Mattos, Editor and Publisher
Leroy Pyle, Webmaster
The Farsider is an independent publication that is not
affiliated with the San Jose Police Benevolent
Assn. The SJPBA has allowed the Farsider to be included on its web site solely
for the convenience
of the retired San Jose Police community. The content of this newsletter does
not represent or reflect
the views of the San Jose Police Benevolent Association's Board of Directors or
Note the addendum to this Membership Alert from Don Hale that
appears at the bottom...
to read our first Membership Alert about Jim Lisius for those of you who missed
it. Since that time, there have been positive developments on the financial
stability front we wanted to make you aware of.
John and I both wanted to publicly thank POA CFO Franco Vado, POA office manager
Joanne Segovia, Donna Busse (Retirement Services), Derendinger Insurance Agency
and the PORAC I&B Trust Boardmembers for their efforts and hard work in
restoring benefits to Jim Lisius and his family.
You remember that Jim lost access to his pension, long-term disability insurance
and life insurance when he was terminated for behavior issues. It wasn't until
later that Jim was diagnosed with A.L.S. (Lou Gehrig's Disease), which explained
Jim's behavior. Once Jim's employment was reinstated, Franco and Joanne worked
with retirement services to facilitate his retirement.
They then worked with PORAC and were able to reinstate his long-term disability
insurance which will subsidize his pension. Lastly, with the help of the
Derendinger Insurance Agency, they were able to reinstate his life insurance.
Lastly, for all of the members who helped with the fundraising efforts to help
purchase Jim a handicap equipped van, thank you.
Please be aware that the funds raised for Jim's van, while wonderful and a great
example of our police community supporting one of our own, only produced about
one-third of the actual cost of the used van that was acquired. Should any
additional updates be sent out, it would be great if that information can be
My wife Gloria has ALS, and Chaplain Bridgen hooked us up with Jim and his
family, so I am fully aware of the horrific costs, financially as well as
emotionally. So if our folks are made aware of this information they may know of
other resources that may be able assist further, or they might even wish to
contribute more, if they can.
Don Hale #1663 retired
THE TRIALS AND TRIBULATIONS OF THE CITY AND SJPD
The creation of Community Services Officers to supplement the
SJPD comes as no surprise. What is surprising is that the new classification
didn't come sooner...
SJPD Trains Civilian Officers
Community service workers to relieve overstretched force
Mercury News July 23, 2014
SAN JOSE In another response to its ongoing staffing troubles, the San Jose
Police Department has started training a battalion of civilian officers aimed at
taking some of the burden off an overstretched force.
The citys first-ever Community Service Officer program launched its initial
five-week academy Tuesday, which will begin putting 25 recruits 13 men and 12
women through the paces of what will come to include taking non-urgent
burglary and auto-theft calls and helping shoulder a considerable report-writing
The addition of CSOs to patrol will enhance our operational abilities, freeing
up patrol officers from cold reports, enabling them to conduct more proactive
police work, Chief Larry Esquivel said in a statement.
This new program will also enhance our community partnership which is critical
considering our staffing woes.
Officials are quick to point out that the civilian officers will not be
responding to any calls that involve an active suspect and that if civilian
officers run into trouble, they are to call for regular police officers. They
are going to be equipped with pepper spray in the event of an immediate threat
to their safety. The CSO program has been more than a year in the making. One of
the ways police have been trying to sell the program to prospective applicants
is that it gives hands-on exposure to police work, as their jobs will entail
assisting patrol, writing reports, addressing traffic complaints and non-injury
car accidents, and helping with crowd control at special events, among other
duties. They may even be called upon to help protect crime scenes. The new
officers will be supervised by a police sergeant and will wear light blue
uniforms with police-style insignia but will be distinct from the traditional
police blues, and drive in white Ford Focus sedans with Community Service
Officer emblazoned on the side.
The academy graduation is set for Aug. 21, after which graduates will go through
three weeks of field training, with a ready-to-deploy date of Sept. 14.
Community service officers serve a supplementary role in Palo Alto, Fremont and
several other Bay Area cities, dealing predominantly with so-called quality of
life crimes like burglary, car theft and vandalism that typically only entail a
report being taken.
The inspiration for the program in San Jose, however, is largely to fill a void:
SJPDs ranks have shrunk from more than 1,400 in 2008 to just over 1,000 about
900 of them street-ready and officers continue to leave amid a political
battle between the police union and city leaders over pay, disability and
Minimum patrol targets call for 492 officers but just 450 are staffing the
positions, with the difference made up by overtime shifts worked in part by
bringing other divisions into the fold, including detectives and SWAT officers.
How much of a dent the initial 25 civilian officers can make into that shortfall
is anyones guess, but the general goal is to make the CSO program more robust
by fielding academies and making hires on a parallel track to the traditional
police recruitment process.
Sgt. Jim Unland, president of the San Jose Police Officers Association,
considers the programs existence less of a boon and more of a reflection of the
departments recruiting abilities.
This is not going to decrease our response time, and it doesnt put cops on the
street. No one is safer because of this, Unland said.
He also voiced concerns about issuing the CSOs pepper spray, particularly the
liability risk since for police officers, its considered a use of force that
can subject them to civil litigation.
The baseline qualifications for becoming a CSO are a high-school diploma, valid
drivers license and no felony convictions. They will adhere to city pay steps,
starting at around $52,000 and reaching up to $72,000 in nine years.
For the inaugural academy class, police reviewed upward of 800 applicants, about
100 of which made it to the backgrounding process and were further vetted until
the current crop remained.
Following is a missive from Les Nunes that got buried under
several other items during the two weeks we didn't publish. It should have been
in last week's Mail Call column...
hope you have a good 4th of July. The forecast up here calls for a high of 98
and I'll bet we won't fall short; it's already 90 and it's not yet 9:30. Still,
we'll definitely get out and celebrate somehow. I just saw something on our
local news website that might be of interest to some of your Farsider readers.
Take care. I need to get outside, sit in the sun, and take the chill off.
will take you to the website and the article Les sent in. It's about a 1970
robbery at Dodge Ridge.
The Reno Air Races are getting close Sept 10-14, 2014. For those attending,
here are two short previews of what you will see from my brother Mike, one of
the pylon judges.
Seven Days in
Seven Days in September: Part
THE BEST OF THE LATE NITE JOKES
July 16th through July 22nd
President Obama called German Chancellor Angela Merkel yesterday to talk about
improving relations with our country after this latest spying scandal. Obama
made her a pretty good offer. He said, "Look, we'll stop spying if we can borrow
your soccer team."
Speaking of Obama, yesterday Congressman Raul Labrador said that impeaching
President Obama isn't a good idea, because, quote, "no one wants President Joe
Biden." And that's when Biden realized why Obama picked him as a running mate.
I just saw that minor league baseball players have filed a class-action lawsuit
to demand better pay as opposed to the OTHER way they could get better pay:
being better at baseball.
This week, our pal Rob Ford faced off against his four challengers in a debate
for Toronto mayor. His opponents were, of course, pretty critical of his
performance, but Ford said, "Hey, my record slurs for itself."
Chris Christie warned against presidential candidates running too soon. Then
earthquake experts warned Chris Christie against running at all. "Cities just
aren't equipped to deal with it."
President Obama said that his strategy for foreign policy is to be patient and
determined. Which is also his strategy when it comes to Biden's bedtime.
There are reports that Amazon is coming out with a new service for the Kindle
that will be like a Netflix for books. You can look at a bunch of different
books but you don't have to buy them. Or, as Barnes & Noble calls that, "Our
President Obama was giving an interview recently, and get this, he said he
thought that Joe Biden would be a good president. When asked why, he was like,
"Because he'd make me look AMAZING."
Edward Snowden is back with yet another spying scandal. In a new interview,
Snowden revealed that NSA employees regularly pass around nude pictures of
people they spy on. It got even weirder when German Chancellor Angela Merkel
said, "So, vat do you think?"
I heard that Rob Ford's nephew is planning to run for a seat on the Toronto City
Council. He has an interesting campaign slogan: "I'm adopted!"
Last night, a 105-year-old woman threw out the first pitch at the San Diego
Padres game. It got a bit weird when she turned to 50 Cent and said, "Now THAT'S
how you throw a baseball!"
I saw that Hillary Clinton visited the headquarters of Twitter and Facebook
yesterday. Hillary would also have visited LinkedIn, but she already knows what
job she wants.
Netflix revealed earlier this week that it now has more than 50 million users
and one actual subscriber. I love Netflix!
A JetBlue pilot was arrested this week and charged with heroin possession.
Passengers could tell something was up when, during their flight, he announced,
"To your left you'll see the Grand Canyon, and to your right you'll see a
I just read about this student at MIT who's created a new robot that can play
Connect Four. Yes, an emotionless machine that can occasionally sit down and
play a board game with you, or as I called that growing up my Dad.
major wildfire in northern California is now being blamed on marijuana farmers.
Everyone in the region's really angry about it unless they're downwind, then
they're totally cool.
There's currently a petition to split California into several states. Among the
new states would be Botoxia, Pornsylvania, and of course, the Commonwealth of
The drought is so bad, we're taking extreme measures in two weeks. That is the
most California thing I have ever heard of. This is serious, man!
This drought we're in big trouble. We're going to do something about it
eventually, if we feel like it!
"Star Wars" fans are very upset that the story line of the upcoming new "Star
Wars" movie has been leaked. Apparently the movie starts with R2-D2, Chewbacca,
and Han Solo all waking up in Vegas.
Officials are concerned that people in Los Angeles are too apathetic about the
drought. We're not doing anything about it. Of course, that will change next
week when we announce that the drought is killing all the marijuana crops.
NSA whistleblower Edward Snowden is back in the news. He says the military at
the NSA often shared nude photos that Americans had emailed to one another. So
if your girlfriend won't send you naked pictures, just tell her, do it for the
A professor from U.C. Berkeley said we are on track for having the worst drought
in 500 years. Which explains why Larry King was overheard saying, "This again?"
You can tell this drought is getting really bad. Today at lunch, my waiter asked
if I wanted a glass of water or a future for my children. I took the water.
There's a lot of speculation about the new iPhone. It's expected to have a
larger screen and a better operating system. Yes, the new iPhone will be called
last year's Samsung Galaxy.
Netflix is testing a new feature that will allow you to hide what you've been
watching. You just click the button and it says, I want to stay married.
New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie is in Iowa campaigning at a big cookout because
this is what you do if you want to be president. He's out there all day telling
people the hotdog line is closed for a traffic study.
If you are attending this campaign cookout in Iowa, please, this is sort of like
the running of the bulls in Pamplona. Do not get between the governor and the
The New York City Fire Department calendar is here and it's sizzling. A full
year of shirtless, hunky heroes. Also available, the companion calendar: just
the shirts. All the sexy shirts the firefighters weren't wearing.
People love the new Pope, but I think it's safe to say he's gone crazy. Now he's
thinking about doing away with celibacy for priests. Are you like me? Are you
thinking "Real Housewives of the Vatican?"
I don't know if this is a good idea or not. Do you really want a priest showing
up for the last rites with a date?
Now the FCC wants to update the Emergency Alert System so the president can
interrupt any TV program. "We interrupt this program so the president can tell
America what he had for lunch: a good bowl of matzo ball soup. This concludes
today's presidential lunch update."
President Kennedy said let's put a man on the moon, and by God, 10 years later
we put a man on the moon. Yesterday was the 45th anniversary. Nowadays a big
deal for us is we combined the croissant and the doughnut to get a cronut.
When we landed on the moon everybody remembers what they were doing, and
everybody remembers what Neil Armstrong said just before he left the capsule and
stepped onto the surface of the moon. He said: "Out of my way, Buzz!" Whack!
A 105-year-old women in San Diego threw out the first pitch in a baseball game.
I think it's great to see Barbara Walters is still out there.
She pitched seven scoreless innings! And she's the only woman who slept with
both Alex Rodriguez and Babe Ruth.
It's not only David Hasselhoff's birthday, it's also the birthday of Angela
Merkel, the chancellor of Germany. One is Germany's most powerful leader, but is
not afraid to look feminine. And the other one is Angela Merkel.
It's a great day for a man in Brazil. He's 126 and has been called the world's
oldest person. He says the highlight of his life was playing goalie for Brazil
in this year's World Cup.
These huge white flags were placed on top of the Brooklyn Bridge. And late this
afternoon, word came from the FBI that the New York Mets have surrendered.
Happy birthday to England's Prince George, who turns 1 today. The princes first
birthday party was a little different. His bouncy castle was an actual castle.
And the pony rides were on Camilla.
Queen Elizabeth's horse tested positive for morphine and a mix of other powerful
drugs. Sources say the queen is in denial. She thinks someone confused her
horse's urine sample with Prince Harry's.
So remember, horses, when it comes to drugs, just say Neigh.
Yesterday, Iran asked the U.S. for an extension on disabling their nuclear
program. When asked how much time they needed, they said, "10, 9, 8..."
This week Dick Cheney called President Obama "the worst president of my
lifetime." Oh come on, Obama may not be perfect, but there's no way he's worse
than John Quincy Adams.
Today, Lays announced that cappuccino is one of the finalists for their new
chip flavor contest. And if you think that sounds bad, wait until you try
Starbucks' new Sour Cream and Onion Latte.
Today is the 30th anniversary of the National Minimum Drinking Age Act, which
raised the drinking age to 21. Also turning 30 today: a 16-year-old boy,
according to his fake ID.
A federal judge ruled yesterday that California's version of the death penalty
is unconstitutional. Apparently the difference is California's version has
avocado on it.
According to a new report, 81 percent of people would cheat on their partner if
there were no consequences, while 19 percent of people are pretty sure this is a
Even though both Israel and Hamas fired on one another during the five-hour
humanitarian period yesterday, the U.N. secretary general said both sides
"mostly respected" the cease-fire. That's like leaving the house without pants
and saying you're "mostly dressed."
In a recent interview, President Obama said Joe Biden "would be a superb
president." In a related story, Hillary Clinton punched a hole in a door.
The Chicago Cubs have filed a lawsuit against a man who got into a bar fight
while unofficially dressed as the team's mascot. They could tell he wasnt
affiliated with the Cubs because he won.
According to a new poll, two-thirds of people in Colorado think it should be
illegal to smoke marijuana in public, while the other one-third are still
laughing at the word "poll."
A judge wrote an opinion today in favor of Obamacare, saying that getting
healthcare from the state or federal government is the same as ordering from
Pizza Hut vs. Domino's. Im not sure I agree. THEIR websites always worked.
Today, Secretary of State John Kerry traveled to Egypt and had to pass through a
metal detector before he could meet with officials. Which is ridiculous.
Everyone knows he's made of wood.
Today is National Hammock Day. And just like a hammock, I can't get into it.
The 17-year-old daughter of one of the "Real Housewives of Beverly Hills" was
arrested today for DUI and driving on a suspended license. She's expected to
receive 12 months of probation and a spinoff.
WEEKLY SNOPES URBAN LEGEND UPDATE AS OF JULY 19, 2014
This week's update is longer than usual because
it includes updates from the past three weeks.
Is the state of New York requiring residents to take their
for annual safety inspections?
Rumors claim infamous mom
has adopted a baby girl from Romania and/or is pregnant with twins.
Public Service Announcement calling for
seemingly subverts its own message.
Has President Obama proclaimed August 2014 to be 'International
Photograph purportedly shows boxes of Tyson "[inverted]
In celebration of
we present a collection of distinctly Canadian urban legends.
Update to Hobby Lobby's lawsuit over a federal mandate requiring
to provide insurance coverage for contraceptives.
Weather Channel founder John Coleman issued comments refuting
Are U.S. troops stationed in Muslim countries being ordered to fast and submit
Rumor claims college cafeteria food is laced with
to avoid liability for food poisoning or weight gain.
newscaster mistakenly assumes that
in a Middle Eastern country now walk ahead of their husbands due to an advance
in societal roles.
the sprinkles used on confections, so named as a reference to Jim Crow?
Quick-thinking cop has a bit of fun with a
stuck in the snow
by pretending to run alongside his car.
E-mail phishing scam poses as
for E-ZPass bills.
allegedly engaging in a 'dry run' hijacking on AirTran Flight 297.
How the Tommy Tutone song
prompted a flood of calls to the phone number 867-5309.
Did a recent study disprove a link between
and skin cancer?
Do hospital mortality rates go up in July due to an influx of
Has Costco pulled copies of
'America: Imagine a World Without Her' from their stores?
Was an Oklahoma City
caught with horse meat and human meat in their freezers?
Was Smithfield Foods sold to a Chinese company that will be
and processing hogs raised in the U.S.?
Did a man begin receiving messages from his girlfriend via Facebook more than
she died in an accident?
Are U.S. schools requiring children to be implanted with
in an effort to curb gun violence?
Did police recently find 17 plastic-wrapped
in the Ohio River?
Marine named Shawn Vernon
in locating a box of lost shirts.
Revival song 'Fortunate Son' inspired by Al Gore, Jr.?
Does an Arizona man keep his
in a glass-cased piece of furniture?
Toronto lawyer demonstrating the safety of window panes in a skyscraper
through a window to his death.
Did a Hobby Lobby store manager
a gay employee by stoning?
Still not dead: actress/singer
It's another celebrity death hoax.
How scammers pretending to be
call victims to gain access to their computers and/or bank accounts.
Will bananas be
within ten years?
Did President Obama stop wearing his
and wristwatch for Ramadan?
Is castoreum, a secretion produced by
used as a food additive?
Scientists drilling in
went too far and ended up punching a hole through to Hell, where the screams of
the damned drifted up to them.
Was the Pentagon built with
to accommodate racial segregation laws?
Soupy Sales was legendary for sneaking
into his TV show. But did he really?
Did radio stations shun the
'In God We Still Trust' because of its subject matter?
multi-colored 'rainbow grapes.'
Are Canadian police
for parking their cars with the windows down?
Who wrote the
Was it St. Augustine, or someone else?
number of strange deaths are connected to the
Don't forget to visit our
for a collection of odd news stories from around the world!
Worth a Second Look
Did the American Library Association report a nationwide 500% increase in
from children after a 1977 episode of "Happy Days" aired?
Still Haunting the Inbox
Check out our
Hottest Urban Legends
list to keep abreast of what's circulating in the on-line world.
page for a list of schemes commonly used by crooks to separate the unwary from
THE LIGHTER SIDE & OTHER ODDS AND ENDS
Large or Full Screen preferred for YouTube videos
This catchy tune from Alice Murphy about Older Ladies has received over 5
million YouTube views. Have a listen by clicking
and you will understand why. (3 Mins.)
But when it comes to
songs featuring "ladies," we would have to agree with Bill "Hound Dog" Clinton,
who reserves his thumbs-up sign for
one about the Girls on Fox News. (4 Mins.)
Personal to Rupert Murdoch and Roger Ailes...
Thank you, guys!
those of you have seen snippets on the news about the Marine Harrier pilot who
landed his aircraft with a nose wheel that wouldn't lower, this is the
video released by the Navy of the incident, as told by the pilot. (3 Mins.)
the subject of hairy landings (as opposed to Harrier landings), imagine you are
at the controls of this Lynx helicopter and it's your job to set it down on the
pitching deck of
British naval vessel in the middle of a storm. (2 Mins.)
you needed a tree felled on your back deck without damaging your house or shed,
would you hire
guy? (3 Mins.)
Come take a lazy ride down a quiet river, just remember to keep your hands
inside the boat.
is why. (1 Min.)
Someone had the
great idea of flying a drone equipped with a Hi-Def GoPro video camera through
the middle of a fireworks show, and
was the result. (4 Mins.)
Ever heard of a bird lengthening its tail feathers with a sheet of paper?
Neither had we until we saw
video. (2 Mins.)
swim when you can ride, right? Mama doesn't seem to mind, so
aboard, kids. (2 Mins.)
Here is your challenge for the week: Of these seven kittens, which
has the fastest reflexes? (33 Secs.)
Tiny Birthday for a Tiny Hedgehog? They're kidding, right? Wrong. Watch
Looking for an industrial strength shredder? Perhaps
little puppy will suffice. (3 Mins.)
needs playground equipment for the "kids" when "Mr. G" is willing to volunteer
time and back? ((2 Mins.)
It's said that art is in the eye of the beholder. We have no doubt that
image represents art, it's the pile of junk it's based on that is hard to
believe. (40 Secs.)
Wouldn't it be fun to watch
guy try to use his homemade skateboard on steroids on some of the downhill cable
car tracks in S.F.? (1 Min.)
wedding proposals go,
one could be considered rather unique. Have a look and see if you agree. (1
an iPad? You may find
video about how they are made of interest if you do. (3 Mins.)
understand what's going on in this clip you need to be aware of the coffee cup
on the rear bumper of this
This year-old hot chase is continuing to show up on Facebook and other social
media. After a Las Vegas PD bait car was shut down, the thief managed to escape,
run onto a golf course and bag himself a maintenance golf cart and the chase was
on again. But
at who did the chasing. (9 Mins.)
back and smile if you can remember hearing
song by the Sons of the Pioneers on the radio or on a 78 rpm record when you
were a kid. (3 Mins.)
Check out this amazing blue shipping container that has been converted into a
camera and click
to see how it works. (1 Min.)
Have you ever heard a drummer keep pace with a classical piece like the Barber
of Seville? This guy has turned it into musical art. Have a
and listen. (3 Mins.)
What's happening here, you ask? The guy in red is about to set an indoor record
of 226 feet with a
airplane designed by the guy in blue. By their reaction you would have thought
they won the lottery. (1 Min.)
Dick Tush is inviting all of you to have a
inside the Le Plus Grand Cabaret Du Monde in Paris and watch Alex and Anny
perform live on stage. (6 Mins.)
many people, the "Swells" are comprised of the rich and famous of the Hollywood
set, and one of their perks is the opportunity to attend the Academy Awards in
person. What the TV audience didn't see a few months ago was
performance by Cirque Du Soleil that preceded the opening of the Awards. (4 Mins.)
While this week's closer from Don Hale goes back a few years to 2009, it is one
of the most impressive military marching formations we've ever seen. What makes
it unique is that it's comprised entirely of Chinese female military personnel
marching in China's 60th Anniversary Military Parade. Their precision rivals
that of any other military in the world.
it out. (2 Mins.)
Pic of the Week
Relax. The white flag that mysteriously replaced the American Flag atop
the Brooklyn Bridge earlier this week was a prank. It did NOT mean
that we have surrendered to the world, or that the U.S. has been
invaded by France and that they raised their flag as a sign of victory.