The Farsider is an independent
publication that is not affiliated with the San Jose Police Benevolent
Assn. The SJPBA has allowed the Farsider to be included on its website solely for the convenience of
the retired San Jose Police community. The content of this newsletter does not represent or reflect
the views of the San Jose Police Benevolent Association's Board of Directors or its membership.
We are coming up to what marks one of our tragic, sad days here at the San Jose Police Department. Officer Michael Katherman, Badge Number 3900, was killed in the line of duty on June 14, 2016. It was a year ago to this day that we lost Mike and will forever be changed.
Your POA wants to allow us as a police family to come together yet again and honor him by sharing his stories and supporting his family and friends. We will open the POA hall next Wednesday, June 14th, at 4:30 PM. Light appetizers and drinks will be available to all of our police family and friends. If you cannot make this event, please take a moment on this day for Mike, and to wish his family and friends to stay strong.
Paul Kelly, President, SJPOA
SJ Earthquakes Law Enforcement Appreciation Night
Click HERE to buy your tickets online now.
If you would like more information about this great opportunity, please contact Colby Thompson at (408) 556-7769 or <firstname.lastname@example.org>. Please note: The POA does not have any further information about the tickets, tickets for sale, or tickets to reserve.
Dan Archie lost his "brother and best friend," Dick Archie. Dan is a good friend and I subsequently became good friends with Dick. Dan nursed his brother during his period of declining health. A tremendous loss for the Archie family, but especially for Dan.
I lost a brother way before his time, so I have a point of comparison as to what Dan is going through.
Pete (Guerin) <email@example.com>
Send a request to <firstname.lastname@example.org> or Pete for Dan’s email address if you wish to offer your condolences.
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I thought this picture would be good fodder for the Farsider. As some know, but many do not, Darrel Richter is moving to Minnesota. This picture is his going-away photo taken at the World Famous Sterling Cafe in Lincoln. Notables in the picture are Dave Samsel, Joe Vasta, Darrel, Tom Kennedy, Dan Bullock, me, Rick Confer and Bill Silva. Lots of war stories with this group!
Craig (Shuey) <email@example.com>
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Saw this on Facebook and thought it might resonate with many of your readers like it did with me.
Red State <firstname.lastname@example.org>
His first two comedy albums went Platinum three times over, and his comedy books are best sellers.
But Jeff Foxworthy is also a conservative and a patriot. He supports all that is great with America, and is tired of how the far left is ripping America apart.
President Barack Obama has changed America into an entitlement society, where people don’t want to work hard.
That’s why Jeff Foxworthy used Facebook to explain how he feels about the state our country is in.
If you can get arrested for hunting or fishing without a license, but not for entering and remaining in the country illegally — you might live in a nation that was founded by geniuses but is run by idiots.
If you have to get your parents’ permission to go on a field trip or to take an aspirin in school, but not to get an abortion — you might live in a nation that was founded by geniuses but is run by idiots.
If you MUST show your identification to board an airplane, cash a check, buy liquor, or check out a library book and rent a video, but not to vote for who runs the government — you might live in a nation that was founded by geniuses but is run by idiots.
If the government wants to prevent stable, law-abiding citizens from owning gun magazines that hold more than ten rounds, but gives twenty F-16 fighter jets to the crazy new leaders in Egypt — you might live in a nation that was founded by geniuses but is run by idiots.
If, in the nation’s largest city, you can buy two 16-ounce sodas, but not one 24-ounce soda, because 24-ounces of a sugary drink might make you fat — you might live in a nation that was founded by geniuses but is run by idiots.
If an 80-year-old woman who is confined to a wheelchair or a three-year-old girl can be strip-searched by the TSA at the airport, but a woman in a burka or a hijab is only subject to having her neck and head searched — you might live in a nation that was founded by geniuses but is run by idiots.
If your government believes that the best way to eradicate trillions of dollars of debt is to spend trillions more — you might live in a nation that was founded by geniuses but is run by idiots.
These comments make us laugh, but it’s also a sad statement of just how far America has fallen.
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Hope all is well with you. With all the terrorist attacks taking place over in the UK, I thought I would share this video about that “peaceful" religion, Islam. I have watched many episodes of Dr. David Wood who explains the religion with facts and the specific Quran chapters relating to the issue. Sometimes he can be a little sarcastic, but he is very intelligent and well informed. I know it’s not politically correct to bash another’s religion, but I think people need to become aware of what is happening today in our world. The link is below. I hope you can publish this in the Farsider.
Greg (Wagstaff) <email@example.com>
Since the term “politically correct” is not recognized in the Mail Call column, HERE is Greg’s video.
ARE YOU AN HONORABLY DISCHARGED MILITARY VETERAN?
Below is the text of an email we received from our in-house Navy specialist Don Hale. If you are an honorably discharged military veteran it may pay you to read it…
The Army, Air Force and Navy exchanges will start allowing all honorably discharged veterans to shop online, (no taxes). The target start date is Veterans Day, November 11, 2017, but you must register first. Registration begins June 1, 2017. You must call 1-844-868-8672 after June 1 to register.
Send this to your veteran friends and relatives. Here is the site with more information:
Ed. — If you want to take advantage of this program, bypass the above and follow these steps:
I called the number noted to ensure this was legitimate. It was. A recording instructs you to go to <https://www.vetverify.org/> to verify your eligibility. Clicking on that link brings up this page:
When you push the “Click Here To Begin Verification” box, this form comes up which must be filled out.
After you complete the form and push the Continue button, this form comes up:
The next page requires that you upload proof of your discharge (e.g. DD-214). I scanned mine and submitted it in the form of a JPEG. It was immediately received which generated this final page:
The text is the light blue box reads: "Thank you for uploading the file. You will be notified of the results of our review in 2-3 days."
I received the following email 24 hours later...
Thank you for applying to participate in the Veterans online shopping benefit. Congratulations! You have been verified and can begin shopping on November 11, 2017. The exchanges will keep you updated with important developments.
MARK YOUR CALENDAR FOR THIS YEAR’S KEITH KELLEY BARBECUE
LEAVE IT TO NEW YORKERS TO FIND A WORK-AROUND
Dogs Not Allowed On NYC Subways Unless They Are In A Carrier, So…
by James Gould-Bourn — Bored Panda <boredpanda.com>
The rules are clear when it comes to carrying animals on the New York subway. “No person may bring any animal on or into any conveyance or facility unless enclosed in a container.” But the rules say nothing about the size of the animal, and as you can see from the photos below, some people were quick to exploit that fact in order to avoid a fine.
STORIES OF THE WEEK
Meet “Sniffer” the best damn dog in the Drug Enforcement Administration
A man had just settled into his seat next to the window on the plane when another man sat down in the aisle seat and put his black Labrador retriever in the middle seat between the men.
The first man looked very quizzically at the dog and asked why it was allowed on the plane.
The second man explained that he was an agent with the Drug Enforcement Agency and that the dog was a “sniffing dog.”
"His name is Sniffer and he's the best there is,” said the agent. “I'll show you once we get airborne and I put him to work.”
The plane took off, and once it had leveled out the agent said, “Watch this,” then he told Sniffer to search.
Sniffer jumped down, walked along the aisle, and finally sat very purposefully next to a woman for several seconds. He then returned to his seat and put one paw on the agent's arm.
The agent said, “Good boy.” He turned to the man and said, “That woman is in possession of marijuana, I'm making a note of her seat number and the authorities will apprehend her when we land.”
“That's amazing,” said the first man.
Once again the agent sent Sniffer to search the aisle.
The lab sniffed about, sat down beside a man for a few seconds, then returned to its seat. This time he placed two paws on the agent's arm.
The agent said, “That man is carrying cocaine, so again, I'm making a note of his seat number for the police.”
“I’m very impressed,” said his seat mate.
The agent then told Sniffer to go search again.
Sniffer walked up and down the aisle for a little while, sat down for a moment, and then came racing back to the agent, jumped up and proceeded to poop on the seat.
The first man was really disgusted by this behavior and couldn't figure out how or why a well-trained dog would behave like that, so he asked the agent, “What's going on?”
The Agent nervously replied, “He just found a bomb.”
• • • • •
Breed and They Walk Among Us
Submitted by Russ Russell
Those of you who worry about Democrats versus Republicans -- relax, this is our real problem.
In a Purdue University classroom, students were discussing the qualifications to be President of the United States. It was pretty simple. The candidate must be a natural born citizen of at least 35 years of age.
However, one girl in the class immediately started in on how unfair it was of the requirement to be a natural born citizen. In short, her opinion was that this requirement prevented many capable individuals from becoming president. The class was taking it in and letting her rant, but hardly any jaws hit the floor when she wrapped up her argument by stating;
"What makes a natural born citizen any more qualified to lead this country than one born by C-section?"
Yep, these are the same students who are voting in our elections, and in some cases, getting elected to office!
• • • • •
A lawyer was driving around the courthouse in a sweat because he was scheduled to appear in court on behalf of his client and couldn't find a parking place. Looking up toward heaven, he said "Lord, take pity on me. If you find me a parking place I will go to Mass every Sunday for the rest of my life." Miraculously, a parking place appeared directly in front of him. The lawyer looked up again and said "Never mind. I found one."
• • • • •
Hard-of-hearing dog cure...
Our final story of the week involves a woman who realized her dog could hardly hear, so she took it to the veterinarian.
He found that the problem was hair in its ears. He cleaned both ears and the dog could hear fine. The vet then proceeded to tell the lady that if she wanted to keep this from reoccurring, she should go to the store and get some Nair hair remover and rub it in the dog's ears once a month.
The lady follows his advice and goes to the drug store where she picks up some Nair hair remover from the shelf.
At the register the druggist tells her: "If you're going to use this under your arms don't use deodorant for a few days."
The lady says: "I'm not using it under my arms."
The druggist says: "If you're using it on your legs don't shave for a couple of days."
The lady says: "I'm not using it on my legs either. If you must know, I'm using it on my Schnauzer."
The druggist says: "Then stay off your bicycle for a week."
THE BEST OF THE LATE NITE JOKES
June 1 -- 5
June 5: Last week, President Trump announced the United States will withdraw from the Paris climate agreement. Trump said he wants the entire country to be the same temperature as a Florida golf course.
Hillary Clinton’s running mate, Tim Kaine, tweeted that Trump is pulling out of it because he’s jealous of Obama. Then Kaine waited for one of his 25 followers to retweet him.
But to show its commitment to honoring the agreement, New York City lit up its buildings in green. Though if we’re really worried about the environment — how about we DON’T light up each of our buildings all night?
“Wonder Woman” made over $100 million at the box office this weekend, and beat “Captain Underpants.” But I think Captain Underpants is in denial — he’s been handing out electoral maps to show the theaters where he won.
Walmart is offering a new service where employees will deliver items to your house on their way home from work. Not only that — they’ll also deliver the items in a Target bag so your neighbors think you’re classy.
June 5: Today, 15 new features were revealed about the upcoming iPhone 8. The biggest new feature is the battery that only lasts until the announcement of the iPhone 9.
In Michigan, a Republican congressman said that God would “take care of” climate change. So now, a group of polar bears are on their way to “take care of” a Republican congressman in Michigan.
Several panelists on Fox News accused “Wonder Woman” of not being American enough because her costume isn’t red, white and blue. They’re also saying to really be American, it should be a double XL.
A new study claims that popular people may live longer than unpopular people. If that’s true, Shia LaBeouf died in 1982.
In protest of President Trump abandoning the Paris climate accord, the CEO of Disney has resigned from Trump’s business advisory council. It’s not a good sign when a company led by a giant talking mouse is telling the president to be more realistic.
The “Wonder Woman” movie shattered the glass ceiling, breaking $100 million in box office sales. In fact, the only way “Wonder Woman” could have done better is if she had campaigned in Wisconsin.
June 5: A Texas man went on a date to see “Guardians of the Galaxy 2,” and is now suing his date for texting during the movie. He thinks he can sue her for texting. Who does this man think he is — the guardian of the Samsung Galaxy?
The man said texting during a movie is “one of my biggest pet peeves.” Now, pet peeves are not what lawsuits are for. You don’t sue someone because they say expresso instead of espresso.
It’s going to make it very hard for him on future dates. It’s going to be like, “So how did your last relationship end?" And he will be like, “On an episode of ‘Judge Judy."
At a Walmart in Minnesota, a customer had to tackle a confused deer after it wandered into the store. The deer is fine and was released back into the wild, which makes this the happiest possible ending to a story of a deer walking into one of America’s largest suppliers of hunting rifles.
Walmart is already trying to capitalize on this by changing their slogan to “Walmart: Where You Can Always Save a Buck.”
June 1: President Trump rang in the 1st of June with a major announcement. No one loves to announce an announcement more than Donald Trump. On Twitter last night, he wrote, "I will be announcing my decision on Paris accord Thursday at 3:00 P.M., the White House Rose Garden, make America great again." It made sense that he did it from the Rose Garden. While we still have roses and gardens.
This deal that Trump backed out of, this is a deal that was signed by 194 other countries. The only two countries who are not part of the Paris accord, besides us, are Nicaragua and Syria. And they're doing great. I guess it's not a surprise, the fact that he pulled out. The president has been very big on pulling out ever since he had Donald Jr.
Meanwhile, I'm sure you know about covfefe at this point, right? So just after midnight yesterday the president wrote, "Despite the constant negative press covfefe." And that was it. And with that puzzling half-sentence, for a brief shining moment, Donald Trump made Twitter great again.
Twitter went absolutely berserk. Not since Phil Collins gave us the word "Susudio" has a nation been so utterly fascinated and perplexed. You know a typo is bad when even Melania is like, 'I'm pretty sure that's not English, Donald.' Even after Trump deleted the tweet, which he almost never does, Sean Spicer claimed it was intentional. He said it wasn't a typo or a stroke.
June 5: Did you watch the game last night? Turned out to be not so great this year. The Warriors clobbered the Cavaliers again. Beat them by 19 points. They won the first game by 22 points. I’m hoping the next few games are closer. If I wanted to see a bunch of blowouts I’d watch Fox News, folks.
You know how the Trump administration kept insisting that his travel ban wasn’t a travel ban? Well, at 6:25 this morning the president weighed in on that himself. He wrote, “People, the lawyers and the courts can call it whatever they want but I am calling it what we need, and what it is, a TRAVEL BAN.”
It’s like the last five minutes of an episode of “Law & Order: SVU” where the murderer tells Mariska Hargitay everything: “It was a travel ban all along.”
This has to be maddening for White House “stress secretary” Sean Spicer. This is a guy, he specifically went out in front of the press and insisted that this was not a travel ban. And now Trump is in all-caps saying it is a travel ban.
June 5: “Wonder Woman” made $100 million at the box office this weekend. Meanwhile, Wonder Man made $121 million for doing the same job.
A boy in Maryland this weekend was trapped in an arcade claw machine after climbing through the prize door. Luckily, rescuers were able to get him out after about 35 quarters.
Two Papa John’s employees in Washington State were arrested this week for allegedly delivering cocaine in pizza boxes. Authorities became suspicious when Papa John’s started getting five-star Yelp reviews that were 47 paragraphs long.
June 5: The White House announced today that they’re kicking off “Infrastructure Week.” It’s like Shark Week, except American infrastructure might actually kill you.
It started with Trump’s plan to turn the air traffic control functions of the FAA into a nonprofit corporation. Although, to be fair, any company Trump runs is eventually nonprofit.
I know this happened five days ago, but I will not be denied the chance to enjoy Trump’s tweet from just after midnight last Wednesday: “Despite the constant negative press covfefe.” OK. Strong statement. Bold. Presidential. Reminds of the first draft of the Gettysburg address: “Four score and seven ratselttab.”
Of course, the internet lost their covfefe over this. Why did the president type that? It was the new “What color is the dress?” But instead of “white versus blue,” it was “sleepy versus stroke.”
LOOKING FOR A BARGAIN?
On sale this week at Walmart...
Redneck Mini Blinds. No need to clean or dust
them. Just tear off and toss away as needed.
WEEKLY SNOPES URBAN LEGEND UPDATE
Click HERE for the most current update.
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Oops. I don’t think the public was supposed to see this clip of CNN staging protesters. It that was shot by a bystander and posted on YouTube THIS past Sunday, June 4th. (2:17)
This is what the viewers at home saw if they had tuned into CNN on the following day, June 5th. Note that THEY are the same people as in the staged video above. (3:21)
• • • • •
• • • • •
Nothing racist is intended by THIS observation, but we’re thinking it might be a good idea for a Muslim TSA agent working an airport to find a private place to pray to Allah. Just sayin’. (1:08)
• • • • •
Pete Guerin approved of this new Budweiser commercial. WATCH it and you will likely approve of it as well. (3:03)
• • • • •
If you thought the Japanese Bullet Train was impressive, check out THIS Japanese Bottle Train. (0:45)
• • • • •
Read and heed: Here is some good security advice from Russ Russell for those of YOU who want to thwart dishonest baggage handlers. (3:01)
And if you don’t think that theft from checked bags is a major problem, watch this short CNN video. (4:14)
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• • • • •
Burglars beware: The following was posted on the Vintage San Jose Police Facebook page by Ivano Comelli on May 29th...
“Caught on Candid Camera: Mail being delivered to Vintage San Jose Police Sgt. Jack Baxter's home in Monterey.”
The scary thing is that it looks like the hammer is cocked on what looks to be an S&W Model 66.
• • • • •
Here is a truly amazing demonstration of strength, flexibility and athletic skill. With nearly 3 million views, the languages in the comments show that THESE performers have enjoyed a world-wide audience outside of China. (5:35)
• • • • •
There’s not much we can add to this video beyond asking, “Are you prepared for the BIG ONE?”
• • • • •
• • • • •
Let’s spend a minute or two in Dutch Harbor (Alaska) and see if we can spot a rare symbol of American freedom, a/k/a a BALD EAGLE. (1:02)
Leave a box of fish in the back of your pick-up truck in Dutch Harbor and you will create a scene straight out of Hitchcock’s movie that turned BODEGA BAY into a town of horror. (“The Birds”) (2:36)
The clips above reminded us of this one we posted a few years ago. If you enjoyed feeding the ducks at a pond when you were a kid, you should love THIS. (2:00)
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If ever there was a video deserving of a place of honor as our closer of the week, this one received from Alice Murphy was a perfect selection. Click HERE and watch “One Life, One Flag, One Mile: A Summary of Project America Run II.” (6:21)
• • • • •
Pic of the Week
a guy with a warped sense of humor who likes
to play with people's heads. He painted this welcome
sign on the roof of his home which is under the
approach to the Milwaukee International Airport.
THE FARSIDER SUBSCRIPTION ROSTER as of 6/8/17
Additions and changes since the last published update (alphabetical by last name):
Craig Buckhout — Added
Darrel Richter — Address change
To receive the email address of anyone on the list -- or to receive the roster with all of the email addresses -- send your request to <firstname.lastname@example.org>.
Abram, Fred & Connie
Allen, Chaplain Bryan
Alvarez, Pat (Campbell)
Babineau, Dave & Cheryl
Bray, Mary Ellen
Bridgen, Betty Ruth
Brown Jr., Bill
Burroughs, (Bronson) Utta
Carr Jr., John
Carrillo, Jaci Cordes
Clark, Bill (the one who stayed)
Embry (Howsmon), Eva
Foulkes [Duchon], Louise
Gonzalez, D. (formerly D. Avila)
Guido, Jr., Jim
Guido, Sr. Jim
Hare, Caren (Carlisle)
Harnish, Mary (Craven)
Horton, Debbie (McIntyre)
Howsmon, (Jr.) Frank
Howsmon (Sr.), Frank
Hunter, Dick (via daughter Kim Mindling)
Inami, Steve & Francine
Johnson, Tom & Fran
Klein, Lou Anna
Leonard (Lintern), Lynda
Muldrow, Mark "Mo"
O'Carroll, Diane (Azzarello)
Perry (Cervantez), Martha
Rappe (Ryman), Bonnie
Reyes (Buell), Cindy
Schenini (Alvarez), Joanne
Taves, Phil & Paula
Terry, Glenn & Maggie
Vallecilla, Ernie & Peggy
Van Dyck, Lois
Williams [Durham], Lanette
Windisch Jr., Steve