by the IRS require that employees who retire at age 55 aren’t paid more than $140,000 a year and those who retire at age 62 can’t receive more than $210,000 a year.
In its lawsuit, the Federated City Employees’ Retirement System, which represents 8,500 current and former city employees, estimated the overpayments totaled $500,000 and is demanding reimbursement from the city, plus more than $300,000 in interest.
Critics say other cities and counties have set up alternative funds to cover benefits that exceeded the IRS cap, but San Jose didn’t.
City Attorney Rick Doyle said Monday the overpayments are “mistakes of the plan” — not the city — and it’s not San Jose’s responsibility to pay it back, especially since the city already paid its portion of benefits to the 12 employees.
“The buck stops with them,” Doyle said of the retirement plan. “We’ve already paid this bill once and now they’re coming after the taxpayers to pay again for their mistake. We’re looking after the taxpayers — someone has to be, because the retirement board certainly doesn’t care about the taxpayer.”
Doyle added that the retirement board has insurance to cover errors like this. But the lawsuit claims that wasn’t an option because the insurance only covered claims against the system — not its own mistakes.
The lawsuit isn’t the only legal trouble brewing for San Jose. About 25 city employees whose benefits were cut to comply with the IRS limits — including 11 who were overpaid — are threatening to sue the city in a separate action. They want the city to create a separate fund to reinstate their full benefits.
“We want San Jose to live up to its promise,” said Robert Bezemek, an Oakland-based attorney representing the retirees. “They worked hard for a long time — 30 years or more — to earn these benefits. It’s not like San Jose can’t afford it. It’s a matter of fulfilling their promise.”
THE TRIALS AND TRIBULATIONS OF SAN JOSE AND THE SJPD
It’s been months since Mercury News columnist Scott Herald opined about anything dealing with the SJPD. That quiet time came to an end last Sunday with this column…
Video Misses the Big Picture
By Scott Herald — Columnist
Mercury News — Nov. 27, 2016
“When did shooting at cops become OK?’’ asks the controversial San Jose Police Officers’ Association video released for Thanksgiving. If you were looking for respite over your turkey and stuffing, it was enough to unsettle you. It wasn’t quite a family-friendly question.
The quick answer is that for the vast majority of us, shooting at cops is never OK. But you can’t understand the POA video — which in the end pushes a point of view — without fathoming the outrage of an officer on the receiving end of gunfire, even errant gunfire. The POA video was the somber and intimidating response to the protests that have erupted after a jumble of cellphone videos have shown cops killing young black men for questionable reasons. The video skirted the hashtag war — yes — but ended by saying that Blue Lives Matter.
As a huge First Amendment booster, I believe the cops have every right to assert their point of view. Those of us who have never put on a uniform or considered the need for a bulletproof vest cannot fully understand their sense of being under assault.
In some ways, though, that’s the problem with the video: <https://goo.gl/9d2uQd>. It’s designed to express outrage. It doesn’t really change anyone’s mind or bring anyone closer to understanding. The bad guys, sadly, are not going to be dissuaded by the video’s pledge to draw a line in the sand.
“Where is the outrage when police officers are targeted for murder?’’ asks the video. You could answer that by pointing to Dallas: After five officers were killed there in July, thousands turned out to mourn. President Barack Obama and former President George Bush spoke at the memorial.
When San Jose police Officer Michael Johnson was killed by a sniper on Senter Road in March 2015, Mayor Sam Liccardo rushed to the scene, calling it “San Jose’s darkest hour.’’ The mayor understood just what an outrage Johnson’s killing was.
The POA video, to be sure, was making a slightly different rhetorical point: Implicitly pointing to the protests on behalf of victims of police, it was asking why there was no equivalent response when a young shooter fired on two San Jose officers on Nov. 13. “Enough is enough,’’ said POA President Sgt. Paul Kelly.
The problem here is two-fold: First, there is no easy equivalence between the outrage fueling the Black Lives Matter movement and the quick decision by an alleged gang member to shoot at cops near Independence High School. The political lines here are far muddier than the video would suggest.
Second, the pledge to “draw a line in the sand,’’ while understandable, suggests a brittleness that does not serve cops well. It offers the haters of police a chance to vilify the men and women on a beat.
Let me offer a different scenario, this time from Dallas: In the days after the killing of five officers in July, two protests clashed near Dallas’ NorthPark Center. One was sponsored by the “Black Lives Matter’’ movement. The second was a counter-protest of residents waving American and Texas flags.
After the temperatures had cooled, the two sides joined to offer a prayer for their common plight. The peace was brokered by Sgt. Jeff Hall, a 27-year Dallas police veteran who told reporters that he had never seen protests come together like that.
The sergeant deserves our thanks. In that one act, he accomplished far more than a stern video could ever hope to do.
• • • • •
Another gun buyback with no questions asked is hoping to convince citizens to turn in their firearms for Target gift cards…
Offer Gift Cards for Guns, No Questions
—This year’s buyback will be at Great Oaks Parkway substation—
By Robert Salonga <email@example.com>
Mercury News — Nov. 29, 2016
SAN JOSE — Armed with Target gift cards, the San Jose Police Department and other Santa Clara County agencies hope to take hundreds of unwanted firearms off the street with a gun buyback event set for Saturday. This year, the buyback will be held at the SJPD substation on Great Oaks Parkway in South San Jose. It had previously been held at the PAL Stadium grounds off Interstate 680.
Authorities are offering $100 gift cards for handguns, rifles and shotguns and $200 cards for what police describe as “assault weapons.”
The San Jose Police Department’s gun-
gift card exchange will occur with no
collection of personal information.
Buyback organizers say the event is driven by their observations that many city and county residents have guns that they no longer use or maintain, just sitting in their homes in storage or collecting dust.
“The majority of people who come to these things have been legitimate citizens really concerned about having a firearm that they don’t need,” SJPD Capt. Ed Schroder said. “They need a mechanism to get rid of guns in a safe manner.”
Schroder also added that to encourage submissions, the gun-gift card exchange will occur with no collection of personal information.
“This is anonymous,” he said. “No questions asked.”
In the event that a firearm is later determined to be stolen, police will try to return the weapon to its rightful owner. The rest will be destroyed.
Johnny Gogo, a community-focused prosecutor for the District Attorney’s Office who has helped organize previous buybacks, revived the theme of stolen weapons in touting the event’s crime prevention effect.
“None of these (collected) firearms will ever be used in any intentional or unintentional shooting, or stolen in home burglaries and used in any crimes,” Gogo said.
That particularly resonates for Schroder, who alluded to a spike in police officer deaths across the country over last year. “We are concerned about these guns being used against our officers,” Schroder said. “We need to get these off the streets.” Gogo said that since 2013, five buyback events held by SJPD and the Sheriff’s Office have collected 2,500 firearms. Those interested in surrendering a firearm for the buyback are advised to transport them unloaded in the trunk of a car; no walk-up contributions will be accepted. Any weapons must be functional to be eligible for a gift card, and cards may be limited for people with multiple weapons — that is, cards won’t necessarily be given on a one-to-one gun basis to accommodate as wide a number of contributors as possible.
The gift cards are paid for by asset-forfeiture funds from the District Attorney’s Office and SJPD, as well as donations collected by the San Jose Police Foundation.
Other event sponsors include the offices of San Jose City Councilman Ash Kalra, Santa Clara County Supervisor Mike Wasserman and Assemblyman Mark Stone, as well as First 5 Santa Clara County and The Health Trust.
Lou Balesteri is trying to make contact with Gil Gonzales but is having no luck with Gil’s listed email address of <firstname.lastname@example.org>. Anyone who is in contact with Gil is requested to get in touch with Lou at <email@example.com>.
• • • • •
Jim Baggott was a good man and cop. We hired him to build all the cabinets for our kitchen renovation in Willow Glen in ’95. He was a true craftsman and artist. Ron "Rudy" Rosso was the general contractor at the time, and he too did an exceptional job.
Regarding the SJS riot squad. It looks like Rich Couser to me with Gary L. Thompson to the left in the photo. I was also present that day somewhere in the formation. I think it was Bruce Moore and Don Ewing who were the two detectives that arrested one of the Hells Angels and came around the corner at 5th and San Fernando with a howling mob in close pursuit. It was one of those occasions where most of us felt that if Ray Blackmore had given the OK, things would have gone differently in San Jose over the next few tumultuous years. We were probably wrong about that, but we did have some retribution at 5th and Williams some time later. Or so I’m told.
Mike (Thompson) <firstname.lastname@example.org>
• • • • •
The officer listed as unknown in the 1967 Academy photo that was in the Nov. 17th Farsider was Scott Edmonson.
He later became the first Air One officer. On his first night aloft he called in a Code 20 for me when I was surrounded by a hostile crowd. With the help of a flat sap I stayed on my feet until the troops arrived. Well done, Scotty! (I still have the flat sap; comes in handy during encounters with some morons blathering about police brutality.)
Larry “Nails” Farnsworth <email@example.com>
• • • • •
Last week you published a video of a Christmas ad featuring Buster the Boxer. If you don’t remember it, have a look before you play the second clip which is a parody featuring Hillary, Barack and Michelle.
Talking Points <firstname.lastname@example.org>
OK, TP, I think I’ve got it. HERE is the Buster Christmas ad that runs for only a couple of minutes. (2:10)
And HERE is the even shorter parody featuring Hillary with a guest appearance by Barack and Michelle. (0:38)
• • • • •
I was connected to Mr. Galloway through a mutual friend. He is researching the use of steroids by public safety officials. We had a nice discussion regarding my experience with the issues involved. Although I am the fountain of wisdom on all matters, I did humbly suggest that others might have different views than mine.
I promised Mr. Galloway I would send his contact information to my brothers who may have some information to share on the subject. If you would like to contribute to his research please contact him directly. His contact information is listed below.
Harry (Mullins) <email@example.com>
Executive & Research Director
New Leaf Treatment Center
251 Lafayette Circle, Suite 150, Lafayette, CA 94549
• • • • •
I sure do appreciate you keeping me up on things through the Farsider. Regarding the photos that Harry Mullins sent in, Jim is the second to the left of Glenn Terry (or whoever that is in the suicide vest).
Thanks to you and Harry for the memories.
Margo (Hober) <firstname.lastname@example.org>
So good to hear from you Margo. Hope you are doing well. I know your son is.
(For the few readers who are unaware, Margo is the widow of the late Sgt. Jim Hober who passed away 16 years ago. She is also the proud mother of SJPD retiree Dave Hober who is now the Police Chief of the Monterey PD.)
Attention retirees. If you have had issues in the past or are currently experiencing issues with either Athens or Mitchell for any worker's comp claims, please contact Ray Storms, VP of Fire at 510-507-1136. NBC is doing a follow-up story on and may want to talk to you. You can view their original story HERE.
SPECIAL MESSAGE FOR THE RESERVES, PAST AND PRESENT
The SJPD Reserves are celebrating the anniversary of their formation and 75 years of dedicated service to the City and its residents on January 28th 2017. First formed on December 8, 1941 Hence the motto: “Established in War, Serving in Peace.” Reserves have always provided thousands of hours of volunteer service annually and are responsible these days for much of the Community Policing activity at the department.
Since many of our retirees have also been Reserves either at the beginning or end of their careers, would you consider publishing this information for the Farsider readers? The price is right, FREE dinner, entertainment, (and war stories at no extra charge) for the first 100 attendees (and their guest) who respond to the email address to reserve (sic) a spot and specify their preferred entrée! <email@example.com>
For those who wish to stay overnight there is also a low room rate available at the hotel too. We are also looking to add to our photo display any pictures of Reserves in action. These can be sent either via email to <firstname.lastname@example.org> or I'm happy to collect, scan and safely return any images some might have available.
Many thanks for yours and Leroy's excellent work in keeping us all informed and to to date with the happenings at the PD.
Jim McMahon <email@example.com>
RETIREES’ ASSOCIATION’S ANNUAL CHRISTMAS LUNCHEON INVITATION
Association of Retired San Jose Police Officers and Firefighters
Christmas Luncheon 2016
San Jose P.O.A. Hall
1151 N.4th St.
Thursday, Dec. 8th
Doors open at 11 a.m.
Lunch will be served from 12:00 to 1:30 p.m.
Please bring an unwrapped gift for a child.
Dress is Business Casual
Cost: Free for Everyone
If you plan to attend, we need you to sign up on-line as soon as possible by clicking HERE.
THIS SHOULD BE A NATIONAL RECORD FOR COPS WHO LEFT AND BECAME A CHIEF
There were 32 names on this list when we ran it in last week’s Farsider. Based on the emails we received from readers this week, the list is now comprised of 45 former SJPD cops who landed a Chief’s job after leaving the Dept.
• Andy Galea — Los Altos, CA
• Bill Clark — Newport, WA
• Bill Lansdowne — Richmond, CA; San Diego, CA
• Bob Allen — Capitola, CA
• Bob Bradshaw — Reno, NV; Concord CA; Nevada Highway Patrol
• Brian Ferrante — Sand City, CA
• Bud Bye — San Jose-Evergreen Community College District Police
• Chris Ebert — Marion, IA
• Dan Ortega — Salinas, CA
• Dave Hober — Monterey, CA
• Dave Honda — Watsonville
• Diane Urban — Hayward, CA
• Eric Sills — Greenfield, CA; Soledad, CA
• Gary Leonard — Grand Junction, CO; Alexandria, VA; Sandy City, UT; Greenfield, CA; West Sacramento, CA
• Gus Kettman — Palm Springs, CA
• Jay Propst — Boulder, CO
• Jerry Bowers — Piedmont, CA
• Jerry Smith — Chief of Investigators, San Benito County D.A.’s Office
• JR "Junior" Gamez — Redwood City, CA
• Ken Tanaka — West Valley/Mission College District Police
• Larry Esquivel — Tracy, CA
• Lee Brown — Multnomah Co., OR; Atlanta, GA; Houston, TX; New York City, NY
• Lou Cobarruviaz — Redwood City, CA
• Manny Martinez — Daly City, CA
• Mark Anderson — Lynden, WA
• Martin Monica — Parlier, CA
• Mike Maehler — Longmont, CO; Concord, CA; Mountain View, CA; Sunnyvale, CA
• Pat Dwyer — Sunnyvale, CA; Palo Alto, CA; Hayward, CA
• Pete Decena — San Jose State University Police
• Pete Oliver — Chief of Investigators, Santa Clara County D.A.’s Office
• Phan Ngo — Sunnyvale DPS, CA
• Rich Couser — Contra Costa Community College District Police
• Rich Gummow — Juneau, AK
• Richard Cadenasso — Elk Grove Unified School District Police
• Richard Calderon — Gustine, CA
• Rikki Goede — Piedmont, CA
• Ruben Chavez — Livingston, CA
• Russ Russell — San Juan Bautista, CA; Coalinga, CA; Parlier, CA
• Scott Seaman — Los Gatos, CA
• Tom Brewer — Chief of Investigators, Santa Clara County D.A.’s Office
• Tom Frazier — Baltimore, MD
• Tom Navin — Capitol Police Dept., NV
• Tommy Morales — Evergreen College District Police
• Tuck Younis — Los Altos, CA
• Walt Tibbett — Alameda, CA and Fairfield, CA
HOW MANY OF US COULD MAKE IT THROUGH THE ACADEMY TODAY?
It’s been five years since this series of videos was posted on YouTube for those who wanted to see what it took to become a San Jose cop. But all the Academy did was qualify a recruit to test his or her metal in the FTO Program. We think you will agree that those of us who were appointed in the ’60s and ’70s had it far easier than these wannabe cops.
into the Blue Part 1 — Welcome
to the SJPD
Step into the Blue Part 2 — Home on the Range
Step into the Blue Part 3 — Oooh dark thirty in the morning
Step into the Blue Part 4 — What did she say?
Step into the Blue Part 5 — Well, that’s not supposed to happen
Step into the Blue Part 6 — It’s Mid Terms
Step into the Blue Part 7 — Father Time
Step into the Blue Part 8 — Now we are cooking with gas
Step into the Blue Part 09 — He ain’t heavy…ah, yes he is!
Step into the Blue Part 10 — Graduation
AVAILABLE FOR PRE-ORDER ON AMAZON
STORIES OF THE WEEK
Submitted by Doug Bergtholdt
I never really liked the term "Old Person,” but this makes me feel better about it. And if you aren't one, I bet you know one!
I'm passing this on because I did not want to be the only old person receiving it. Actually, it's not a bad thing to be called an Old Person…
Old People are easy to spot at sporting events; during the playing of the National Anthem, Old People remove their caps and stand at attention and sing without embarrassment. They know the words and believe in them.
Old People remember World War II, Pearl Harbor, Guadalcanal , Normandy and Hitler. They remember the Atomic Age, the Korean War, The Cold War, the Jet Age and the Moon Landing. They remember the 50 plus Peace keeping Missions from 1945 to 2005, not to mention Vietnam. If you bump into an Old Person on the sidewalk, he will apologize. If you pass an Old Person on the street, he will nod or tip his cap to a lady.
Old People trust strangers and are courtly to women.
Old People hold the door for the next person and always, when walking, make certain the lady is on the inside for protection.
Old People get embarrassed if someone curses in front of women and children, and they don't like any filth or dirty language on TV or in movies.
Old People have moral courage and personal integrity. They seldom brag unless it's about their children or grandchildren.
Old People remove their hats while eating in a restaurant in respect for the ladies and guests.
Old People know our great country is protected, not by politicians, but by the young men and women in the military serving their country.
This country needs Old People with their work ethic, sense of responsibility, pride in their country and decent values.
We need them now more than ever.
Thank God for Old People.
• • • • •
Arthur is 90 years old. He's played golf every day since his retirement 25 years ago. One day he arrives home looking downcast.
"That's it," he tells his wife, "I'm giving up golf. My eyesight has gotten so bad, once I've hit the ball I can't see where it went."
His wife sympathizes. As they sit down she says, "Why don't you take my brother with you and give it one more try?"
"That's no good," sighs Arthur. "Your brother is a hundred and three years old. He can't help."
"He may be a hundred and three," says the wife, "but his eyesight is perfect."
So the next day Arthur heads off to the golf course with his brother-in-law in tow.
He tees up, takes an almighty swing and squints down the fairway. He turns to the brother-in-law, "Did you see the ball?"
"Of course I did," says the brother-in-law, "I have perfect eyesight."
"Where did it go?" asks Arthur.
"I don't remember."
• • • • •
Bubba, Hank and Billy-Joe were playing golf one day. After they teed off on the 18th hole, Billy-Joe went hunting for his golf ball, slipped, fell into deep hole and was killed instantly. As the ambulance took his body away, Hank said, "Well, damn, someone should go and tell his wife."
Bubba said, "I'm pretty good at that sensitive stuff, I'll do it."
Two hours later he came back carrying a case of Budweiser.
Hank said, "Where did you get the beer?"
"Billy-Joe's wife gave it to me," Bubba replied.
"That's unbelievable. You told Billy-Joe's wife that her husband was dead and she gave you a case of beer?"
"Well, not exactly," Bubba said. "When she answered the door, I said to her, 'You must be Billy-Joe's widow.' "
She said, "You must be mistaken. I'm not a widow."
Then I said, "I'll bet you a case of Budweiser you are."
• • • • •
A Heart Warming Christmas Story
Received from Joe Devane
One afternoon a week before Christmas, a lawyer was riding in his limousine when he saw two men along the roadside eating grass. Being in the holiday spirit, he ordered his driver to stop and he got out to investigate.
He asked one man, "Why are you eating grass?"
"We don't have any money for food," the poor man replied. "We have to eat grass."
"Well, then, you can come with me to my house and I'll feed you," the lawyer said.
"But sir, I have a wife and two children with me. They are over there eating grass under that tree."
"Bring them along," the lawyer replied.
Turning to the second poor man he stated, "You may come with us, also."
The other man, in a pitiful voice, said, "But sir, I also have a wife and six children with me!"
"Bring them all as well," the lawyer answered.
They all entered the car, which was no easy task, even for a car as large as the limousine.
Once under way, one of the poor fellows turned to the lawyer and said, "Sir, you are too kind. Thank you for taking all of us with you."
The lawyer replied, "Glad to do it. You'll really love my place. The grass is almost a foot high."
~ ~ ~
Come on, did you really think there was such a thing as a heart-warming lawyer story? Even at Christmas? Look at Congress — over 300 Lawyers!
TO MY HOLLYWOOD COUNTERPARTS…
THE BEST OF THE LATE NITE JOKES
Only two shows since last Thursday were not repeats due to Thanksgiving
Nov. 28: Today is cyber Monday, which means tomorrow is "Russia has your credit card info Tuesday."
Experts are warning shoppers to check the spelling of websites on cyber Monday because there are lookalike sites that try to scam you with a slight misspelling of a store's name. Yep, they said if you want more info on this, just look it up on Goggle.
Trump went on Twitter yesterday to claim that he actually won the popular vote if you deduct the millions of illegal voters and that any recount will change nothing. Speaking of nothing changing, Trump won and still says the election was rigged.
The secret service protecting Donald Trump might have to rent two floors of Trump Tower, forcing taxpayers to pay $3 million in rent back to Trump's company. Trump said that is absolutely not true, and that the rent is $4 million.
The secret service protecting Donald Trump might have to rent two floors of trump tower, forcing taxpayers to pay $3 million in rent back to trump's company. Trump said that is absolutely not true and the rent is $4 million.
Nov. 28: Trump was seen wearing a hat that says "45" on the side, signifying that he will be the 45th president. Or the total number of days before he quits being president. He's like, "It's been fun — it's been a fun month and a half. You take it from here, Pence."
Donald Trump said he will not try and send Hillary Clinton to jail. After hearing this, Bill Clinton said, "Hey, you promised."
Breakfast Club star Anthony Michael Hall is facing seven years in prison for fighting his neighbor. However, his lawyer is trying to plea bargain that down to just serving detention with Molly Ringwald, Emilio Estevez, and Judd Nelson.
Donald Trump is giving key positions in his cabinet to people who were loyal to him early on. So congratulations, Defense Secretary Scott Baio!
Yesterday, Donald Trump tweeted that millions of people voted illegally on Election Day. Then someone told Trump it’s not illegal for women to vote.
IS CALIFORNIA READY TO BECOME THE 51st STATE?
WEEKLY SNOPES URBAN LEGEND UPDATE
Click HERE for the most current update.
• • • • •
Dave Scannell suggested we kick off the Christmas season with THIS rendition of “Little Drummer Boy” by Pentatonic. Having heard the group before, we said "Why not?" (4:13)
• • • • •
Some will argue that the cliché “Death by a thousand cuts” could apply to our country, and there are dozens of videos on YouTube that support that argument. Fair or not, this is one of them. It’s about Dearborn, Michigan, which has one of the largest — if not THE largest — Muslim communities in the country. THIS video was posted a few weeks ago. (5:53)
• • • • •
The headline in this New York Post will give you a clue as to the mindset of the California Democrats in the House and why they CHOSE to help return Nancy Pelosi as the House Minority Leader.
• • • • •
I became a fan of Postmodern Jukebox (PMJ) several weeks ago when I ran a video of the group singing its rendition of “All About That Bass” — and I have been enjoying several of their other performances ever since. THIS one with “Andrew Sisters” in the title caught my eye. While watching it, however, I couldn’t understand why the gal in red on the far right who is sitting down seemed to be pouting until…well, see for yourself. (3:17)
Says Dirk Parsons, “Remember Postmodern Jukebox's version of "All About That Bass?" This song was a hit by Lady Gaga, but I like THIS version better. You might say...it's a kick!” (4:35)
For those of you who missed seeing PMJ’s version of “All About That Bass” (my personal favorite) — or would like to see it again — clicking HERE will put you in the front row. (4:14)
• • • • •
To the surprise of virtually everyone who worked with Dean Janavice, he has found a cause he truly believes in and has asked our help in recruiting some of you to get involved with “Millennial International.” Dean’s largess in sponsoring a millennial for this worthy cause has freed him from the moniker “Mean Dean," which hung around his neck like an albatross during much of his police career. Please watch THIS video sent in by just plain ol’ Dean and let your conscience be your guide as to whether you want to donate a few bucks a month to help out a millennial. (4:07)
• • • • •
Want an early look at a major league all-star your kids and grandkids will be cheering on in 15 years? Go for it by clicking HERE. (0:57)
• • • • •
The pooch in the pic below was given the name of “Houdini” by the Hope for Paws rescue crew. It’s almost as if he was starring in a remake of the movie “Catch Me If You Can.” Click HERE if you want to see another rescue video that has a happy ending. (9:53)
This Hope for Paws rescue video about an injured Mastiff may call for a Kleenex or two if you are a dog lover, but it too has a happy ending — a VERY happy ending. (10:25)
• • • • •
Having trouble with your golf swing? Lumpy says you should try the technique shown in THIS short clip. He says it hasn't hurt his handicap that that it probably won't hurt yours. (0:28)
• • • • •
• • • • •
Joe Devane wants to know what’s with this nonsense about fake news reports. If they actually exist, he’s convinced it’s a distraction perpetrated by the right. Or the left. Or both. Or neither. Frankly, he doesn’t know WHAT the hell to think! (2:34)
• • • • •
Talk about upcycling! After cutting down a tree, a homeowner was stuck with a big, ugly stump in his front yard. Most people would be quick to hire someone with heavy machinery to remove the stump, but this homeowner called a tree artist with a chainsaw instead. Take a few minutes and WATCH what he does with his power tools and an airbrush. (2:21)
• • • • •
According to Alice Murphy, the wife of a retiree who sits around the house all day long says, “Tony, you could do something useful like vacuum the house once a week.” He gives it a moment’s thought and says, “Sure, why not? Where’s the vacuum?”
A half-hour later, when Tony comes into the kitchen to get some coffee, his wife says, “I didn’t hear the vacuum running. I thought you were going to do the vacuuming?"
Exasperated, Tony says, “The stupid thing is broken. It won’t start. We need to buy a new one.”
“Really?” says the wife. “Show me, it worked fine the last time I used it.” So Tony said “Follow me and I'll show you the problem.” (Click HERE)
• • • • •
If you have not been exposed to Holographic Projection Technology before, you should have a look at it by clicking HERE. It’s pretty amazing stuff as you can see when a humpback whale surprises these students assembled in the school gymnasium. Stick with it after the first breech and you can see it again in slo-mo. (1:19)
• • • • •
This sport called Thundercat Racing looks like a fun and exciting way to spend an afternoon. And if I ever run across such an event, I’m going to park my not-so-svelte butt on a big towel and WATCH it from the beach. (3:09)
• • • • •
Alice Murphy had a radio that made it possible for her to monitor and record the captain’s announcement when Trump’s 757 recently departed LAX and headed north. Have a listen. (0:38)
• • • • •
All kidding about Trump’s Boeing 757 aside, I found this documentary about Trump and his flying machine very interesting. It chronicles the events leading up to Trump’s trip from JFK to his golf course in Aberdeen, Scotland, then to London for a speech and back to New York. Among other things, it shows how anal The Donald is about cleanliness. He comes across as someone who is likely to freak out if he finds so much as a smudge inside his golden airplane. And that’s not hyperbole; there is so much gold in the cabin, according to this documentary, that if melted down it could gold-plate a locomotive. If you are interested in aviation and/or Trump, I highly recommend THIS documentary. (45:52)
• • • • •
Thank you for flying Bill & Leroy's No Frills Airline!
Pic of the Week
The Perfect Holiday Brunch...
THE FARSIDER SUBSCRIPTION ROSTER as of 12/1/16
Additions and changes since the last published update (alphabetical by last name):
To receive the email address of anyone on the list -- or to receive the roster with all of the email addresses -- send your request to <firstname.lastname@example.org>.
Abram, Fred & Connie
Allen, Chaplain Bryan
Alvarez, Pat (Campbell)
Babineau, Dave & Cheryl
Bray, Mary Ellen
Bridgen, Betty Ruth
Brown Jr., Bill
Burroughs, (Bronson) Utta
Carr Jr., John
Carrillo, Jaci Cordes
Clark, Bill (the one who stayed)
Embry (Howsmon), Eva
Foulkes [Duchon], Louise
Gonzalez, D. (formerly D. Avila)
Guido, Jr., Jim
Guido, Sr. Jim
Hare, Caren (Carlisle)
Harnish, Mary (Craven)
Horton, Debbie (McIntyre)
Howsmon, (Jr.) Frank
Howsmon (Sr.), Frank
Hunter, Dick (via daughter Kim Mindling)
Inami, Steve & Francine
Johnson, Tom & Fran
Klein, Lou Anna
Leonard (Lintern), Lynda
Muldrow, Mark "Mo"
O'Carroll, Diane (Azzarello)
Perry (Cervantez), Martha
Rappe (Ryman), Bonnie
Reyes (Buell), Cindy
Richter, Darrell & Annette
Schenini (Alvarez), Joanne
Taves, Phil & Paula
Terry, Glenn & Maggie
Vallecilla, Ernie & Peggy
Van Dyck, Lois
Williams [Durham], Lanette
Windisch Jr., Steve