Bill Mattos, Editor and Publisher
Leroy Pyle, Webmaster
The Farsider is an independent publication that is not
affiliated with the San Jose Police Benevolent
Assn. The SJPBA has allowed the Farsider to be included on its web site solely
for the convenience
of the retired San Jose Police community. The content of this newsletter does
not represent or reflect
the views of the San Jose Police Benevolent Association's Board of Directors or
RETIRED CHAPLAIN DAVE BRIDGEN'S STATUS
We spoke with Betty Ruth Bridgen last night and received
the following news about her husband and the procedures
he is going through for the Parkinson’s disease.
Dave got through the CT Scan and Fiducial Placement of
the target markers OK on Tuesday. The original plan
called for him to remain at Stanford overnight, then
return home for a couple of days of rest yesterday
before returning to Stanford tomorrow (Fri.) for the
installation of the Internal Pulse Generator. But it was
determined that Dave was too weak from the procedure and
the Parkinson’s to go home yesterday. He will shortly be
moved to a rehab facility closer to home, possibly Good
Sam or Mission Oaks. Installation of the Pulse Generator
has therefore been delayed until Dave regains some of
his strength. After that procedure is accomplished, Dave
will return to Stanford about a week-and-a-half later
for the removal of the staples.
Betty Ruth said that the projected date of Sept. 4th to
activate (turn on) the generator is still on schedule.
Prayers are still needed for a successful solution that
will allow Dave to lead as normal a life as possible.
With everything he has done for us over the past few
decades, we know that many of you will want to send a
get-well card to his residence. If you send a request to
<email@example.com> we will provide you with Dave’s
home address. This would be far more effective than an
e-card since Dave will not be spending any time
receiving and/or sending emails in the foreseeable
HAPPY 90th ROY…
As Ivano Franco Comelli pointed out on his “Vintage San
Jose Police” Facebook page, Roy Sanfilippo celebrated
his 90th birthday on Tuesday of this week. His email
<Royssan@pacbell.net> should you wish to send him a
belated email greeting card. Our hearty congratulations,
Craig Shuey pointed us to this July 31st Mercury News
Internal Affairs item available only on the paper’s
website (not in the paper’s hard copy). It should be
worth a read to everyone who was impacted by Measure B.
Safety Unions to City Council: Implement Measure B
News — Internal Affairs
on July 31, 2015 by rgiwargis
ago San Jose city officials announced with much fanfare
a compromise to settle Measure B litigation with police
and fire unions. There were press conferences brimming
with handshakes and lots of pats on the back.
Then there was silence.
Once the dust settled, the real question emerged: How to
replace the voter-approved Measure B — which scaled back
employee pensions and spurred multiple lawsuits from
labor unions — with the new settlement deal reached by
the city and its public safety unions.
San Jose has a few options: invalidate the controversial
measure through a legal action called “quo warranto,”
put the settlement deal’s framework out to voters in
2016 or a less-clear approach of adopting changes now
“subject to” approval by voters next year.
But police and fire union leaders say implementing the
changes can’t wait until 2016. On Friday, they sent a
strong letter to Mayor Sam Liccardo and the City
Council, urging them to take the first action.
“The pension settlement framework means little if we do
not implement it as soon as possible and provide former
San Jose police officers a reason to come back home and
current officers a reason to stay, let’s finish the job
now,” said Paul Kelly, president of the San Jose Police
Union officials say the “quo warranto” process — which
means a Superior Court judge will invalidate Measure B,
allowing the city to replace it with the settlement — is
the quickest way to drop the lawsuits, start capturing
retirement savings and stabilize a police force
struggling to keep officers.
Liccardo has publicly expressed concerns with the
process, saying he’s worried San Jose will get sued by
citizens who voted for Measure B. City Attorney Rick
Doyle hasn’t recommended which option the city should
Gregg Adam, the POA’s attorney, said the quo warranto
process worked in Seal Beach in Orange County and other
cities facing a similar dilemma — overturning a
voter-approved initiative. But the problem, Adam said,
is San Jose would have to admit it’s wrong.
The city’s firefighters union in 2012 filed charges
through the Public Employment Relations Board against
San Jose, saying city officials did not “meet and confer
in good faith” before putting Measure B on the ballot.
The board agreed (the city is appealing the decision),
but doesn’t have the jurisdiction to strike down a
ballot measure — only a judge can.
That’s where the quo warranto comes in, Adam said. If
the city agrees, the groups would collectively go to a
Superior Court judge and ask for Measure B to be
invalidated, using the PERB ruling as a backbone. “But
by doing this, you’re conceding that the city made a
mistake,” he said.
HERE if you want to read the letter from Police &
• • • • •
This Mercury News I.A. item 'did' make it into print in
last Sunday’s paper…
for Both Sides on Pension Reform Measure
News — Aug. 2, 2015
California’s nonpartisan Legislative Analyst’s Office
last week released its review of the public pension
reform initiative proposed by former San Jose Mayor
Chuck Reed and former San Diego City Councilman Carl
DeMaio— and what that review says seems to depend on
your point of view.
The 11-page document ends with a summary predicting
“significant effects — savings and costs — on state and
local governments relating to compensation for
governmental employees. The magnitude and timing of
these effects would depend heavily on future decisions
made by voters, governmental employers, and the courts.”
Opponents were hot out of the gate with a statement
noting that the LAO found there’s “significant
uncertainty as to the magnitude, timing, and direction
of the fiscal effects of this measure and its effects on
current and future governmental employees’
“This measure is a Trojan horse that will undermine the
retirement security of millions of California families
with unknown costs to taxpayers under the guise of
giving them more power,” Dave Low, chairman of
Californians for Retirement Security, said in Tuesday’s
But DeMaio and Reed followed up with a statement saying
the LAO had confirmed “that the mandatory requirements
of the measure would produce ‘significant savings.’ Even
better, in addition to what is specifically mandated by
the measure, the LAO confirmed that voters would have
new powers to add to the savings.”
“Government union bosses are desperate to protect their
gravy train at taxpayers’ expense. That’s why they are
spinning a web of lies about the measure,” Reed and
• • • • •
Then there was this article that appeared in the SacBee
on Tuesday of this week…
Pensions, Contracts on August Agenda
Sacramento Bee — Aug. 4, 2015
thermometer flirts with triple digits. The Legislature
is in Week 3 of a month-long recess. Fewer luxury cars
are parked around the Capitol, signaling that lobbyists
are on hiatus, too.
So during this regularly scheduled break, let’s look at
two stories California state workers should watch in
Pensions: Attorney General Kamala Harris has until Aug.
11 to issue the official title and summary language for
a ballot proposal on public pensions. Former San Jose
Mayor Chuck Reed, a Democrat, and former Republican San
Diego Councilman Carl DeMaio are behind it.
Both backed successful local pension-change ballot
measures in their respective cities in 2012 and figure
they can bring that mojo to a statewide proposal in
2016. Their plan would, among other things, require that
voters authorize future public pension benefit
increases. Beginning in 2019, new employees would not go
into a traditional pension plan without voters’ OK.
Harris, who is running for U.S. Senate, must give the
1,200-word proposal a title and summary of no more than
100 words for use on petition materials.
Based on fights over the attorney general’s
interpretation of previous pension measures, don’t be
surprised if the proponents claim that Harris used
poll-tested poison-pill language to misrepresent their
plan and spin it against voters’ biases.
If that happens, Reed and DeMaio have three options:
Fight the wording in court (Reed tried that with another
pension measure and lost), start signature collection
(but who would throw money into near-certain loser?) or
submit a rewritten proposal crafted to counter Harris’
The proposal’s proponents filed their measure early
enough to allow for that third option without running
afoul of deadlines that will loom late this year. So
look for a revised proposal this fall.
Contracts: Labor pacts covering state craft and
maintenance workers, correctional officers, scientists
and engineers expired around the June 30 end of the
fiscal year and their unions are now bargaining for new
agreements. A fifth union representing firefighters is
still under contract, but has reopened talks over pay.
The negotiations with Gov. Jerry Brown’s administration
appear to have bogged down over salaries and retiree
health benefits. The governor has offered modest raises,
but also wants employees to contribute to retiree
medical coverage, something most don’t do now.
Negotiations have to wrap up by early September or
lawmakers, who must approve any labor deals, will be on
recess (again) until January. The unions don’t want bad
contracts, but they don’t want talks to drag out,
Watch for what Brown negotiates with the 30,000-member
correctional officers union, which will send a clear
message to the smaller groups now and set the stage for
talks with other state-employee unions next year. Read
First, please withhold my name and email address if you
include this message as I don’t want to go down on
record as being a meanie. If you can’t, please ignore
the rest of this.
Second, I totally agree with the letter from Talking
Points about the excessive advertising by the various
charities asking for a $19 a month donation. I find the
repeated ads so irritating with the same crying women,
handicapped children and homeless cats and dogs that
none of them are included in the three charities I
donate to on a regular basis.
But Talking Points missed one that makes me want to put
a shotgun round into my radio every time I hear it. I’m
talking about that Cars for Kids ad that is all over KGO
radio and other stations. Lately, it has even invaded TV
with kids playing that damn jingle. I did a Google
search on the so-called charity and found a news report
that investigated the organization. What it said didn’t
surprise me. (I’ll attach the link below.)
Again, please disregard this email if you can’t withhold
(Name Withheld by Request)
I agree with this reader. When I’m in my car listening
to Ronn Owens on KGO and I hear that jingle start, I
immediately switch over to KCBS or another station.
While I have never considered ruining the dashboard of
my car with a round from my Remington 870, I might
consider doing so now that I have seen the video that
accompanied the reader’s email. It is an investigative
news report from the NBC affiliate in New York City and
can be viewed by clicking
HERE (the video may take a few moments to load).
This is the 30-second ad that Kars for Kids is running
on TV. Do not click
HERE unless you want to find yourself humming that
damn jingle for the rest of the day.
• • • • •
Tom McCready wrote to say that if you look closely at
this advertisement by the
DENTIST that took out Cecil the Lion, you will find
clues about his hobby. That got us to wondering if the
hunter might be Lumpy’s out-of-town dentist? (1:40)
• • • • •
And then there was this from a guy (presumably a guy)
who is becoming a regular staple for the Mail Call
You said in the (last week’s) Farsider that
controversial views are welcome for your mail column.
Well, I’m going to see if you meant it by saying that I
have had about as much of Cecil the Lion as I can
handle. Here is an alternate perspective on the lion's
Lion was no choirboy. Photos have surfaced of him in the
act of killing and eating Gary the Gazelle, a favorite
of both locals and visitors at Zimbabwe’s Hwange
National Park, where he delighted onlookers with his
trademark leap while clicking his heels (no small feat,
pardon the pun). Gary was 12 years old and leaves behind
his beloved wife, Greta Gazelle, and their 8 offspring,
whose names don’t translate to English.
Gary’s long-time friend, Zeke the Zebra said, “A lot of
people have been crying over Cecil lately, but let me
tell you, I’ve lost a lot of friends and family members
to him. He was a real animal, and I won’t be crying no
tears over his demise.”
If TP's missive doesn't spark some controversy and/or
hate mail, nothing will. C'est la vie.
AUGUST “VANGUARD” NOW ON-LINE
HERE to download it to your desktop, then
double-click the icon to open it if it doesn’t open
LATEST RETIREES’ ASSN. NEWSLETTER ALSO AVAILABLE
HERE to download the latest Billy & Spanner to your
click on the icon to view it if it doesn’t open on its
“FEELING LUCKY? WELL DO YOU, POKER PLAYER?”
information, contact Cynthia Theobald at 408-537-1270
ANYONE ELSE FIND THIS AS OUTRAGEOUS AS WE DO?
The item below that went viral after former Congressman
and retired Army Colonel Allen West posted it on his
website on Aug. 1st created such a furor that the
Pentagon tried to walk it back. On Monday, Aug. 3rd, Fox
News reported that a Pentagon spokesman said the chances
of charging the Lt. Cmdr who is the subject of this
posting are very “slight.”
Happening to his Heroic Navy Officer from
Chattanooga Shooting Will Make Your Blood BOIL
West — August 1, 2015
HERE to view this on Allen West’s website.
Commander Timothy White and
Islamist killer Muhammad Abdulazeez
like to be reactionary and follow anything that may just
be hyperbole or conspiracy theory. That’s why I held off
on addressing this issue until I got confirmation —
which came Friday afternoon via text message.
There are things which make you just upset, like the
liberal progressive left and media accomplices’ rage
over the shooting of a lion in Africa but abject
disregard and disdain reference Planned Parenthood
dismembering babies and selling their body parts.
But this story has me dog fighting mad and seriously
As reported ten days ago by Western Journalism, “A Navy
officer and Marine reportedly returned fire at the
shooter who killed five service members in Chattanooga,
Tenn., even though current policy does not permit
military members to carry firearms on facilities such as
those where the attack occurred.
The cold-blooded assault killed four Marines and one
active-duty Navy reservist. The center’s commanding
officer, Lt. Cmdr. Timothy White, used his personal
firearm to engage the shooter during the attack,
according to sources quoted in the Navy Times. A report
from The Washington Post said that one of the Marines
killed in the shooting might have been carrying a 9 mm
Glock and possibly returned fire on the shooter.
At the time, Western Journalism wrote, Lt. Cmdr. White
could face disciplinary action for violating policy
about possessing a weapon on the facility that was
supposedly a gun-free zone. The investigation into the
attack is ongoing, and authorities will not know if
White or the Marine hit the shooter until an autopsy and
a ballistics report have been completed.
Ladies and gents, resulting from the text message I
received yesterday, I can confirm that the United States
Navy is bringing charges against Lt. Cmdr Timothy White
for illegally discharging a firearm on federal property.
The text message asked if it would be possible for
Lt.Cmdr White to reach out to me. To wit I replied,
What kind of freaking idiots are in charge of our Armed
Forces — pardon me, our “unArmed Forces”? What would
they prefer that Abdulazeez had been able to kill all
the Marines and Sailors at the Naval Support Reserve
Center? Let me draw an interesting contrast: Secretary
of the Navy Ray Mabus is more concerned about lifting
the ban on transgendered Sailors. Mabus has a problem in
that for the first time since 2007 the US Navy will not
have a Carrier Battle Group operating in the Persian
Gulf. But this knucklehead has no problem with the Navy
seeking to destroy the career of a Sailor, a commander
of an installation, returning fire against an Islamic
jihadist attack. I do not care if it was his personal
weapon, he deserves a medal for facing the enemy.
Folks, this has become the Obama military that will not
implement policies for our men and women in uniform to
be protected — but will punish them if they do protect
themselves. What ever happened to the Navy of John Paul
Jones, Farragut, Halsey, and Nimitz? What has happened
in our America where we believe that our men and women
in uniform — especially the commanders — are just
targets for these damn Islamic jihadists?
Can you imagine the message this sends to ISIS and all
the enemies of America? We are going to end his career
and court-martial a man who drew his sidearm to protect
his command, and the assigned Sailors and Marines.
What is the difference between Lt. Cmdr White and the
reserve officer in Moore, Oklahoma who went to his
vehicle and armed himself to prevent a second woman from
being beheaded? Is it that we expect less from our
uniformed warriors? Are they just supposed to sit and be
butchered, gunned down, until local law enforcement come
along? Let’s be very clear here, I can attest that there
are many reserve and National Guard troops who are
carrying concealed during their drill periods…why?
Because they are lions, not sheep, like the imbeciles
who are making the decision to punish Lt. Cmdr White.
Doggone, what does it take? Here we have a known
deserter, Bowe Bergdahl, out getting picked up smoking
marijuana, or at a house growing marijuana. According to
Susan Rice, he served with honor and distinction. The
real men of honor such as Army 1 Lt. Clint Lorance, and
now it seems Lt. Cmdr White, are forced into jail.
Ponder this, Obama will pardon drug dealers, but men who
fight the enemy are imprisoned? Now, can someone, any
one of you inane characterless liberal progressive
trolls explain that to me? Explain it to us that you
would rather have had more Sailors and Marines die than
for this Navy Commander to draw his personal weapon in
defense of his command. That’s what the Naval Support
Center was for Lt. Cmdr White — his responsibility to
Here we have a president and secretary of state sitting
down with a sworn enemy in Iran who holds four Americans
hostage, and we’re going to bring charges against an
American Naval Commander who returned fire against the
This is indeed FUBAR!
Here’s what needs to happen. Flood the phone of SecNav
Ray Mabus and SecDef Carter and ask them whose side
they’re. Demand the charges being brought against Lt.
Cmdr White be immediately dropped. If those charges are
not dropped, I will personally lead the charge to have
Carter and Mabus removed from their positions.
America, this cannot be tolerated and must not be
allowed to stand. I guess the life of an African lion
means more to these liberal progressives than one of our
brave Sailors. It is beyond belief that the Navy would
embark upon this folly — they could simply issue a
“local letter of reprimand” that would not enter into
Lt. Cmdr White’s permanent personnel file — then
immediately pin a medal upon his chest and fast track
him for promotion to Commander.
White exemplifies the highest and finest of character
and tradition of the US Navy. Those who would bring
charges against him are indeed cowards and need be
Lieutenant Commander Timothy White, I await your call,
and I will not rest until these charges against you have
been dropped. You stay strong. You showed that you are
Steadfast and Loyal. And we will not allow you to be
abandoned to the perfumed princes of the Pentagon…and
the White House. America shall rally to your cause!
This is just another in the long line of reasons why we
must NEVER allow a progressive socialist to be
Cmdr Timothy White and his family
THIS IS OUR “FEEL GOOD” STORY OF THE WEEK
Professor Swears Cop Profiled Her; Audio Proves She’s a
Liar, Gets Her Arrested
—Playing the race card can backfire in your face,
especially when you’re lying about it—
Roychoudhuri, a professor at Capital Community College
in Hartford, Connecticut, wrote the state Department of
Emergency Services and Public Protection in June
claiming she was racially profiled by a state trooper
who pulled her over for an illegal lane change on May 9.
But after it was discovered that she lied in her report,
a warrant was issued for her arrest and she surrendered
to police on July 28, WTIC-TV reported.
Here is how Roychoudhuri described the encounter:
“An unmarked police car with flashing lights stopped me
on the ramp after I had taken the exit. The policeman
asked me if I could speak English and if I knew why he
had stopped me,” she wrote in the letter. “I said, ‘yes’
to speaking English and ‘no’ to why he had stopped me.
He then asked me for my driver’s license and
registration. He returned with an envelope and said that
I could simply mail in the infraction.
“The officer did not give me any reason as to why had
stopped me. His asking if I could speak English shows
that he had racially profiled me and was not able to
give me a concrete reason for stopping me,” Roychoudhuri
added. “Further, the officer had checked ‘Hispanic’ in
the race category in the infraction ticket. I am a
Professor in English at Capital Community College, I
teach about diversity and the negative impact of racial
profiling, I have now become a target of the same
insidious behavior! It is easy to connect the dots with
the nationwide racial profiling which has led to serious
When she was interviewed by Internal Affairs on June 15
she repeated the claims and signed a statement swearing
One problem: The audio of the stop proves the officer
never asked her if she spoke English.
A transcript of the traffic stop reads as follows, via
Officer: Hi ma’am, do you know why I’m stopping you
O: OK. There’s that big gore area with white lines
painted across it and you cut in front of it, in front
of me, thinking it’s a lane or something. You have to
wait until it’s a dotted white line. License and
(She handed him insurance, so he requested the
registration again, which she gave him)
O: Thank you. This is for your Subaru car.
R: This is my Subaru car.
O: Is this a station wagon, color green? The plate
doesn’t match what’s on there.
R: [Inaudible]…I thought that was my [inaudible]
O: I’ll run the plate and see what it comes back with.
R: This is the [inaudible] that I have.
(Officer returns to his car for three minutes to write
out the ticket for failure to drive in the established
O: Ma’am. So I wrote you the infraction for that
improper lane change that you did.
R: Please, you know, I probably crossed over there, and
that’s why I did it.
R: Obviously I did that.
R: My [inaudible] is absolutely clean.
O: OK. So I wrote you an infraction for that improper
lane change that you did.
O: The answer date is on the front of it and the
instructions are on the back of it.
R: Wait, what?
O: It’s a mail in infraction. All you have to do is mail
in, either a check or money order, and mail it in.
R: Thank you.
Roychoudhuri was arrested and charged with giving a
false statement in the second degree.
THE BEST OF THE LATE NITE JOKES
29th — Aug. 4th
July 29: It
seems like every day, another candidate comes out of the
woodwork. In fact this week, a man from Iowa whose
actual legal name is Deez Nuts, announced that he is
running for president. Then Americans looked at the
other candidates and said, “He can't be worse than DOZE
The NFL upheld Tom Brady’s four-game suspension
yesterday, and said the decision involved the fact that
Brady destroyed his cellphone just before he was
investigated. Then Hillary said, “You didn’t have to
destroy it — you just switch the SIM card memory chip!
Uh, so I’ve heard. I don't know. Bye. Gotta go."
A dentist from Minnesota went on one of those big-game
hunting trips in Africa and ended up illegally killing a
pretty famous lion named Cecil. So many people hate this
guy, Donald Trump is considering him as a running mate.
"This guy is the worst. He’s perfect for my campaign."
A recent study shows that standing at work for long
periods of time is bad for you, after earlier research
indicated that sitting for too long at work is bad for
you. So really the only thing we know is, work is bad
July 30: We’re in the middle of a heat wave here in New
York City, and temperatures are supposed to be in the
90s for the next several days. In fact Donald Trump was
so mad about the weather, he actually gave away Al
Roker's personal phone number.
Trump said if his presidential campaign fails, he will
“ride into the sunset." And if Donald Trump WINS the
presidency, Hillary says she's gonna ride off a cliff
like Thelma and Louise.
Former Virginia Governor Jim Gilmore officially
announced his campaign yesterday, bringing the total
number of Republican candidates to 17. Here's how I know
that’s too many: If I saw 17 people in line for the
BATHROOM, I’d be like, “NOPE! I'll hold it until 2020.”
This isn’t good. Democratic Congressman Chaka Fattah of
Pennsylvania could face up to 100 years in jail, after
he was charged with several counts of corruption. Which
would explain Chaka’s new name: Chaka Con.
I saw that the D.C. newspaper The Hill published its
annual list of the 50 most beautiful people in politics
yesterday. And once again, it only had five people on
July 31: It seems like everybody's weighing in on
Trump's campaign — even Dallas Mavericks owner Mark
Cuban. He said that Trump is “probably the best thing to
happen to politics in a long, long time.” Then Trump was
like, “Well, at least one Cuban loves me.”
Jeb Bush participated in his first Spanish-language
interview with Telemundo this week, where he said he's
more optimistic than the other candidates. And you can
tell he's optimistic, cuz he thinks speaking in Spanish
will help him with REPUBLICANS.
Nintendo announced a profit this quarter, marking a
turnaround from its recent earnings slide. They were
actually close to going bankrupt until they hit
up-up-down-down-left-right-B-A-select-start and got more
A new report says that San Francisco is the most
expensive city for single people in the U.S., due to the
cost of gym memberships, date nights, and clothing. So
if you don't mind being overweight, alone and naked, San
Francisco is actually quite affordable.
Aug. 3: In a recent interview, Hillary Clinton said that
one of the jobs that prepared her to be president was
sliming fish in Alaska. As opposed to Bill, who learned
by catching crabs in Cancun.
After Donald Trump gave out Lindsey Graham's personal
phone number a couple of weeks ago, the website Gawker
gave out Trump's personal cellphone number. Which
backfired when Trump just speed-insulted everyone who
called him: Loser. Moron. Idiot. Loser.
Jeb Bush's campaign and the super PACs supporting him
have raised more than $120 million so far. In fact,
Jeb's campaign was this weekend's second highest
grossing "Mission: Impossible."
Chris Christie, John Kasich, and Rick Perry are
currently fighting for the final two spots in Thursday's
Republican debate. It's going to be tough – Chris
Christie really wants those two spots.
Happy birthday to Tom Brady, who turned 38 years old
today. He had a great party, but it got weird when
someone caught him letting air out of the balloons.
Aug. 4: We have the great Don Rickles on the show
tonight. He's a guy known for brilliantly insulting
everyone in the room — or as Donald Trump calls him,
“the original me.”
The International Olympic Committee is officially
recognizing ultimate Frisbee, which means it might
actually be in the next Olympics. They say ultimate
Frisbee will be the first Olympic sport where athletes
are disqualified for NOT testing positive for drugs.
Over the weekend in Iran, temperatures reached 165
degrees, one of the highest temperatures ever recorded
on earth. In fact, it was so hot in Iran, American flags
burst into flames on their own.
It was so hot in Iran, they changed their name from Iran
Another American is in trouble for hunting a lion. First
a dentist, now a doctor is also being accused of illegal
lion hunting in Zimbabwe. Here's my question: Whatever
happened to golf, seriously? They used to play golf,
Donald Trump has fired a campaign adviser for posting
racist remarks on Facebook. Isn't that shocking? Donald
Trump has a campaign adviser.
There's a rumor out there that the CEO of Starbucks
might run for president. In fact, he opened up his first
campaign headquarters and another one right across the
The International Olympic Committee has officially
recognized Ultimate Frisbee as an Olympic sport. The
news was greeted with excitement by thousands of guys
named Chad. Guys named Chad everywhere: “This is
awesome! I'm going to the Olympics!”
Aug. 4: Thursday night is the first Republican
presidential candidates' debate. Just like "Celebrity
Apprentice," you'll see Donald Trump on TV yelling at
people you barely recognize.
Donald Trump's phone number has been leaked. When you
call Trump's cellphone number it plays a campaign
message. If you want to hear Trump's message in English,
press one. If you want to hear it in Spanish, you
probably don't follow the news.
Ben from Ben & Jerry's has endorsed Bernie Sanders for
president. After hearing this, Chris Christie said,
"After all we've been through together?"
UFC champion Ronda Rousey will be the next model for
Carl's Jr. Carl's Jr. chose Rousey because she also
knows what it's like to damage someone's organs in less
than 30 seconds.
July 29: A
designer in New York is developing the world's first
spray-on condom. True story. If you're wondering how
this works — it doesn't.
There's a new app out called MileHi that allows users to
find people on their flight who are looking to have sex.
This app is the most downloaded app at check-in and the
most deleted app at baggage claim. No one is finding
their soul mate on this app. It must be so frustrating
when the guy is like, "I'm not really looking for
anything long-term. I'm actually changing planes in
July 30: A man in the U.K. is in hot water with his wife
because the Google street view camera caught him having
a cigarette in their driveway after he claimed to have
quit smoking. If you're trying to not get caught doing
something, maybe go somewhere that's not six feet from
your front door.
That's like a drug dealer going, "Don't meet me in front
of the police station. Meet me at the Pinkberry next to
the police station. It's just safer that way."
Kentucky Fried Chicken has come out with something
called the KFC Memories Bucket, which prints pictures of
you and your friends eating their chicken. You don't
need a bucket that creates memories at KFC. You need a
bucket that destroys memories.
Aug. 3: HitchBOT, the lovable hitchhiking robot, hitched
safely across Canada, made it to the East Coast of the
United States, but unfortunately didn't get out of
Philadelphia alive. To be fair, Philadelphia is the city
that pelted Santa Claus with snowballs. They threw
batteries at their own baseball team, and forced Will
Smith to go live with his auntie and uncle in Bel Air.
Poor sweet HitchBOT was vandalized, his head and arms
were torn off, and then he was left on the side of the
road. When reached for comment, Philadelphia said, "Yep.
That sounds about right."
There's a new study that says standing for prolonged
periods of time on the job can lead to long-term back
pain and musculoskeletal disorders. Which is kind of
funny because for the last three years all we've been
hearing is how bad it is to sit all day at work. Maybe
the problem isn't standing or sitting, maybe the problem
Donald Trump — there are still 15 months to go in this
election, he was all over the news again today. He's on
everything all the time. I don't know how he's going to
keep up this pace. Donald Trump has reached a saturation
level that is nothing short of Kardashian-esque.
A hot new surf destination has been discovered and it's
none other than North Korea. Up until this point,
surfboards have been used primarily as a means of escape
from North Korea. I can't think of any country that
embodies the easygoing surfer attitude more than North
Korea. The Beach Boys should definitely write a song
The NFL upheld the four-game suspension they imposed on
Tom Brady for his suspected role in Deflategate, which
upset Tom Brady — he was expecting it to be reduced,
especially since one of his colleagues got a two-game
suspension for hitting his wife in an elevator.
The league upheld the suspension because they said Tom
Brady willfully obstructed his investigation by telling
his assistant to destroy his cellphone. The way the NFL
is reacting to this, you'd think they caught Tom Brady
running a meth lab under Gillette Stadium.
July 30: Summer is the best, really it is. Summer is to
the four seasons what Frankie Valli is to the Four
Seasons — a little joke for the older folks.
Angry Birds 2 was released today. It's about time. The
other day I was forced to throw a seagull at the wall.
The original game was hugely popular and made many
millions of dollars. You'd think all that success would
have made the birds happy, but apparently not. They are
still very, very angry.
Donald Trump is still leading all Republican candidates
for president. A new Quinnipiac University poll, which
of all the major polls is the hardest to say, has Donald
While Donald Trump leads the Republican field by a wide
margin right now, he seems to be unelectable. The same
poll shows him losing to Hillary Clinton by 12 points.
Losing to Joe Biden by 12 points. Losing by 8 points to
Bernie Sanders. He's 5 points behind Bill Cosby.
"Rogue Nation" opens tomorrow, the fifth movie in the
"Mission: Impossible" franchise. I'm starting to think
the mission is possible. Four times in a row and
probably for a fifth.
Trump said yesterday that he would love to have Sarah
Palin in his administration because she is somebody who
knows what's happening. Said Sarah Palin, "Trump's
running for president? When did that happen?"
Chris Christie said yesterday if he's elected, he'll
fight against legalized marijuana, so Colorado and
Washington residents had better, quote, "Smoke that pot
now." Colorado and Washington residents said, "OK. That
was the plan all along. Are you guys trying to trick us?
Hey, if you're a cop, you have to tell us. You're eating
A teen couple has won over $20,000 in scholarship money
for making their prom outfits. They made their prom
outfits entirely from duct tape. Unfortunately, they had
to spend it all on hospital bills after taking the
Scientists said yesterday that the T. Rex may have had
teeth serrated like a steak knife, which may have helped
it eat meat more efficiently. Experts believe the T. Rex
evolved the knife-like teeth after having so much
trouble using regular silverware.
You hear less about Hillary Clinton, she's not giving a
lot of interviews because I think she's looking at
everyone else who's running for president, and she's
thinking, “If I keep my mouth shut, I think I've got
Hillary Clinton revealed today she thinks her biggest
weakness is her impatience. Said the interviewer, "Mrs.
Clinton, I haven't asked you anything yet."
Hillary also said today that her greatest strength is
her passionate commitment to helping people. For
instance, there was that time in 2008 when she helped a
young black man from Chicago become president.
NFL training camp began today for many teams. As usual,
the New England Patriots camp began with the ceremonial
burning of the rule book.
A director for the show "Law & Order" was arrested
yesterday on child pornography charges. But I don't
think he did it, because it's never the first guy they
Aug. 3: Donald Trump is still leading the Republican
polls, with support from 19 percent of voters. Of
course, it’s only a matter of time before Trump slips up
and says something completely sane.
Dr. Drew has announced that he will release his first
album in 15 years. Wow, we’ve waited 15 years for a
follow-up? I guess he really is a doctor.
Oreo has come out with a new lower calorie cookie called
Oreo Thins. Which is also a good way to describe people
who eat them. “I wouldn’t say you’re fat, I’d say you’re
... Oreo Thin.”
Aug. 4: Kermit the Frog and Miss Piggy announced today
that they're ending their relationship of nearly 30
years. I guess in the end, Miss Piggy just had a fear of
It was so hot in Sochi this past weekend, they created a
new Olympic sport, "downhill water skiing."
WEEKLY SNOPES URBAN LEGEND UPDATE
HERE for the most current update.
• • • • •
If you love music, you are going to want to bookmark
this website that is touted as the Best Jukebox Ever.
And we believe it. Not only is it the most extensive we
have seen in the number of artists and selections, the
songs also include videos or photos of the artists. When
you click on an artist or group, the first song will
begin to play. To select another song, click on the
Playlist in the upper left portion of the screen.
(Note: You may need to expand the window to the maximum
to view the entire page as it is massive.)
HERE to give it a look and listen.
• • • • •
If you have never seen 1,000 musicians all playing at
the same time, click
HERE and watch this clip of the Foo Fighters leading
the group in Cesena, Italy sent in by Dirk Parsons. The
song is “Learn to Fly.” (7:28)
• • • • •
Want to take another nostalgic trip back to the ‘50s.
THIS contribution from Mike Thompson is your ticket.
(He loves this clip because the pic below bears a slight
resemblance to the classic pick-up parked in his
garage.) Have a good trip. (3:40)
• • • • •
If you want to have some fun, let’s go dancing by
HERE and watching this clip that Pete Salvi posted
on Facebook. (3:18)
• • • • •
Staying on the same subject, what are your 10 favorite
dance scenes from Hollywood dance movies? Are any of
YOURS included in this Top 10 List? (13:48)
• • • • •
This contribution from Alice Murphy isn’t exactly what
we would call a flashdance, but it’s close. And if it
brings to mind the movie “10” with Bo Derek, that’s
HERE, sit back and enjoy “Bolero” by the Queensland
Symphony Orchestra. (6:01)
• • • • •
This Trolley Bags video that Lynne Caro posted on
Facebook may be of interest to whoever in your family
does the grocery shopping, especially now that the free
plastic bags are verboten. The bad news is, the bags are
only available in Australia, New Zealand and the UK at
this time. The good news is, the company said they will
SELLING them here in the U.S. soon. (1:13)
• • • • •
Tom Macris says this article from the Aug. 3rd on-line
edition of Fortune gives new meaning to the term, “Have
a stiff one,” and that it shows how far China is ahead
of the U.S. Click
HERE to see what Paul Harvey would call “the rest of
• • • • •
This is why
you’ve gotta love the Irish, according to David Byers.
Airborne approximately thirty minutes on an outbound
evening flight from Dublin, the lead flight attendant
nervously made the following painful announcement:
"Ladies and gentlemen, I'm so very sorry, but it appears
that there has been a terrible mix-up just prior to
takeoff by our airport catering service. I don't know
how this happened, but we have 103 passengers on board
and only 40 dinner meals. I truly apologize for this
mistake and inconvenience."
When the passengers' muttering had died down, she
”Anyone who is kind enough to give up their meal so that
someone else can eat will receive free, unlimited drinks
for the duration of our 5-hour flight."
Her next announcement came 90 minutes later: ”Ladies and
gentlemen, if anyone would like to change their minds,
we still have 40 dinners available."
• • • • •
other generation seen such radical changes? We say no,
and this is why:
phone the 6-year-old granddaughter has.
phone her mother had when she was six.
phone the mother’s dad had when he was six.
• • • • •
Unless you have a waterproof keyboard, try not to
salivate when you watch Clip 1 of the Terrafugia TF-X as
it is still a few years off in the future. Clip 2,
however, is already a reality.
HERE to watch clip 1 (3:08)
HERE to watch clip 2 (3:57)
• • • • •
Is this really an Orangutan Tokyo Zoological Park
cooling himself off like a human, or a human in an
Orangutan costume? We
REPORT, you decide. (2:21)
CLIP of an Orangutan bathing itself could help
explain their behavior. (1:18)
• • • • •
As short clips go, this one could answer the age-old
CATS mind getting their feet wet?" (0:25)
• • • • •
This might be one of the most amazing animal videos you
are likely to see. It’s about a cat that thinks it gave
THREE ducklings along with some kittens. (5:29)
• • • • •
Speaking of felines,
THIS may be a Friskies’ ad, but that doesn’t make it
any less entertaining if you are a cat or dog owner.
Meet the star of the show, “Grumpy Cat.” (2:31)
• • • • •
This Rochester cop’s dashcam footage that shows him
handling a dangerous self-initiated call should justify
him being awarded a Hazardous Duty Medal. Have a
LOOK and see if you agree. (0:57)
• • • • •
Looking for a cute, little friendly pet to adopt? Think
about this little critter. When most people see a
Meerkat they immediately think about Timon from "Lion
King.” But it turns out that the real animal is way more
entertaining than its on-screen portrayal. Will Burrard-Lucas
found this out first-hand on a recent expedition for a
photography project where he was attempting to capture
FOOTAGE of Meerkats in a natural environment. (2:12)
• • • • •
If you are looking for a small critter as a pet and a
Meerkat doesn’t float your boat, you can always head for
the pet store and pick up a Rat. Just try to forget that
the fleas they carried were responsible for tens of
millions of deaths from the Bubonic Plague (Black Death)
that swept across Europe in the 14th century. Have a
THIS clip and you will find them not only adorable,
but easy to train. (3:56)
• • • • •
Have 32 seconds to spare? After watching numerous people
do backflips and dive off the cliffs at
THIS locale in Malta, a little dog decided it was
time to stop being a spectator and start being a
participant. We give the mutt a score of 9.5. (0:32)
• • • • •
If you have sported a beard for many years and want to
see what the reaction from others might be if you got
rid of that hairy growth,
THIS Israeli ad for a razor might give you an idea
of what it would be like. (3:02)
• • • • •
On a far more serious note, this video is about a male
and female officer who stopped a subject who turned out
to be armed with an AK, but the cops were unaware of the
danger until the subject came out shooting. Leroy has it
right. This two-minute clip illustrates a beat cop’s
WORST nightmare. (2:04)
• • • • •
Snippets of this video are not pleasant to watch, but it
speaks to the
TRUTH. It takes on the national media for fanning
the flames of hate. (6:52)
• • • • •
On a positive note, the SJPD hasn’t experienced an
embarrassing situation like this. At least not yet.
There are three newscasts in
THIS video about a Memphis cop who resigned before
she was about to be fired for participating in rap
videos, hanging with the Bloods and several other
violations of the Memphis PD duty manual. (7:16)
• • • • •
Could we see the day when an illegal alien (sorry,
“undocumented immigrant”) becomes the governor of
California? Yes, that’s an extreme example, but is the
proverbial camel about to poke its nose under the tent?
If you are surprised by the headline and pic below,
HERE and check out the story that appeared in the
Aug. 3rd edition of the L.A. Times.
• • • • •
This week’s helpful hints item comes from Alice Murphy
whose contribution shows you ten ways to use
RUBBER BANDS that you may not have been aware of.
• • • • •
heads should appreciate this time lapse
VIDEO of an engine rebuild set to the perfect
musical piece. Check it out. (2:20)
• • • • •
If you have never seen a motocross rider use his bike to
surf ocean waves, you should have a
LOOK at this short production titled “Pipe Dream”
• • • • •
Along similar lines, the spectacular scenery of northern
THIS video of Dougie Lampkin performing the sport of
Motorcycle Trials should be worth a few minutes of your
time, especially when he rides through a hotel made
entirely of ice. (6:57)
• • • • •
If you were a fan of the late Carl Sagan and his
“Cosmos” series, you should find this short animated
film compelling as Carl’s narration was used in its
production. Titled “Wanderers,” the locations depicted
FILM are actual locations in our solar system and
were created using real photos and maps whenever
• • • • •
Here is some red meat for those of you who believe that
UFOs not only exist, but that they are controlled by
beings not of this earth. We recommend against
poo-pooing the video unless you are absolutely sure you
EVERYTHING there is to know. (7:04)
• • • • •
We are closing
THIS week’s Farsider with this touching video clip
about a little boy who misses his dad who is serving
overseas. Sure, it’s an ad that runs for only one
minute, but that doesn’t make it any less heart-warming.
• • • • •
Pic of the Week
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Abram, Fred & Connie
Alvarez, Pat (Campbell)
Babineau, Dave & Cheryl
Bray, Mary Ellen
Brown Jr., Bill
Burroughs, (Bronson) Utta
Carr Jr., John
Carrillo, Jaci Cordes
Clark, Bill (the one who stayed)
Embry (Howsmon), Eva
Foulkes [Duchon], Louise
Gonzalez, D. (formerly D. Avila)
Guido, Jr., Jim
Guido, Sr. Jim
Hare, Caren (Carlisle)
Harnish, Mary (Craven)
Horton, Debbie (McIntyre)
Howsmon (Sr.), Frank
Inami, Steve & Francine
Johnson, Tom & Fran
Klein, Lou Anna
Leonard (Lintern), Lynda
Muldrow, Mark "Mo"
O'Carroll, Diane (Azzarello)
Perry (Cervantez), Martha
Rappe (Ryman), Bonnie
Reyes (Buell), Cindy
Richter, Darrell & Annette
Schenini (Alvarez), Joanne
Taves, Phil & Paula
Terry, Glenn & Maggie
Vallecilla, Ernie & Peggy
Van Dyck, Lois
Williams [Durham], Lanette
Windisch Jr., Steve