The Farsider

June 21, 2018

Bill Mattos, Editor and Publisher <bilmat@comcast.net>
Leroy Pyle, Webmaster <leroypyle@sjpba.net>

 

The Farsider is an independent publication that is not affiliated with the San Jose Police Benevolent
Assn. The SJPBA has allowed the Farsider to be included on its website solely for the convenience of
the retired San Jose Police community. The content of this newsletter does not represent or reflect
the views of the San Jose Police Benevolent Association's Board of Directors or its membership.



BOB KABRICH PHOTOS


Last week’s entry about the passing of former Officer Bob Kabrich lacked a photo. Ron Webster, who brought Bob to our attention a week earlier, successfully made contact with Bob’s son who provided the photos below of his dad. The pic at the top is Bob with his first wife, Judy. (Her obit was in last week’s Farsider.) She was a flight attendant prior to their marriage. Afterwards, she worked as a Matron for the Santa Clara Co. S/O at the Women’s Detention Facility at Elmwood in Milpitas. No dates were provided for the other photos, but it’s safe to say that the photo on the left in the middle is quite old as it shows Bob with a young looking Randy Cardin...



POA NEWS

Nothing new as of press time.



THE TRIALS AND TRIBULATIONS OF SAN JOSE AND THE SJPD

Nothing of note for this column, either.



MAIL CALL



June 16th

Bill,

You probably won’t want to include this in your newsletter since it’s old and has been in the Farsider in the past, but I can’t help myself. Surely there are at least a handful of your readers who would like to see it again. See the link below.

Red State
<RedState70@comcast.net>

I’m not only including it again, Red, I also posted it on the 10-7ODSJ Facebook page with a lead-in that read: “I could say I have gotten tired of watching this clip for the 99th time, but I’d be lying.” I have so much disdain for the “Hollywood Swells” who try to use their fame to influence elections that I love seeing them with mud on their collective faces. Readers who want to see the clip again should click HERE.




• • • • •


June 18th

Hi Bill,

A friend emailed me this picture last week, which I assumed was photo-shopped and therefore a spoof.


But when I fact checked its authenticity I discovered it was real. Our Commander in Chief did in fact salute North Korea's defense chief, General No Kwang-chol, during his meeting with Kim Jong-un in Singapore last week. It appeared as part of a 42-minute propaganda video created by the North Korean state-media with multiple showings nationwide on their government controlled television network. The purpose of the video was to tout the prowess and respect shown to their Supreme Leader Kim Jong-un, and its country's military elite, by President Trump. Of course this salute brought a strong rebuke from South Koreans since technically the two countries are still at war with each other.

Mr. Trump’s salute also quickly resulted in rebukes by a number of our former military command officers including Army Major General Paul D. Eaton (Ret), who responded to this act saying, “It is wholly inappropriate for the Commander in Chief of our armed forces to salute the military of our adversary, especially one which is responsible for a regime of terror, murder and unspeakable horror against its own people. We must talk with them, for the sake of avoiding a disastrous war. But they have not earned the salute of a president.”

Here is an article about the incident from the Military Times publican: (Click HERE)

President Trump has significantly changed his public remarks and attitude about Kim Jong-un. A year ago President Trump began calling him "Little Rocket Man" and condemned what he called his "brutal regime" describing him as a "madman" after the death of American student Otto Warmbier who had been imprisoned during a visit to North Korea. Last September addressing the UN's general assembly our president stated, "No one has shown more contempt for other nations and for the well-being of their own people than the depraved regime in North Korea. It is responsible for the starvation deaths of millions of North Koreans, and for the imprisonment, torture, killing and oppression of countless more."

The U.N. has labeled No. Korea as one of the most repressive authoritarian states in the world, and our State Department recently issued a report estimating that Kim Jong-un has imprisoned, tortured or executed over 120,000 of his people, mostly Christians, for the act of engaging in religious practices.  

Over the last two months however, President Trump has made these and other public statements or tweets about Kim Jong-un:
“How many young guys — he was like 26 or 25 when his father died — take over these tough generals, and all of a sudden ... he goes in, he takes over, and he’s the boss. It's incredible. He wiped out the uncle, he wiped out this one, that one.”  The later part referring to his ordered execution two years ago of his uncle, along with all of his uncle's family members including the children, on the charge of treachery.

Kim Jong-un has been a "rough guy, a smart, man who loves his people." When pressed about how he could love his people based on his rule, Trump responded that, “He's doing what he's seen done."

Prior to the meeting President Trump said he would be "honored" to meet with Kim Jong-un. Immediately following the summit meeting he stated, "Well he is very talented. Anybody who takes over a situation like he did at 26 years of age and is able to run it, and run it tough — I don't say he was nice or I don't say anything about it. He ran it, few people at that age. You can take 1 out of 10,000 could not do it.” Adding that, "he has a very good personality, he’s funny, and he’s very, very smart.”

And his latest, “He’s the head of a country, he’s the strong head, don’t let anyone think anything different. He speaks and his people sit up at attention. I want my people to do the same.” He later told a reporter he was being sarcastic with this last sentence.

Middle Ground
<middleground5050@gmail.com>


SAY "HI" TO THE JUNE BIRTHDAY BOYS WHO WERE PRESENT AT LAST NIGHT'S PBA MEETING

 

They included George Payton; Chaplain Jim Becknall; John Shaver; Tom
Anthony; Rob Robison; and Pete Graves. (Photo by Aubrey “Bird” Parrott)

 

 

STILL TIME TO ENTER THE GUN RAFFLE






FINAL CALL FOR THE KKC BARBECUE — IT'S NEXT WEDNESDAY



ON CHARLES…



On Charles Krauthammer, My Friend, Mentor and Lodestar

By Marc A. Thiessen — Washington Post Columnist



Mercury News — June 16, 2018


WASHINGTON » A few years ago, I was talking with Charles Krauthammer in the Fox News green room when news that someone famous had died flashed on the TV. Charles told me the way he hoped to go when his time came. His dream, he said, was to be assassinated during the seventh-inning stretch at a game at Nationals Park. He wanted to die in what he once called “my own private paradise,” where “the twilight’s gleaming, the popcorn’s popping, the kids’re romping and everyone’s happy.”

Alas, fate has different plans. Charles’ announcement that he has only a few weeks to live is heartbreaking. But in writing it, he gave all who love and admire him s wonderful gift — the opportunity to tell him what he means to us and how he changed our lives.

Charles was the first person I turned to for advice when I was asked to write a weekly column for The Washington Post. I did not know him at the time. I had long admired his work from afar. I’d seen him speak in 2004, when I was a young Pentagon speechwriter.

Charles delivered an enthralling lecture, which, to this day, is the best expression I have ever heard of America’s role in the world. Unlike Rome or Britain or other classical empires, he said, Americans do not hunger for territory. “We like it here. … We like our football. We like our rock ’n’ roll. We’ve got the Grand Canyon and Graceland. … We’ve got everything.”

We are not an imperial power, Charles said, but a commercial republic that, “by pure accident of history, has been designated custodian of the international system.” How to meet those responsibilities? Charles systematically took apart the competing schools of foreign policy and in their place, Charles offered what he called democratic realism, which “sees as the engine of history not the will to power, but the will to freedom.” America, he said, “will support democracy everywhere, but we will commit blood and treasure only in places where there is a strategic necessity.” Put another way, he said, we will intervene “where it counts.” Germany and Japan counted. So did the Soviet Union. So does the battle against Islamic totalitarianism.

I realized that night: That’s not only what I think; that’s how I want to think. I want to be like Charles Krauthammer.

A few years later, when I asked his advice for my new Post column, Charles invited me to his office. What a thrill to finally meet him in person! He was exactly as I expected: gracious, funny and kind. He shared with me how he wrote his columns. And then he gave me one last piece of advice. “One day, they are going to ask you to write two columns a week,” he said. “Don’t do it. No one can write two good columns a week.” I followed his advice … until this year. (Sorry, Charles.) In the years that followed, I was blessed to spend countless hours with Charles waiting to go on the air at Fox News, talking about everything from conservative philosophy to the rise of President Trump. Charles is so brilliant, so immersed in the debate, that he has never needed to prepare very much. One day, I asked him what his topic was. “I have no idea,” he said with a twinkle in his eye.

I had to spend hours preparing to be half as good as Charles. I’m still working on it. Even before I knew him, he was my lodestar — and he always will be.

Marc Thiessen is a Washington Post columnist.



HOW HARD CAN IT BE TO FLY A HELICOPTER?



Click HERE to view the one-minute clip of a guy
who just purchased this helicopter and thought
he could fly it without instructions.

When I ran across the 10-year-old video above about a guy who had purchased a helicopter and assumed he wouldn’t need any lessons in order to fly it, I sent the 1-minute clip to Russ Jones thinking he might like to see it. Russ, who flew choppers in Vietnam before joining the SJPD, wrote back and directed me to his Facebook page and an article he wrote and posted back in March. As many of you are aware, Russ is a published author. His book, “Honorable Intentions” isn’t just about his experience as a combat helicopter pilot in Vietnam, it's also about his experience as a San Jose cop, a narcotics detective and a DEA task force officer. (The book is available on Amazon.)


We found Russ’ story about learning to fly a helicopter a fun and interesting read. It was posted by Russ on his Facebook page on March 18, 2018...




Is it Hard to Fly a Helicopter?


I’m celebrating 50 years since graduation from military flight school, and I’m often asked that question.

In 1967, having driven cars for several years and recently licensed in fixed wing aircraft, I boldly thought that with a few minutes of orientation I’d be able take the controls of one of these amazing machines. Of course had I tried, I would have immediately crashed, burned, and died. I would, however, have received an interesting obituary notice in the newspaper.

If you’re going to learn to fly helicopters, remember that even after hours of training you will want somebody sitting right next to you who actually knows how to fly the helicopter and can snatch the controls away from you. Because the truth is that helicopters are nothing at all like cars or airplanes. Cars and planes work because of basic scientific principles that everybody understands, such as parallel parking and gliding. Scientists, however, still have no idea what keeps a helicopter, with all its moving parts working in opposition to each other, in the air. The consensus is, "Something could come apart at any moment, and then you’ll crash, burn, and die."

Don’t take my word for it, just look in the eyes of old pilots. Airplane pilots are clear eyed, buoyant extroverts while old chopper pilots are brooding introspective anticipators of trouble. They know that if something bad hasn’t happened, it’s about to.

Fifty-one years ago I stood at a small heliport at Fort Wolters in Mineral Wells, Texas, about to take my first helicopter lesson. Before I went into the Army I thought this would be a good idea. I thought it’d be cool, after the Army, to be a pilot who flies as a radio reporter over the San Francisco Bay Area during rush hour so I could alert drivers to traffic problems. "Happy commuting everyone, this is Russell in Sky One, traffic on the bridges is moving along nicely, but you might want to steer clear of Highway 101. We have a three-mile backup on the interstate due to an overturned truckload of condoms.”

My assigned instructor, a civilian who contracted with the Army, probably flew Sopwith Camels in WWI. His flight suit, three sizes too large for his frail body, had all kinds of patches indicating death heads, bullets, fists holding bolts of lighting, and the Ace of Spades. An instructor today would probably be wearing some innocuous patch with something like “Whirly Boys,” but I digress.


I began having severe doubts when I saw my helicopter. Training choppers in 1967 were nothing like today's machines with turbine engines, hydraulics, computer-assisted controls, and automatic pilot. This was a small helicopter. I had flown a similar one fifteen years before outside the grocery market; my Dad would insert a dime and I’d go up and down, up and down. I knew that if we got airborne in a helicopter this size in Texas, some larger insects could very well attempt to mate with us.

The engine, about the size in my Vespa scooter, powered pulleys for eight rubber bands that turned the rotor blades. I noticed the seat on the right side had little holes gnawed through the fabric, just big enough to slip my finger into. Also, this helicopter had no doors. I know for a fact that all our leading U.S. airlines, despite often being bankrupt, maintain a strict safety policy of having doors on their aircraft.

"Don't we need a larger helicopter?" I ask. "With doors?"

“What?” he says. Before I could ask again he says, “Get in.”

You don’t defy a direct order from someone who probably fought in the Civil War.

In the helicopter, he explains the controls to me over the headset, but there's static, the engine is making a lot of noise, and the helicopter is rattling like a tin can full of screws.

". . . your collective (something)," he says. "This is your throttle on the end of (something), and cyclic and (something)..."

“What?” I say.

"(mumble) give you the controls when we reach 500 feet," he says.

“Give me WHAT? I say.

But my instructor cannot hear. He moves a control thing and WHOOAAA we’re off the ground, hovering, and WHOOOAAAA we’re shooting up in the air, and there are still no doors on this helicopter. I think I hear one of those rubber band things snap.

Now he tells me to take the main control “thing.”

Let me offer some advice here: If anybody tries to give you the main control “thing,” take Nancy Reagan’s advice: Just Say No!

He instructs: "You don't need hardly any pressure to . . ."

“AIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.......”

"That’s too much pressure," he says.

Now I am flying the helicopter. I AM FLYING THE HELICOPTER, at least with just the main control “thing.” I’m flying it by not moving a single body part, for fear of jiggling the control “thing.” I don’t even think about moving the control “thing.” I look like a statue of George Washington crossing the Delaware River, only more rigid.

"Make a right turn," he yells.

I gingerly moved the control “thing” one zillionth of an inch to the right and the helicopter LEANS WAY OVER TOWARD MY SIDE AND THERE IS STILL NO DOOR HERE AND I’M GONNA FALL OUT. I instantly moved the “thing” one zillionth of an inch back.

"I'm not turning right," I inform him.

“What?” he says.

"Only left turns," I emphatically tell him. When you've been flying helicopters as long as I have, you know your limits. Besides, if anyone is gonna fall out of their open door, I think it should be him. (Note: Sometimes you don’t think clear when you’re scared out of your wits.)

After a while it becomes clear to my instructor that if he continues to allow the Washington statue to pilot the helicopter, we are going to wind up crossing the Guadalupe River, eventually running out of fuel over Laredo. So he takes the control “thing” back. That is the good news. The bad news is, he's now saying something about demonstrating an "emergency procedure."

"When your engine dies," he says, "you do an auto-rotation. Do you like Amusement Park rides?" he asks as he cuts power to the engine.

I say: "No, I DOOOOOOOOOOOOO . . ."

When you lose power in a helicopter, it does not gently glide like a small airplane, giving the pilot time to call out his emergency and pick out a nice field or road to crash on and walk away from. Suddenly we are plummeting out of the sky at about the same speed and aerodynamic stability as that of a forklift dropped from a bomber. I’m looking straight down as the earth is approaching at terminal velocity. I see coyotes, rabbits, lizards, scorpions scattering in all directions to get out of the way of the impending impact. My stomach, however, is still at 500 feet. I’m trying to hold on with everything I have, and I feel that orifice in my butt chewing another hole in the seat.

Just before being embedded fifteen feet deep into Texas soil, my instructor suddenly pulls back on the “thing.”

“AAAHHHHIIIEEEE,” I scream as I hear another rubber band thingy break. I’m now looking up at the clouds where we just dropped out of the sky from.

He suddenly levels us out, pulls up on the “something” collective till it’s embedded in his arm pit, I think I hear another rubber band let go, and suddenly we’re quietly and safely on the ground.

He looks at me and grins.

“I’M GONNA FRIGGIN KILL YOU,” I yell.

“What?” he says.

Before I can carry out my desperate act of self-preservation, he decides to complete my training for the day by having me hover the helicopter.

Let’s get this straight right now. You can’t hover a helicopter. The idea is to hang over one spot on the ground. I’m using an area approximately the size of west Texas. I’m swooping around sideways and backward like a drunken bumblebee. We sweep through Abilene and then I think I see Ft. Worth pass below. I arc up to a hundred feet while spinning, and then plunge back down while whirling the other direction. If I were trying to rescue a person from the roof of a 100-story burning building, the person would realize that it would be safer to simply jump. Even my instructor looks nervous as he grabs the controls now and then to keep us from crashing, burning and dying.

So I’m very happy when we finally get back on the ground—back on the ground at the heliport with the engine off.

“I think we better check those rubber bands,” I say.

“What?” he says. “You did great, we’ll go back up tomorrow.”

“Sounds like a fun idea,” I say. I was lying. I was thinking how maybe I could just get assigned to permanent KP duty.

I did fly again that next day, and the next, graduating 50 years ago from US Army Aviation School.

I wouldn’t do it any different today.



CW2 Russell Jones, Aircraft Commander, around
Feb. 1969, two weeks before his last mission.


 

March 7, 1969: Last mission, over 50 bullet holes in aircraft.
Every crew member and passenger wounded except co-pilot
and crew chief. In spite of damage and personal wounds, I flew
out of LZ with 5 more wounded soldiers than we went in for.

Russ can be contacted at <rjones1502@yahoo.com> if there are any questions or comments.

 

REMEMBERING THE CANARY ISLANDS AIRPLANE DISASTER


I recently gave a shout-out to Allec Joshua Ibay for his YouTube channel in which he recreates and documents aviation crashes and other mishaps. He was the one who produced the video in last week’s Farsider about the tragic death of Navy Lt. Kara “Revlon” Hultgreen when an engine on her F-14A Tomcat malfunctioned while she was attempting to land on the USS Abraham Lincoln off the coast of San Diego during training maneuvers.

One of the dozens of other fatal airplane accidents Allec has recreated was the collision of the Pan Am and KLM 747s at Tenerife on the Canary Islands that took the lives of 583 people back on March 27, 1977. Everyone aboard the KLM 747 perished while most of those aboard the Pan Am jet died, including former San Jose City Manager Dutch Hammond (1950-69) and his wife Frances who were also on board the flight.

Of the many documentaries about this tragedy that can be found on the Internet, Allec’s recreation of the collision is the most recent and arguably the most detailed. It can be seen HERE.


One of the passengers on the Pan American jet who survived was David Alexander. He is a personal friend of Leroy’s who I have had the opportunity to meet and talk with about what has been dubbed the “Crash of the Century.” After viewing Allec’s video, I sent the link to Leroy and asked him to forward it to David. As it turned out, he had not seen this version of the accident. After viewing, he posted the message below to Allec via the YouTube comments section.

If this has piqued your interest, you might want to click on the link in David’s comment below and visit his website. And while you are there, check out the book he authored about the disaster that is on Amazon.

 

David Alexander


Allec: I recently saw your video and realized it is a very recent creation with the addition of the news of the passing of Pan Am First Officer Bob Bragg. I am very familiar with this accident as I am a survivor! I am 1 of 75 initial survivors and in a subgroup of 14 walking survivors, In addition, I was 1 of 2 photographers that Sunday afternoon.

Almost 3 years ago I released a book about my experience and more titled "Never Wait for the Fire Truck" by David Yeager Alexander. My book is available on Amazon. I recently commissioned a website to help market my book which is:
<www.canaryislandscrash.com> My website has a link to Amazon and has most of my pictures (published without my permission in Europe). Click on Picture Gallery on the top right.

Allec, take a look at the black and white picture of the planes on the ground before we taxied out. We on Pan Am were parked parallel to KLM which was to our right and ahead of us. I shot this from the top of a stairway at the left front door. Note their wingtip. Unless they moved after this photo, they were not crossways in front of us. Alex, I give you permission to use that and any other photos of mine on my website in an updated YouTube video. I just ask that you add my website address and the book cover photo to your video. I have found that there is a lot of confusion on the part of the public about how this accident happened. That is partly why I wrote this book. Your video(s) help to clarify the truth. Thank you for your work!



STORIES OF THE WEEK

School Teacher Arrested at JFK



From the Archives (modified)


A public school teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy International Airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a set square, a slide rule, and a calculator. At a morning press conference, Attorney General Jeff Sessions said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-gebra movement. He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction.

"Al-gebra is a problem for us," Sessions said. "They desire solutions by means and extremes, and they sometimes go off on tangents in a search of absolute value. They use secret code names like 'x' and  'y' and refer to themselves as 'unknowns,' but we have determined they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country. As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, 'There are 3 sides to every triangle.' "

When asked to comment on the arrest, President Trump said, "If God had wanted us to have better Weapons of Math Instruction, he would have given us more fingers and toes." House Speaker Paul Ryan and Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell told reporters they could not recall a more intelligent or profound statement by the President.  

• • • • •

 

Canada's Immigration Problem



From the Archives (modified)


A flood of American liberals sneaking across the border into Canada has intensified over the past 18 months, sparking calls for increased patrols to stop the illegal immigration. The Trump/Pence election prompted the exodus among left-leaning American citizens who fear they will soon be required to pray and agree with Sean Hannity. Canadian border farmers say it's not uncommon to see dozens of sociology professors, animal rights activists, members of the Hollywood community and Unitarians crossing their fields at night.
 
"I went out to milk the cows the other day and there was a Hollywood producer huddled in the barn," said Manitoba farmer Red Greenfield, whose acreage borders North Dakota. The producer was cold, exhausted and hungry. "He asked me if I could spare a latte and some free-range chicken. When I said I didn't have any, he left. Didn't even get a chance to show him my screenplay, eh?"
 
In an effort to stop the illegal aliens, Prime Minister Justin Trudeau has erected higher fences, but the liberals managed to scale them. So he tried installing speakers that blare Rush Limbaugh across the fields. "Not real effective," Trudeau said. "The liberals still got through, and Rush annoyed the cows so much they wouldn't give milk."

Officials are particularly concerned about smugglers who meet liberals near the Canadian border, pack them into Volvo station wagons, drive them across the border and leave them to fend for themselves.
 
"A lot of these people are not prepared for rugged conditions," an Ontario border patrolman said. "I found one carload without a drop of drinking water. "They did have two bottles of a nice little Napa Valley Cabernet, though."
 
When liberals are caught, they are sent back across the border, often wailing loudly that they fear retribution from conservatives. Rumors have been circulating about the Trump administration establishing re-education camps in which liberals will be forced to learn how to shoot a firearm, deny evolution, and act out drills preparing them for the Rapture.
 
In recent days, liberals have turned to sometimes-ingenious ways of crossing the border. Some have taken to posing as senior citizens on bus trips to buy cheap Canadian prescription drugs. After catching a half-dozen young vegans disguised in powdered wigs, Canadian immigration authorities began stopping buses and quizzing the supposed senior-citizen passengers on Perry Como and Rosemary Clooney hits to prove they were alive in the '50s. "If they can't identify the accordion player on The Lawrence Welk Show, we get suspicious about their age," an official said.

Canadian citizens have complained that the illegal immigrants are creating an organic-broccoli shortage and renting all the good Susan Sarandon movies.
 
"I feel sorry for American liberals, but the Canadian economy just can't support them," an Ottawa resident said. "How many tree huggers, vegans and Hollywood elites can our sparsely populated country hold?"

• • • • •

 

Financial News You Can Use



From the Archives


While the economy is going pretty well, smart investors may want to keep an eye on some anticipated mergers. For those of you who still have some money to invest, being aware of the next expected mergers can get you in on the ground floor and possibly make you a ton of dough. Watch for the following consolidations between now and the end of the year:

* Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush, and W R. Grace Co. will merge and become "Hale, Mary, Fuller, Grace."

* Polygram Records, Warner Bros., and Zesta Crackers will join forces and become "Poly, Warner Cracker."

* 3M will merge with Goodyear and become "MMMGood."

* Zippo Manufacturing, Audi Motors, Dofasco, and Dakota Mining will merge and become "ZipAudiDoDa."

* FedEx is expected to join its competitor UPS and become "FedUP."

* Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers are expected to merge and become "Farewell Honeychild."

* Grey Poupon and Docker Pants are expected to become a single company with the name "PouponPants."

* Knotts Berry Farm and the National Organization of Women will get together and be known as "Knott NOW."

And finally...

* Victoria's Secret and Smith & Wesson are going to merge under the new name "TittyTittyBangBang."
 

THE BEST OF THE LATE NITE JOKES

—Reruns excluded—

June 13 — 19


June 13: President Trump attacked Robert De Niro as someone who's "received too many hits to the head by real boxers." It was part of Trump's speech entitled "I Don’t Understand How Movies Work."

A new report says that this past year was a record-breaking year for Americans giving to charities. In fact, just yesterday, President Trump gave away South Korea.

AT&T was cleared to purchase Time Warner, which technically makes AT&T my new boss. So I just want to say two things: First, this news will in no way affect the content of my program. And two, T-Mobile sucks.

The Detroit Zoo announced it is sending 11,000 tadpoles to Puerto Rico to help restore their native toad population. A grateful Puerto Rico said, "Thanks, but could you send some electricity instead?"

The owner of the famous Bunny Ranch brothel won the primary for the Nevada state legislature. He won on his strong record of hiring women.

On Tuesday, a cow named Char won the "sexiest cow in Britain" award. Don’t worry, the organizers of the contest have been arrested.

June 14: Microsoft is working on technology that removes the need for cashiers and checkout lines. This cutting-edge technology is known as "shoplifting."

President Trump said Russia should not be punished for seizing parts of Ukraine because they speak Russian there. Which explains why today, Mexico announced plans to take back California.

Today is President Trump's 72nd birthday. Trump spent a quiet evening with loved ones, then Melania stopped by.

It's President Trump's birthday. Trump had some cake, ate some ice cream, played golf, and then he remembered it was his birthday.


June 13: Here in California, there will be a literally divisive measure on the ballot in November that, if it passes, would separate our state into three different parts. It's called the Cal-3 plan. It would divide California into three parts. I think the three are the part that smokes weed, the part that smokes meat, and the part that smokes meth.

And each of the three new states would get their own Kardashian, just to be fair.

I know we're underrepresented in the Senate, but instead of going through a long and acrimonious political process, why not just wait for the earthquake to split the state up?

We are thankful that our president, President Donald Trump, arrived home this morning from Singapore. Here he is getting off Air Force One. [Video clip of Trump] No tie. No MAGA hat. I'm not sure that even IS Donald Trump. Is it possible the North Koreans replaced him with a look-alike? And if so, great, thank you.

The president took a victory lap on Twitter this morning, basking in the glow of his lovefest with Kim Jong Un. He's feeling very good about himself. I counted: As of 4 o’clock this afternoon, he had 14 straight tweets with an exclamation point at the end.

Despite the president's proclamations, many critics are complaining that North Korea didn't commit to anything. They signed a vague promise to denuclearize, similar to those they've made and broken many times before. Here's the thing: Come on, does this look like a guy who would go back on his word? [Picture of Kim Jong Un] If you can't trust THAT face, that’s YOUR problem.

Kim Jong Un is getting rid of his nukes the same way Donald Trump is building his wall. They're not.

Kim Jong Un has reportedly accepted the president's invitation to visit the White House. Just think about that for a second. An evil dictator who kills his own family is invited to the White House; the Golden State Warriors are not.

A federal judge yesterday approved the $85 billion merger between AT&T and Time Warner, despite the Trump administration's efforts to block it. AT&T executives said they need to get into content creation and distribution in order to survive against technology companies like Amazon and Netflix. Another way to survive would be to fix your cellphone service, you know.

Now that the merger has been approved, you can now wait at home all afternoon for your cable to get installed by the same technician who missed your morning phone service installation.

The new company will be called AT&T Warner. Not Time Warner; they're getting rid of “Time.” Not the word time, the actual measurement of passing events. That's how powerful this company will be. I think they'll [also] be eliminating distance and space.

And it's exciting. Who would have thought two giant companies that met on Tinder would end up together?

June 14: 72 years ago today in the borough of Queens, in the state of New York, a pumpkin got trapped in a tanning bed. And Donald J. Trump was born.

Today is President Trump's birthday. Last year, first lady Melania Trump wished her husband a happy birthday on Twitter; she posted “Happy Birthday, Mr. President” with little heart emojis. So this year, she posted nothing. Gee, I wonder why that is. Although she did give him a card. This is the card: “Happy birthday, you'll never find me.”

You know, true love means never having to be in the same room together. So happy birthday, Mr. President.

This is the day Mueller should have served the subpoena, right? On his birthday. Maybe with a candle on it.

The president didn't get a subpoena today, at least not from Robert Mueller. He did get a fresh new lawsuit filed against him. The New York attorney general filed suit against Donald Trump, Eric Trump, Ivanka Trump, and Donald Trump Jr. for persistently illegal conduct by the Trump Foundation, their charity organization. The suit alleges that the Trumps misused their nonprofit to pay business debts and campaign expenses, which is not allowed. The attorney general says Trump's kids were collecting money despite doing no discernible work for it — which, in fairness to them, that's what they do, that's their job. They collect money in exchange for being born.

The board of directors for the charity hadn't even met in 19 years. Trump himself hadn't made a contribution to his own foundation, the Trump Foundation, in 10 years. Most foundations of this type are supported almost entirely by the person they're named after. It's important to remember, though, this foundation isn't the foundation he puts on his face every morning. That is made of melted crayons and marmalade. This is a different thing.

Of course Trump is denying the charges. I guess we'll see. I don't know — I kind of feel like if you saw the words "Donald Trump charity" and gave money, you deserve whatever you get.

Back in Washington, another Team Trumper may be on the way out. According to CBS News, White House press secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders is planning her escape from Witch-Hunt Mountain.

She says she's not going anywhere, which of course means she's most certainly going somewhere. She tweeted: “Does CBS news know something I don't about my plans and my future? They ran a story without even talking to me. I love my job and I'm honored to work for POTUS.” Definitely leaving, right?

The president is taking heat because of footage released by the North Korean state media in which Trump salutes a North Korean general during his honeymoon getaway with Kim Jong Un. The reason that's a big deal is because the president, as commander in chief, is only supposed to salute OUR military. Not other people's militaries. You get the idea Donald Trump would salute a plate of General Tso's chicken.

Saturday I will be in Houston, Texas, to play a one-on-one game of basketball against Senator Ted Cruz. This came about after I compared him to a blobfish while he was at a Rockets game. So he challenged me to play. I guess he misses being humiliated by other men since he stopped running for president.

The rest of the world was focused on day one of the World Cup. Even if you don't follow soccer, the World Cup is a chance to see some of the greatest athletes on the planet fall down and grab their shins for no reason over and over again.

June 18: This is the last show before we head off to do a week of shows in London. I've got to say, we're going at the exact right time because meteorologists are saying that this could be London's hottest June on record. They say it's going to get so hot in London, Coldplay is changing their name to Hotplay.

Some meteorologists are worried that London could be so hot this summer that Leonardo DiCaprio will try to have sex with it. That's how hot it is.

Today was Donald Trump's birthday. President Trump turned 72 today. It was a wonderful birthday, he was surrounded by all of his loved ones. And Eric Trump.

Trump celebrated with a small group of close friends. He said it was great. He said it was just like his inauguration.

The state of Vermont is trying to get people to move into their state and to sweeten the deal they're now offering each new resident up to $10,000. This is great because up until now, the most popular way to become a Vermont resident was through the witness protection program.

$10,000 to live in a state that's nothing but snowboarding, Ben & Jerry's ice cream, and marijuana. Did you hear that? That's the sound of every recent college graduate moving to Vermont.

A New York man is suing the pharmacy CVS for revealing to his wife that he had a prescription for Viagra. During the court hearing, the judge told the man to “please rise.” He said, “Dude, I’m way ahead of you.”

June 19: President Trump is continuing to blame Democrats for his new zero-tolerance immigration policy that has taken thousands of children from their parents and forced them into the detention centers. Even with a hell storm of criticism coming his way from Republicans and Democrats alike, the president is digging in — as he does — he keeps saying there's a law requiring him to do this. Which, first of all, no, there isn't, that's complete B.S. Secondly, since when did Donald Trump start caring about the law?

There's also a law against starting a fake university, but that's different.

Trump said Democrats want illegal immigrants to "infest" our country. He used the word "infest." Like his German grandfather infested our country. No job, no English. He crawled in on his stomach and infested the country with a bunch of Trumps.

This is not a popular policy — 67% of Americans oppose it. Even Melania released a statement saying she hates to see families separated. Partly because it makes her jealous. “Why can't I get separated?”
 
The president is very clearly, no matter what he says, using these children to try to get his wall funded. And here's the thing: If Trump wants to use kids as negotiating tools, the kids he should use are Eric and Donald Jr. They seem to be enormous tools. They are tools that wouldn't even fit in the box.

Meanwhile, the president's relationship with his chief of staff is on the rocks. John Kelly is reportedly so frustrated with Trump he stopped even trying to rein him in. Kelly reportedly has begun working out in the middle of the day and is said to be mentally checked out of his job. Just like Trump, except for the working-out part.

John Kelly also reportedly said he doesn't care if Trump gets impeached. You know, being Donald Trump's chief of staff is kind of like being his wife. You'll never see him, you have no control over what he does, and it's only a matter of time until he trades you in for a new one.


June 13: We have John Travolta on the show tonight. And this weekend is actually the 40th anniversary of the movie "Grease." To celebrate, President Trump and Kim Jong Un sang a duet of "You're the One That I Want."

Trump got back to the White House today. He walked through the doors and yelled, "I'm home!" — and then remembered he fired everyone.

Actually the people at the White House are pretty excited that Trump is back. Sarah Huckabee Sanders said, "Oh. Good." Melania Trump said, "Wait, he's back? Like, NOW?" And finally, the White House kitchen staff screamed, "Code red! Defrost the nuggets! Go, go, go! Go! Get me dinosaur-shaped, dinosaur-shaped!"

Trump is really excited to tell everyone about the summit. In an interview last night Trump talked about how he and Kim really hit it off — maybe a bit too much. [clip of Trump] "The relationship was really good. He’s got a very good personality, he’s funny. It’s been a very intense relationship. It’s been short, and very intense." Sounds like somebody’s going to the Fantasy Suite! It makes sense, though. Kim is totally Trump's type. He's foreign and half his age.

Here's some good news for the president: Tomorrow is his birthday. The White House is filled with balloons, champagne, and streamers. He was flattered until he realized it was all left over from the party the staff threw when he left for North Korea.

Tomorrow Trump turns 72. But he doesn't tweet a day over 12.

Today it was announced the U.S. will host the 2026 World Cup with Mexico. Players can either travel from the U.S. to Mexico by plane or just walk past the wall that still won't be built.

Uber is working out a new feature that can tell if you're drunk when you request a ride. Here is how it works: If it's 2 a.m. and you call an Uber, you're drunk.

June 18: It was 90 degrees in New York City today. Yeah, you know it's bad when you get that dirty gust of wind from the subway and you go, "Ahh!"

This year, Americans spent around $15 billion on Father's Day. When dads thanked their kids for the gifts, the kids were like, "No problem, I ordered them using your Amazon account.”

The Trump administration is facing criticism for separating immigrant children from their parents. Some people said they couldn't believe Trump would do something like this. Then African-Americans, Muslims, DACA recipients, transgendered troops, and special Olympians were like, "WE can."

The Trump administration is separating immigrant kids from their parents at the border, but experts say there's an easy fix to the problem — the midterms.

A lot of people are upset about this. Even Melania Trump came out against her husband — this is real — her office released a statement that said, "Mrs. Trump hates to see children separated from their families." Then it said, "However, Mrs. Trump is totally OK with wives being separated from their husbands."

A marijuana company in Los Angeles just sold a joint that's three feet long. And this is very thoughtful, they even included a little guide explaining what happens when you smoke a three-foot joint. After six inches, you call the supermarket to ask why peanut butter doesn't come in sticks like regular butter. After a foot, you realize you're talking into your wallet instead of your phone. After a foot and a half, you try to plug your wallet in so that you can call the supermarket and get to the bottom of this peanut butter thing.  After two feet, you realize you've stuffed your wallet into a jar of peanut butter. After two and a half feet, you bring your peanut-buttered wallet to the Apple Store to get repaired. And after three feet, the guy working at the Genius Bar says, "Mr. Rogen, this is a Sephora."

June 19: We're in the middle of a giant heat wave here in New York City. Today on the sidewalk, people were like, "I really hope that drip was from an air conditioner. I mean really — you never know."

Today at the White House, President Trump welcomed Spain's King Felipe and Queen Letizia. Or as he put it, "Welcome King Philip and Queen Latifah."

The king and queen of Spain visited Washington. When Trump first heard people speaking Spanish in the White House, he frantically pressed the silent alarm button under his desk.

I think Trump was a little confused when the king asked him if he wanted to go to a tapas bar. Trump was like, "Yes, just don't tell Melania. Is it totally topless?”

Today, officials from 22 states demanded that Trump stop separating immigrant families. Yep, 22 states. When Trump heard that, he was like, "Crap, that's every state."


June 13: California will vote a proposal this fall that would split the state into three pieces. They’ll be called California, Northern California, and Sad Thin People.

Scientists in Germany have programmed a robot to hug humans due to research showing hugs can reduce stress and help stave off illness. Which is the most German reaction to that news. “Oh, you need a hug? Come here — let me build you a robot. Ze robot vill hug you now.”

The Cheesecake Factory has been fined $4.6 million for wage violations with their janitorial staff. And now to save money they have to remove the last 40 pages of their menu.

According to CNN, over 800 people in Central Florida were stung by jellyfish this week. “I’m on my way!!” said R. Kelly.

June 14: Today is President Trump's 72nd birthday. Everyone in the White House hid to jump out and yell "Surprise," and while they were hiding they were like, "Hey, we found Melania!"

At one point the staff brought out a piñata for Trump but the president just deported it.

In November, people in California will vote on whether they want to break the state up in to three smaller states. The states would be Northern California, Southern California, and Kardashistan.

This Sunday is Father's Day. With the big day coming up, a lot of people are shopping for the perfect Father's Day card, and while there are lots of good choices, there are also some very unpopular cards out there. For example, this card says, "Dad, you taught me everything I know." Open up, it says, "That's why I'm so messed up." This next one says, "This Father's Day, I'm giving you something you'll love." Open it up: "I promise not to touch the thermostat." And finally this one says, "You're my best friend, my inspiration, and my hero." Open it up: "But I'm still not coming over to reset the Wi-Fi."

Applebee's is offering $1 Long Island iced teas for the entire month of June. So if someone tells you they just spent $20 at Applebee's, get them to a hospital.

June 18: A federal judge in Virginia revoked former Trump campaign chairman Paul Manafort’s bail on Friday and sent him to jail while he awaits trial. Jail — or as it will soon be known, “Trump 2020 Re-Election Headquarters.”

An Ohio man was recently arrested after attacking his roommate with a rolling pin. And I find it amazing that two male roommates actually owned a rolling pin.

A baby who was born in Paris on a public train today received free rides from the transportation company until his 25th birthday. While a baby born on the New York City subway received hepatitis.

June 19: Homeland Security Secretary Kirstjen Nielsen yesterday dismissed demands that President Trump unilaterally end the practice of separating families at the border, and said, "Congress can fix this tomorrow." Really? Have you MET Congress? They're still finalizing the Louisiana Purchase.

President Trump tweeted today, "If you don't have borders, you don't have a country." And if you don't have a country, you can't have a president. So, we did it, we got rid of him.

President Trump today spoke to the National Federation of Independent Businesses. Am I crazy or is he just making up fake organizations to speak to because he's afraid to talk to actual voters? "Oh, you hate me because of my immigration policies? Funny, because the League of Women Fishermen said they'd love it if I spoke at their Birthday Flounder Fest."

According to Politico, White House chief of staff John Kelly has been going to the gym in the middle of the day. Well, that's one sure way to not run into the boss.

President Trump repeated his false statement today that crime is up in Germany and said the numbers may appear lower because officials don't want to report the crimes. Dude, you want us to believe you've been poring over secret unreleased German crime statistics? You haven't even read your own autobiography.

Today was the 40th anniversary of the first "Garfield" comic strip, so from one guy making fun of a fat lazy oOrange narcissist to another, congratulations.
 


June 13: According to a new article, President Trump has a habit of ripping up official documents when he is done with them. And because there's a legal requirement to preserve presidential records, White House staffers then have to piece the documents back together with Scotch tape. It's been a lot of work. They've already had to put the Constitution back together three times.

You start out dreaming of working in the White House, you're like, "I want to experience all that excitement while getting to serve my country." And you end up like a kid on a rainy family vacation. "Ooh, I've got a corner piece! Guys, we've almost got the whole border done!"

This week SpaceX and Tesla founder Elon Musk personally handed out his latest and greatest new product to the first 1,000 customers who bought them online. And that product is… a flamethrower! This is something we were all crying out for. I mean, this is one way to get your neighbor to stop using a leaf blower at 7 a.m.

To get around existing laws, Elon Musk is calling the product Not a Flamethrower. Which is a great idea. I'm excited to use one of these "not a flamethrowers" to "not rob a liquor store."

Domino's Pizza announced this week that as part of a publicity campaign, the company will start to fill potholes in select towns across the country. Yes, yes, Domino's will be filling potholes — not to be confused with their normal job of filling potheads.

Seeing as it's Domino's, the asphalt is going to look like regular asphalt, but it's going to taste a little bit worse.

The crayon company Crayola has launched a new line of makeup based on its crayon colors. People who've tried the Crayola makeup say the colors are great, but they did have trouble staying inside the lines.

Crayola says their new line of makeup is completely vegan. Wait, so are you telling me the makeup I've been eating has meat in it?

June 14: This is the last show before we head off to do a week of shows in London. I've got to say, we're going at the exact right time because meteorologists are saying that this could be London's hottest June on record. They say it's going to get so hot in London, Coldplay is changing their name to Hotplay.

Some meteorologists are worried that London could be so hot this summer that Leonardo DiCaprio will try to have sex with it. That's how hot it is.

Today was Donald Trump's birthday. President Trump turned 72 today. It was a wonderful birthday, he was surrounded by all of his loved ones. And Eric Trump.

Trump celebrated with a small group of close friends. He said it was great. He said it was just like his inauguration.

The state of Vermont is trying to get people to move into their state and to sweeten the deal they're now offering each new resident up to $10,000. This is great because up until now, the most popular way to become a Vermont resident was through the witness protection program.

$10,000 to live in a state that's nothing but snowboarding, Ben & Jerry's ice cream, and marijuana. Did you hear that? That's the sound of every recent college graduate moving to Vermont.

A New York man is suing the pharmacy CVS for revealing to his wife that he had a prescription for Viagra. During the court hearing, the judge told the man to “please rise.” He said, “Dude, I’m way ahead of you.”


June 13: There is huge news in the Mueller investigation. Sources say that ex-Trump lawyer Michael Cohen is likely to cooperate with federal prosecutors. Yes, Michael Cohen is going to sing like a canary — which is ironic [picture of Trump’s hair and canary with tufted crest], because it's Trump that looks like one.

The first sign that Cohen is about to flip is that his lawyers are “not expected to work with him going forward” and “replacements for the lawyers have not been named.” Hmm, he should hire my guest tonight, Michael Avenatti. I hear the last lawyer to go up against him is about to get arrested.

This must be a shock to Donald Trump because it comes at a critical time, because sources say Mueller is wrapping up his obstruction of justice investigation — or, as one of them put it, “It’s going to hit the fan pretty soon.” I did not know there was a fan in Donald Trump’s pants. Because that’s where it’s gonna be hitting.

One former White House official said that even before the news that Cohen was cooperating broke, "Trump should be super worried about Michael Cohen. If anyone can blow up Trump, it's him." Well, OK, that gives Cohen leverage, because the last guy who threatened to blow up Trump got his own summit.

You know Trump didn't see this coming, because after Cohen's office was raided back in April, he tweeted, "Michael is a businessman for his own account/lawyer who I have always liked and respected. Most people will flip if the government lets them out of trouble, even if it means lying or making up stories. Sorry, I don't see Michael doing that." Sorry, I just heard he DID.

Now, there's still hope for Trump. A person close to Cohen says he hasn't flipped yet. "He's sending up a smoke signal to Trump: I need help." And that smoke signal's not a metaphor. Their pants are literally on fire.

So the question is, will Donald Trump pardon Michael Cohen? Maybe, maybe not. Because sources say, "Trump has been fuming about Cohen in private, blaming him for the messy Stormy Daniels situation." [Trump impression] “Why did Michael make me have sex with that woman? And why did he allow me to be alone with her during ‘Shark Week’? He knows it gets my juices flowing. I'm in a feeding frenzy."

This Cohen news really took the bounce out of Trump's North Korea victory lap. This morning, Trump made a bold claim, tweeting, "Just landed — a long trip, but everybody can now feel much safer than the day I took office. There is no longer a nuclear threat from North Korea." OK, granted, I have never felt less safe than the day you took office, but — and it's a big but — you didn't get anything in writing from Kim, and experts say, "The nuclear threat from North Korea is far from over." But a little reality never stopped Trump from getting his tweet on.

Trump then tweeted: "Before taking office, people were assuming that we were going to war with North Korea. President Obama said that North Korea was our biggest and most dangerous problem. No longer — sleep well tonight!" What do you mean, "sleep well"? You didn't change anything. It's like a lion got loose in our house, and you took a selfie with it, and then said, "Everything's fine. The lion and I have great chemistry. Sleep tight. Here, wear this lucky ham. Love you, baby. You'll be fine."

Trump announced that he was going to halt the joint military exercises with South Korea and the U.S., but that came as a shock to our close allies, South Korea and the U.S. In fact, a spokesperson for South Korea said, "At this moment, the meaning and intention of President Trump's remarks requires more clear understanding." Which is Korean for "Whaaaa!?"

Meanwhile, "American troops said they are still moving ahead with a military exercise this fall, until they receive guidance otherwise from the chain of command." OK, that's very important. I think the chain of command now goes: Trump; Ivanka; Dennis Rodman; Ivanka again; Jared's wife Ivanka; "Fox & Friends."


WEEKLY SNOPES URBAN LEGEND UPDATE



Click HERE for what’s new.

 




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My brother-in-law remembers The Catch starring Joe and Dwight. Do you? Clicking HERE will take you back 36 years to that magic moment at Candlestick with comments by the late Dwight Clark and Joe Montana. (3:26)




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If the details in this clip received from Mike Thompson are based on fact, it might be wise to familiarize any future grandchildren you may have with the Koran. The good news is, I spent nearly 20 minutes trying to vet this video, but couldn’t. Whether you believe what’s presented or not is YOUR call. Me? I won’t be around, so… (6:11)




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Have you ever heard of Pony Play? I hadn’t until a reader who shall remain nameless told me to click on this YouTube link. (I’m not providing his name because I don’t want anyone to think he is into this sort of KINK.) You go girl. GIDDY-UP. (2:09)




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Think the woman in that Pony Play clip above was a little strange? Brace yourself, because you ain’t seen nuthin’ yet! Seems that these fun-loving folks back in New Orleans enjoy taking Pony Play to the extreme. Mount up and have a look at THIS clip. (4:16)




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Attention ladies...






This clip from Bruce Fair shows of an off-duty police woman (possibly in Brazil) taking down an armed gunman. It is highly unlikely you will see this on the news here in the US, possibly because the mainstream media is afraid it might encourage more gun ownership. Yes, the video was posted by RT, which is funded by the Russian government. But so what? Have a LOOK anyway. (0:49)




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Fans of firearms take notice: HERE is a video titled “Seven Most Powerful and Dangerous Pistols of All Time” that you may find both interesting and entertaining.(10:02)




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Here are more crosswind landings and take offs that probably made the passengers wish they had taken the train. Or WALKED! (7:18)




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This excerpt from the BBC Earth series narrated by Sir David Attenborough features some of the most amazing footage ever captured on camera, and the outcome is equally amazing, so you need to watch ALL of it to understand why. (4:16)




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When the three little surviving chicks from the entry above grow up might they aspire to march in this Geese Parade in Belgium? Anything is possible. After all, they survived a fall off a cliff that would kill most species. (By the way, does that drummer at the rear look familiar? Remove the red ball from his nose and I could SWEAR I’ve seen him before.) (0:39)




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If you are both an environmentalist and a member of the Audubon Society, here is an issue that will be difficult for you to resolve. Watch THIS clip and you will understand the question. (2:27)




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There is another green energy device that is killing birds, especially our large birds of prey: Windmills. This is a new wind turbine designed to perform well in low-wind conditions but also to slow itself down in high-winds, thus preventing it from catching on fire or ripping apart like those huge windmills like you see on the Altamont. Have a LOOK. (3:08)




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With such a stunning discovery, why isn't this in the news?






This clip received from Mike Thompson is titled “Daily life in Cambodia.” We think it should be retitled to read, “Kids, take the motorbike and go out and FETCH dinner.” (5:15)




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In this clip, Stanley Roberts of KRON’s People Behaving Badly series rode with a CHP officer who had to deal with a so-called Sovereign Citizen who claimed she was IMMUNE from the law. (2:46)







If this trick has you stumped and you want to know how the New York magician controls the Card Man, you will find the ANSWER in the comment section with a link to Snopes. (1:30)




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This 10th Anniversary Hope for Paws rescue story involving Eldad and Loreta is about a Poodle whose mouth had been badly burned with acid. The pooch was in extremely poor shape overall, but some badly needed medical care and loving turned Alice’s situation completely around. Click HERE to watch the amazing transformation. (6:05)




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Eldad and Lisa responded and rescued a dog that was so exhausted that Eldad was able to sneak up and trap him with a net. A short time later PJ’s life had CHANGED dramatically for the better. (3:52)




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While Eldad was working another rescue, Lisa and a friend joined forces to rescue a pair of dogs that were living in a recycling plant. Lisa named the pair Salami and Pastrami. Click HERE to watch the rescue. (4:22)




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Gary Leonard sent in this amazing clip that shows the impact fourteen wolves had on Yellowstone in 1995 when they were reintroduced into the national park. Click HERE to witness the power of Mother Nature. (2:18)




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Who says you can’t train cats? Not Bruce Morton, that’s for sure. He’s the one who sent in THIS act from America’s Got Talent that even has Simon Cowell smiling. (4:58)




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I’m the first to admit that I have been to very few of the animated features on the big screen lately. Searching my memory, it’s possible that the last one I saw was “Snow White and the Severn Dwarfs.” Having said that, I was so impressed by the detail and colors in THIS animated race pitting a good locomotive against an evil locomotive that it was a lock for the Farsider. Click HERE and see what you think. (4:44)



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Speaking of steam locomotives, last week we took a short ride with Rikki. This week we are in the cab again watching her “highball” Engine 15 down the rails to the Hwy 6 crossing. Listen for the WHISTLE. (1:55)




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If ever there was a living example of the cliché “Don’t judge a book by its cover,” this contestant on America’s Got Talent would certainly be in the running for a Top Ten position. Check out THIS shy 13-year-old girl. (5;12)




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Damn that Pete Guerin! He knew I’m a huge fan of Postmodern Jukebox and their rendition of “All About the Bass,” and he thought it would be fun to send me an email saying he and his wife scored tickets to see them live at the Mountain Winery last night. Had I known a day earlier, I would have donned my Cherokee duds and performed a rain dance so I could "rain on Pete's parade" at the outdoor Mountain Winery. All I can do now is enjoy the video of the group and its signature song in the Farsider again for the THIRD time in the past year. (P.S. I saw the blonde first so I'm calling dibs!) (4:14)

 

That is how Pete and Yolanda would have had to dress for last night's performance at
the outdoor Mountain Winery if I'd had the opportunity to do my Cherokee rain dance!

 


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What better way to close this week’s Farsider than with a salute to the start of summer? THIS is a Summer Splash Bikini Flashmob direct from Vienna, Austria. (You can bet the girls with the strapless tops won't make that mistake again!) (3:25)




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Auf Wiedersehen



Pic of the Week




THE FARSIDER SUBSCRIPTION ROSTER as of 6/21/18

Additions and changes since the last published update (alphabetical by last name):

Dave North — Address change

To receive the email address of anyone on the list -- or to receive the roster with all of the email addresses -- send your request to
<bilmat@comcast.net>.



Abram, Fred & Connie
Adams, Gene
Ady, Bruce
Agerbeek, Bob
Agerbeek, Rudy
Aguilar, David
Aguirre, Jim
Albericci, Jerry
Alberts, Dick
Alcantar, Ernie
Alfano, Phil
Alford, Mike
Aligo, Cyndi
Allbright, Bill
Allen, Bob
Allen, Chaplain Bryan
Alvarado, Marie
Alvarez, Pat (Campbell)
Amaral, Mike
Anders, Alberta
Anderson, Jim
Anderson, Mark
Anderson, Sharon
Anthony, Tom
Antoine, Steve
Antonowicz, Germaine
Appleby, Judy
Arata, Jennifer
Arca, Rich
Archie, Dan
Avery, Rod
Babiarz, Maryanne
Babineau, Dave & Cheryl
Bacigalupi, David
Bailey, Rich
Baker, Beth
Balesano, Bob
Balesteri, Lou
Banner, Ken
Barikmo, Jon
Bariteau, John
Barnes, Steve
Barker, Ken
Barnett, Brad
Baroff, Stan
Barranco, Rich
Barrera, Ray
Bartels, Don
Bartholomew, Dave
Bartoldo, Tom
Basilio, Les
Bastida, Maggie
Bates, Tom
Battaglia, Nick
Battaglia, Will
Baxter, Jack
Bayer, Lance
Bayers, Dennis
Beams, Bob
Beattie, George
Becerra, Manny
Beck, Brian
Beck, Tom
Becknall, Jim
Beckwith, Tony
Beiderman, Margie
Belcher, Steve
Bell, Bob
Bell, Mark
Bell, Mike
Belleci, Ron
Beltran, Phil
Belveal, Chuck
Bence, Martin
Bennert, Brian
Bennett, Joy
Bennett, Mark
Berggren, Heidi
Bergtholdt, Doug
Bernardo, Guy
Bettencourt, Ed
Bevis, Sherry
Biebel, Phil
Bielecki, Mike
Binder, Andrew
Biskup, Shelley
Blackmore, Chuck
Blackstock, Carroll
Blank, Craig
Boales, Tina
Boes, Judith
Boggess, Eileen
Boggess, Mike
Bonetti, Jon
Borbons, Carl
Bosco, Al
Botar, Rick
Bowen, Gordy
Bowman, Mike
Boyd, Pat
Boyles, John
Brahm, Bob
Brandon, Hayward
Bray, Mary Ellen
Brewer, Tom
Brickell, Maryann
Bridgen, Betty Ruth
Bridgen, Dave
Brocato, Dom
Brookins, Dennis
Brooks, Bob
Brown Jr., Bill
Brown, Charlie
Brown, Dennis
Brown, Ernie
Brown, Marilyn
Brown, Ricky
Brown, Terry
Browning, Bob
Brua, Dale
Buckhout, Craig
Bullock, April
Bullock, Dan
Bulygo, Mary
Burke, Karol
Burke, Ryan
Burns, Barbara
Burroughs, (Bronson) Utta
Busch, Dennis
Bye, Bud
Byers, David
Bytheway, Glenn
Caddell, Jim
Cadenasso, Richard
Caldarulo, Wendy
Calderon, Richard
Caldwell, Phyllis
Camara, Bob
Camarena, Raul
Campbell, Jason
Campbell, John
Campbell, Larry
Campos, John
Cannell, Tom
Caragher, Ed
Caraway, Steve
Card, Christine
Cardin, Randy
Cardone, Lloyd
Cardoza, Vic
Carlin, David
Carlsen, Laura
Carlton, Jim
Caro, Bert
Caro, Lynne
Carr Jr., John
Carr, John
Carraher, Don
Carraher, Jim
Carrillo, Jaci Cordes
Carrillo, John
Carter, Ernie
Cassidy, Kevin
Cates, Dean
Cavallaro, Dave
Cedeno, Rey
Chalmers, JC
Chamness, Hank
Chapel, Ivan
Chavez, Ruben
Chevalier, Brian
Chewey, Bob
Christian, Brian
Christiansen, Bob
Christiansen, Rich
Christie, Kenn
Clark, Bill (the one who stayed)
Clark, Bill
Clark, Kevin
Clayton, Dave
Clear, Jennifer
Clifton, Craig
Clough, Mark
Coates, Marisa
Cobarruviaz, Lou
Coen, Roger
Colombo, Tony
Comelli, Ivan
Como, John
Confer, Rick
Connor, Stephanie
Connors, Kim
Conrad, Mark
Conroy, Mike
Contreras, Dee
Conway, Ed
Cook, John
Cook, Paul
Cooke, Bertie
Coppom, Dave
Cordes, Marilyn
Cornfield, Scott
Cortez, Darrell
Cossey, Neil
Costa, Mike
Cotterall, Doug
Cottrell, Keith
Couser, Rich
Cripe, Rodger
Crowell, Chuck
Culwell, Ken
Cunningham, Stan
D'Arcy, Steve
Dailey, Karen
Daley, Brian
Daly, Ron
Damon, Alan
Damon, Veronica
Daniels, Jim
Daniels, Rodney
Daulton, Rich
Daulton, Zita
Davis, Bud
Davis, Joan
Davis, Mike
Davis, Rob
Day, Jack
Deaton, Caroll
DeBoard, Joe
DeGeorge, Bob
Deitschman, Tracy
DeLaere, Sylvia
Delgado, Dave
DeMers, Buc
Dennis, Sandra
Destro, Mike
Destro, Tony
Devane, Dan
Devane, Joe
Dewey, Rod
Diaz, Mike
DiBari, Dave
DiVittorio, Gerrie
Dishman, Billy
Doherty, Janiece
Dolezal, Dennis
Dominguez, Bob
Dominguez, Frank
Dooley, Jeff
Dorsey, Ed
Dotzler, Jennifer
Dowdle, Mike
Doxie, Tara
DuClair, Jim
Dudding, Bill
Dudley, Bruce
Duey, Dennis
Dumas, Jerry
Dye, Allen
Dwyer, Jason
Dwyer, Pat
Earnshaw, Kathy
Earnshaw, Patrick
Edillo-Brown, Margie
Edwards, Derrek
Edwards, Don
Egan, Mike
Eisenberg, Terry
Ellner, Howard
Ellsworth, Larry
Embry (Howsmon), Eva
Erfurth, Bill
Erickson, Scott
Esparza, Dave
Esparza, Fred
Estrabao, Dario
Eubanks, Earl
Evans, Linda
Evans, Michael
Evans, Ron
Ewing, Chris
Ewing, Don
Ewing, Paul
Fagalde, Kevin
Fair, Bruce
Fairhurst, Dick
Fanucchi, Roscoe
Farlow, Paul
Farmer, Jack
Faron, Walt
Farrow, Chuck
Faulstich, Marge
Faulwetter, Stan
Faz, Dennis
Fehr, Mike
Ferdinandsen, Ed
Ferguson, Betty
Ferguson, Ken
Ferla, Al
Fernsworth, Larry
Flauding, Ken
Fleming, Joe
Flores, Phil
Flosi, Ed
Fong, Johnson
Fong, Richard
Fontanilla, Rick
Forbes, Jay
Foster, Rick
Foulkes [Duchon], Louise
Francois, Paul
Francois, Tom
Frazier, Rich
Freitas, Jordon
Fryslie, Kevin
Furnare, Claud
Gaines, Erin
Galea, Andy
Galios, Chris
Galios, Kathy
Gallagher, Steve
Garcia, Enrique
Garcia, Jose
Garcia, Lisa
Gardner, Paul
Garner, Ralph
Gaumont, Ron
Gay, Brian
Geary, Heide
Geer, Brian
Geiger, Rich
Gergurich, Judy
Giambrone, Jim
Gil-Blanco, Jorge
Giorgianni, Joe
Giuliodibari, Camille
Goings, Mark
Gomes, Rod
Gonzales, Gil
Gonzales, Jesse
Gonzalez, D. (formerly D. Avila)
Gonzalez, Frank
Gonzalez, Jorge
Gott, Pat
Graham, George
Grande, Carm
Grant, Bob
Grant, Doug
Grant, Rich
Granum, Jeff
Graves, Pete
Green, Chris
Grigg, Bruce
Griggs, Fran
Grimaldo, Linda
Grimes, Eric
Guarascio, Dan
Guerin, Pete
Guido, Jr., Jim
Guido, Sr. Jim
Guizar, Ruben
Gummow, Bob
Gummow, Rich
Gutierrez, Hector
Guzman, Dennis
Guzman, Kim
Gwillim, Reese
Habina, Ron
Hafley, Gary
Hahn, Chuck
Hale, Don
Handa, Mitch
Handforth, Terry
Hann, George
Hare, Caren (Carlisle)
Harnish, Mary (Craven)
Harpainter, Bob
Harris, Bucky
Harris, Diane
Harris, Don
Haskell, Marty
Hawkes, Ken
Haynes, Sandy
Hazen, Skip
Hedgpeth, Bob
Helder, Ron
Hellman, Marilyn
Hendrickson, Dave
Hendrix, Dave
Hernandez, Irma
Hernandez, Joe
Hernandez, Linda
Hernandez, Rudy
Hernandez, Vic
Herrick, Mike
Herrmann, Erma
Hewison, Jamie
Hewitt, Dave
Hilborn, Art
Hildebrandt, Karen
Hill, Sandra
Hinkle, John
Hippeli, Micki
Hirata, Gary
Hober, Dave
Hober, Margo
Hodgin, Bruce
Hoehn, Charlie
Hogate, Joanne
Hogate, Steve
Hollars, Bob
Holliday, Sandy
Hollingsworth, Larry
Holloway, Sandi
Holser, George
Honda, David
Hong, Bich-nga
Horton, Debbie (McIntyre)
Hoskin, Wendy
Hosmer, Dewey
Howard, Terri
Howell, Jim
Howsmon, (Jr.) Frank
Howsmon (Sr.), Frank
Hudson, Kim
Hughes, Gary
Hunter, Dick (via daughter Kim Mindling)
Hunter, Jeff
Husa, Sonia
Hyland, Brian
Ibarra, Miguel
Imobersteg, Rob
Inami, Steve & Francine
Ingraham, George
Ireland, Joe
Jackson, Curt
Jacksteit, Ken
Jacobson, Barbara
Janavice, Dean
Jeffers, Jim
Jenkins, Dave
Jensen, Dan
Jensen, Janie
Jewett, Donna
Jepson, Cliff
Jezo, Pat
Johnson, Bob
Johnson, Craig
Johnson, Cynthia
Johnson, Dave
Johnson, Gary
Johnson, Jon
Johnson, Karen
Johnson, Kyle
Johnson, Mardy
Johnson, Tom & Fran
Jones, Russ
Jones, Wayne
Kaminsky, Glenn
Katashima, Annie
Katz, Dan
Keneller, Dave
Kennedy, Scott
Kennedy, Tom
Kensit, John
Killen, Pat
Kimbrel, Tammy
Kinaga, Rose
King, Charlie
Kingsley, Fred
Kirby, Erwin
Kirkendall, Dave
Kischmischian, Gene
Klein, Lou Anna
Kleman, Karl
Knea, Tim
Kneis, Brian
Knopf, Dave
Kong, Ernie
Kosovilka, Bob
Kozlowski, Astrid
Kracht, John
Kregel, John
Kunesh, Cindy
Kurz, Jennifer
Lagergren, Fred
Lanctot, Noel
Laney, Tammy
Lansdowne, Sharon
Lara, Bill
LaRault, Gary
Larsen, Bill
Laverty, Ann
Lax, John
Leak, Felecia
Leavy, Bill
Leavey, Jack
LeGault, Anna
LeGault, Russ
Lem, Noland
Leonard, Gary
Leonard (Lintern), Lynda
Leong, Ken
Leroy, Jim
Lewis, Lefty
Lewis, Marv
Lewis, Steve
Lind, Eric
Linden, Larry  
Lisius, Jim
Little, Keith            
Livingstone, John
Lobach, Bob
Lockwood, Bob
Lockwood, Joan
Logan, Maureen
Longaker, Mary
Longoria, Noe
Lopez, Candy
Lopez. Dan
Lopez, Ruvi
Lovecchio, Pete
Low, John
Lu, Elba
Luca, Dennis
Lucarotti, Jim
Luna, Gloria
Lundberg, Larry
MacDougall, Joanne
Macias, Steven
Macris, Carly
Macris, Tom
Madison, Gary
Maehler, Mike
Mahan, Rick
Malatesta, Jim
Malcolm, Roger
Mallett, Bill
Malvini, Phil
Mamone, Joe
Marcotte, Steve
Marfia, John
Marfia, Ted
Marin, Julie
Marini, Ed
Marlo, Jack
Marsh, Scott
Martin, Brad
Martin, Lou
Martin, Todd
Martinelli, Ron
Martinez, Rick
Martinez, Victor
Matteoni, Charlotte
Mattos, Bill
Mattos, Paula
Mattocks, Mike
Mayo, Lorraine
Mayo, Toni
Mazzone, Tom
McCaffrey, Mike
McCain, Norm
McCall, George
McCall, Lani
McCarville, John
McCollum, Bob
McCollum, Daniele
McCready, Tom
McCulloch, Al
McCulloch, Scott
McDonald, Joey
McElvy, Mike
McFall, Ron
McFall, Tom
McGuffin, Rich
McGuire, Pat
McIninch, Mark
McKean, Bob
McKenzie, Dennis
McLucas, Mike
McMahon, Jim
McMahon, Ray
McNamara, Laurie
McTeague, Dan
Meheula, Cheryl
Mendez, Deborah
Mendez, Mike
Messier, Tom
Metcalfe, Dave
Metcalfe, Mickey
Miceli, Sharon
Miller, Keith
Miller, Shirley
Miller, Stan
Miller, Toni
Mills, Don
Miranda, Carlos
Mitchell, Carol
Modlin, Dick
Mogilefsky, Art
Moir, Bob
Monahan, Chris
Montano, Wil
Montes, José
Morales, Octavio
Moore, Dewey
Moore, Don
Moore, Jeff
Moore, JoAnn
Moorman, Jim
Morella, Ted
Moreno, Norma
Morgan, Dale
Morin, Jim
Morris, Jack
Morton, Bruce
Mosley, Joe
Mosunic, Taffy
Moudakas, Terry
Moura, Don
Mozley, Ron
Muldrow, Mark "Mo"
Mulholland, Kathy
Mullins, Harry
Mulloy, Dennis
Munks, Jeff
Munoz, Art
Murphy, Bob
Musser, Marilynn
Nagel, Michael
Nagengast, Carol
Nakai, Linda
Nalett, Bob
Namba, Bob
Nascimento, Mike
Nelson, Ed
Ngo, Phan
Nichols, John
Nichols, Mike
Nimitz, Stephanie
Nissila, Judy
Norling, Debbie
North, Dave
North, Jim
Norton, Peter
Norton, Phil
Nunes, John
Nunes, Les
O'Carroll, Diane (Azzarello)
O'Connor, Mike
O'Donnell, Tom
O'Keefe, Jim
Oliver, Pete
Ortega, Dan
Ortiz, Leanard
Otter, Larry
Ouimet, Jeff
Ozuna, George
Pacheco, Russ
Padilla, George
Pagan, Irma
Painchaud, Dave
Palsgrove, Ted
Panighetti, Paul
Papenfuhs, Steve
Paredes, Carlos
Parker, Rand
Parrott, Aubrey
Parsons, Dirk
Parsons, Mike
Pascoe, Brent
Passeau, Chris
Pate, Neal
Paxton, Bob
Payton, George
Pearce, Jim
Pearson, Sam
Pedroza, Frank
Peeler, Eleanor
Pegram, Larry
Pennington, Ron
Percelle, Ralph
Percival, John
Perry (Cervantez), Martha
Peterson, Bob
Phelps, Scott
Phillips, Gene
Piper, Will
Pitts, Ken
Pitts, Phil
Plinski, Leo
Pointer, John
Polanco, Mary
Polmanteer, Jim
Porter, John
Postier, Ken
Postier, Steve
Powers, Bill
Priddy, Loren
Princevalle, Roger
Pringle, Karl
Propst, Anamarie
Pryor, Steve
Punneo, Norm
Purser, Owen
Pyle, Leroy
Quayle, John
Quezada, Louis
Quinn, John
Quint, Karen
Ramirez, Manny
Ramirez, Roland
Ramirez, Victoria
Ramon, Chacha
Raposa, Rick
Rappe (Ryman), Bonnie
Rasmussen, Charlene
Ratliff, Fran
Raul, Gary
Raye, Bruce
Realyvasquez, Armando
Reed, Nancy
Reek, Rob
Reeves, Curt
Reid, Fred
Reinhardt, Stephanie
Reizner, Dick
Rendler, Will
Rettus, Bev
Retuta, Rene
Reuter, Larry
Reutlinger, Leslie
Reyes (Buell), Cindy
Reyes, Juan
Reyes, Mo
Rheinhardt, Bob
Rice, Jayme
Rice, Lyle
Richter, Darrel
Riedel, Gunther
Rimple, Randy
Roach, Jim
Roberts, Mike
Robertson, Harry
Robinson, Walt
Robison, Rob
Rodgers, Phil
Rogers, Lorrie
Romano, Bill
Romano, Marie
Rose, John
Ross, Joe
Ross, Mike
Rosso, Ron
Roy, Charlie
Royal, Julie
Ruiloba, Louie
Russell, Russ
Russell, Stan
Russo, Grace
Ruth, Leo
Ryan, Joe
Ryan, Larry
Saito, RIch
Salamida Joe
Salewsky, Bill
Salguero, Desiree
Salvi, Pete
Samsel, Dave
Sandoval, Thomas
Santos, Bill
Sauao, Dennis
Savage, Scott
Savala, john
Sawyer, Craig
Scanlan, Pete
Scannell, Dave
Schembri, Mike
Schenck, Joe
Schenini (Alvarez), Joanne
Schiller, Robert
Schmidt, Chuck
Schmidt, Paul
Schriefer, Randy
Seaman, Scott
Seck, Tom
Sekany, Greg
Seymour, Chuck
Seymour, Jim
Sharps, Betty
Shaver, John
Sheppard, Jeff
Sherman, Gordon
Sherr, Laurie
Shigemasa, Tom
Shuey, Craig
Shuman, John
Sides, Roger
Sills, Eric
Silva, Bill
Silveria, Linda
Silvers, Jim
Simpson, Terry
Sinclair, Bob
Sly, Sandi
Smith, Betty
Smith, BT
Smith, Craig
Smith, Ed
Smith, Jerry
Smith, Karen
Smith, Kerry
Smith, Mike
Smoke, Wil
Sorahan, Dennis
Spangenberg, Hal
Spence, Jim
Spicer, John
Spitze, Randy
Spoulos, Dave
Springer, George
Stauffer, Suzan
Stelzer, Rex
Sterner, Mike
Strickland, John
Sturdivant, Billy
Sugimoto, Rich
Suits, Jim
Summers, Bob
Sumner, Ted
Sun, Jeff
Sun, Wei
Suske, Joe
Swanson, Ray
Tanaka, Ken
Tarricone, Linda
Tate, Bill
Taves, Phil & Paula
Taylor, Joyce
Tenbrink, Bob
Tennant, Ed
Teren-Foster, Aileen
Terry, Glenn & Maggie
Thawley, Dave
Thayer, Dean
Theobald, Cynthia
Thomassin, Ron
Thomas, Art
Thompson, Gary
Thompson, Margie
Thompson, Mike
Tibaldi, Ernie
Tibbet, Walt
Tice, Stan
Tietgens, Dick
Tietgens, Don
Tomaino, Jim
Torres, John
Torres, Nestor
Torres, Ralph
Townsend, John
Townsend, Vicki
Tozer, Dave
Trapp, Greg
Trevino, Andy
Trujillo, Ted
Trussler, Christine
Trussler, John
Tush, Lorraine
Tyler, Diana
Unger, Bruce
Unland, Joe
Urban, Diane
Usoz, Steve
Valcazar, Dan
Vallecilla, Ernie & Peggy
Van Dyck, Lois
Vanegas, Anna
Vanek, John
Vasquez, Danny
Rich Vasquez
Vasquez, Ted
Vasta, Joe
Videan, Ed
Videan, Theresa
Vidmar, Mike
Vincent, Bill
Vinson, Jim
Vizzusi, Gilbert
Vizzusi, Mike
Vizzusi, Rich
Vizzusi, Tony
Waggoner, Bill
Wagner, Jim
Wagstaff, Greg
Wahl, John
Walker, Dave
Wall, Chuck
Ward, Jean
Watts, Bob
Way, Vicky
Webster, Ron
Wedlow, Dean
Weesner, Greg
Weir, Tony
Welker, Jessica
Wells, Bill
Wells, Brenda
Wells, Mike
Wendling, Boni
Wendling, Jay
Werkema, Jim
Weston, Tom
Wheatley, Tom
White, Rich
Wicker, Joe
Wiley, Bruce
Williams, Jodi
Williams [Durham], Lanette
Williams, Rick
Williamson, Kathleen
Williamson, Ken
Wilson, Caven
Wilson, Jeff
Wilson, Jerry
Wilson, Lee
Wilson, Neal
Wilson, Stan
Wilson, Tom
Windisch Jr., Steve
Wininger, Steve
Winter, Bill
Wirht, Kim
Witmer, Dave
Wittenberg, Jim
Wolfe, Jeff
Womack, Kenn
Wong, Andrew
Woo, Paul
Wood, Dave
Wood, Jim
Woodington, Brad
Wysuph, Dave
Yarbrough, Bill
Young, Mike
Younis, Tuck
Yuhas, Dick
Yules, Ken
Zalman, Ginny
Zanoni, Mike
Zaragoza, Phil
Zenahlik, Tom
Zimmerman, Eliza
Zwemke, Doug