April 30, 2015
Bill Mattos, Editor and Publisher
Leroy Pyle, Webmaster
The Farsider is an independent publication that is not
affiliated with the San Jose Police Benevolent
Assn. The SJPBA has allowed the Farsider to be included on its web site solely
for the convenience
of the retired San Jose Police community. The content of this newsletter does
not represent or reflect
the views of the San Jose Police Benevolent Association's Board of Directors or
HERE) donated two beautiful plaques to Michael
Johnson's family, one of which was displayed on his car
at the funeral service:
return their kindness by donating to their fundraiser.
The TV show COPS and Langley Productions is matching all
donations made, dollar for dollar, up to $30,000.
This fundraiser is key because the equipment they use is
being relocated to Washington state. The money raised
will go to purchase the equipment and supplies to keep
Hearts and Crosses running without missing a beat.
HERE to view their fundraising website.
And please share the fundraiser on Facebook by clicking
THE TRIALS & TRIBULATIONS OF SAN JOSE AND THE SJPD
Sunshine Sought on Internal Misconduct Issues
News — April 28, 2015
SAN JOSE —
The number of San Jose Police Department officers and
staff members reporting possible misconduct by their
colleagues bounced upward last year after plummeting to
a 10-year low.
While that suggests a trend toward more accountability
between members of the force, the city’s police watchdog
wants things to go a step further: Open up the books
more so the public can get a better idea of how well the
police are policing themselves.
LaDoris Cordell, who last week presented her final
annual report as San Jose’s independent police auditor,
is pushing for greater transparency in what are known as
SJPD publishes data summarizing the number and broad
categories of violations examined each year but nothing
specific about the kind of misbehavior being
investigated and how it lines up with any punishment
That is distinct from conduct complaints made by the
public, which are also investigated by the Internal
Affairs unit but eventually laid out in detail. Public
complaints are also reviewed and analyzed by the IPA
office, though the Police Department has final say over
“There is no justification whatsoever for why there
should be two different systems,” Cordell said. “With
more sunshine, if we’re not behaving well, it gets
Chief Larry Esquivel says it’s not that simple. Police
officers’ rights and privacy are protected by the
state’s Public Safety Officers Procedural Bill of Rights
Act. But he stands firm that his department handles
internal complaints against its officers the same as
those made by citizens. “I can guarantee you we treat
those the same: complete, thorough, objective and fair,”
The department-initiated investigation report tallies
how many complaints were received in a calendar year in
categories encompassing violations of procedure,
courtesy, conduct unbecoming an officer, neglect of
duty, discrimination, harassment, search and seizure,
and use of force. It also publishes how many cases were
sustained, or validated, and how many officers received
punishments on a spectrum ranging from training or
counseling to suspension, demotion and termination.
But the numbers, Cordell argues, do not reveal what the
officers did to draw scrutiny, and offer no way of
connecting the sustained cases to any of the punishments
to assess whether they were proportional.
“All you get is this handout. They should write another
report that summarizes every sustained allegation,”
Cordell said. “It can be sanitized. (Take) the names
out, we don’t want to embarrass anybody. But tell the
public: What did they do?”
Esquivel concedes the department could be more
forthcoming about finding patterns and trends within the
internal complaints. But he returns to the complications
of privacy, namely because of the numerical disparity
between the two kinds of complaints. Public conduct
complaints topped 300 in 2014, while
department-initiated complaints totaled 47, after
dipping to 13 the previous year.
The chief said the relatively low number of internal
complaints make it more difficult to protect officers’
confidentiality rights, especially within the department
“Those reports and summaries could be identifiable by
their peers; it won’t be hard to put two and two
together,” Esquivel said. “As opposed to a citizen
complaint, where the volume of those makes a pretty big
But there could be some room for compromise, said Raul
Peralez, a city councilman who was an SJPD officer until
his election to office last fall. He points out that the
formation of the IPA’s office was itself a compromise,
born out of a political battle between the city and
police union over the creation of a civilian police
“I don’t think it’s necessary, but I don’t think the
walls would crumble,” Peralez said. “They could work
together and make sure we’re doing it in a way that’s
safe and doesn’t affect privacy and livelihood.
“I think the majority would see that the department does
a good job of finding its own members in violation and
Esquivel echoed that point by noting that the department
sustains more than 70 percent of internal conduct
complaints, compared with about 10 percent for public
But for Cordell, that’s almost beside the point without
more explanation about what’s being examined in the
first place. She’s calling for independent oversight —
not necessarily by her office — over the process; the
chief says that department-initiated investigations are
already reviewed by the City Attorney’s Office and the
Office of Employee Relations.
Cordell adds that overt transparency is more important
than ever amid a growing national conversation over
police accountability in the wake of high-profile police
shootings of unarmed black men across the United States
in the past year.
“To say, ‘Just take our word for it’ or ‘Trust us,’
that’s wrong,” she said. “The events in this country
show that you cannot operate like that.”
• • • • •
News — April 26, 2015
Switches Lawyers; His Job May Be Gone
San Jose cop accused of raping a woman about to lose his
job? The city and police department won’t say, and he
remains on paid administrative leave.
But sources tell us officer Geoffrey Graves won’t be on
the force for much longer.
One telling sign that would seem to confirm those
rumors: Graves recently moved to have the court appoint
a government lawyer to replace his private attorney,
Darlene Bagley, who had been paid through a
legal-insurance policy funded by police union dues.
Graves said he couldn’t afford to continue to pay for
her services, which suggests he expects not to be
covered much longer through the union and Peace Officers
Research Association of California (PORAC) because he’ll
no longer be an officer.
Prosecutor Carlos Vega also has said during Graves’
recent preliminary hearing in Judge JoAnne McCracken’s
court that Graves is on the brink of being dismissed.
Graves could not be reached for comment. The switch of
lawyers comes after the alleged rape victim and one of
Graves’ former girlfriends (who is a SJPD dispatcher)
gave devastating testimony against him at his
preliminary hearing, prompting McCracken to hold him
over on more serious charges at Vega’s request and take
him into custody. Graves now faces a possible life
Internal Affairs is an offbeat look at state and
This week’s items were written by Aaron Kinney, Tracey
Kaplan, Jessica Calefati, Josh Richman and Paul Rogers.
Send tips to
email@example.com, or call
• • • • •
Must Have Public Drone Debate
Editorial — Mercury News — April 26, 2015
isn’t the only one these days worried about new forms of
government surveillance. Edward Snowden and the NSA made
sure of that.
The fallout makes it imperative that the San Jose City
Council publicly discuss and vote on the Police
Department’s policy for using the drone it purchased
last year without prior discussion in public.
The purchase appeared on a City Council consent calendar
in 2014 and was approved in a single yes or no vote with
reams of routine items requiring no discussion. It was a
blunder by the police and then-Mayor Chuck Reed and the
council, appearing to be an end run around the public to
give the police power to spy on them.
To its credit, the police department apologized and
started over, holding a number of public meetings since
November with the city Neighborhoods Commission. This
month it won the commission’s support for a one-year
pilot program approved by city staff allowing very
limited drone use, as a tool to assist the bomb disposal
unit and to assist in active shooter cases or situations
that are urgent and possibly life-threatening. The
policy next goes before the council’s Public Safety,
Finance & Strategic Support Committee, which will decide
whether the whole council should take up the debate.
Absolutely, it should. Officials directly accountable to
voters need to publicly take responsibility for the
policy and pass it as an ordinance. The police could
shore up public trust by joining that call. It will ease
people’s worries about accountability, transparency and
outside oversight issues.
There is no rush. Even the pilot can’t start until the
FAA approves a certificate of authorization on
nonmilitary drone use. Police say it could be two years.
Drones can be very useful for rescues and other
potentially life-saving work, but they also are easily
abused. Current and future police department leaders
need to know the mayor and council are watching.
The proposed pilot prohibits using the drone for general
surveillance, and police pledge to not archive pictures
or video it shoots. The device couldn’t be modified to
add weapons, communication jammers or other intrusive
Getting drones into beneficial use could have been
accelerated if Gov. Jerry Brown had had the good sense
to sign Assemblyman Jeff Gorell’s AB 1327 last year. It
would have provided clear direction for local law
enforcement agencies on appropriate use of drones. The
key provision made it illegal to use them to spy on
residents without a warrant, except under narrow,
Drone technology’s positive potential is equaled if not
exceeded by the potential for abuse. Public trust and
government accountability have to be prerequisites to
launching it. San Jose is close to having a good policy,
but it needs City Council accountability.
I double-dog dare you to publish this list of things I
trust more than Hillary Clinton:
• Mexican tap water
• A rattlesnake with a "pet me" sign
• OJ Simpson showing me his knife collection
• An elevator ride with Ray Rice
• Taking pills offered by Bill Cosby
• Michael Jackson's doctor
• An Obama Nuclear deal with Iran
• A Palestinian on a motorcycle
• Gas station sushi
• A Jimmy Carter economic plan
• Brian Williams news reports
• Obama's Birth Certificate
• Loch Ness monster sightings
• Prayers for peace from Al Sharpton
• A fart when I have diarrhea
P.S. If you accept my dare, also include this letter
from the Clintons to the IRS regarding the unreported
income to their foundation.
When your email showed up on Monday, TP, I felt it was a
little too partisan to include in the Farsider, but I
did send the list to a few dozen right-of-center folks
in my Personal Address Book who I knew would find the
humor in it. Over the next 48 hours, however, your
double-dog dare bugged me. That was when I realized that
while it only takes one ball to play baseball, football,
soccer, tennis or golf, it takes two to publish the list
and letter which could result in some hate mail from the
Hillary supporters. Que sera sera.
NEW RETIREES' NEWSLETTER NOW ON-LINE
latest electronic version of the Billy & Spanner is now
you to all who have agreed to receive the on-line
version of the newsletter.
read the newsletter by clicking
INTERESTED IN A MICHAEL JOHNSON MEMORIAL COIN?
proceeds to benefit the Johnson Family—
a direct link to Craig’s email address:
10th ANNUAL BOBBY BURROUGHS MEMBERSHIP FOLSOM BBQ
now taking sign-ups for our annual Association Folsom
BBQ and membership
Details are below. You can sign up on-line by clicking
need a count of Retirees and Spouses
be attending the BBQ, by May 14, 2015.
Baldwin Dam Rd.
Saturday, May 16, 2015
right after lunch.
or Chicken - Please make your selection when signing up.
I-80 in Roseville, CA
Douglas Blvd., east on Douglas Blvd. Go approximately
5.1 miles to Folsom Auburn Blvd. Turn right and go 4.1
miles to Oak Ave. in Folsom (there is a McDonalds fast
food on the corner). Turn right on Oak Ave. and go
approximately 0.4 miles (the road ends). Turn right on
Baldwin Dam Rd. You will see the Lew Howard Memorial
Park Arch. Go under the Arch and drive to the top of the
hill where the picnic grounds are (approximately 0.3
miles). You have arrived.
I-50 in Folsom
Folsom Rd. Exit. Take Folsom Rd. 2.4 miles and cross the
American River Bridge. At this time the road name
changes to Folsom Auburn Blvd. Continue 0.8 miles to Oak
Ave. You will see a McDonalds fast food restaurant on
the left corner. Turn left on Oak Ave. and go
approximately 0.4 miles to Baldwin Dam Rd. Turn right
and you will see the Lew Howard Memorial Park Arch.
Drive straight through to the top of the hill and you
IS GOOGLE ENDANGERING THE LIVES OF POLICE OFFICERS?
smartphone application Waze is being criticized for
endangering the lives of police officers after Ismaaiyl
Brinsley used the app to monitor the movements of police
officers in the days before he assassinated New York
police officers Rafael Ramos and Wenjian Liu last
December. The popular real-time traffic app alerts users
to the presence of police officers through its "traffic
cop" feature. Click
HERE for the video.
second video about the Waze app as well as a detailed
article about the threat it poses to law enforcement
NOT ALL OF THE IMAGES COMING OUT OF BALTIMORE ARE
you want about the problems in Baltimore, but at least
some of the local citizens are supporting the cops. In
the first pic below, citizens have formed a human shield
between the 'protestors' and the police, and in the
second photo a young boy is offering bottles of water to
THE BEST OF THE LATE NITE JOKES
Earth Day. Environmentalists spent the day drawing
attention to the Earth, while the Earth just spent the
day checking Facebook to see which planets wished it a
happy Earth Day.
Shouldn't every day be Earth Day? I mean, what are our
Marco Rubio's presidential campaign has raised $40
million in the last week. When he heard that, Rubio
said, “Hey, any chance I can drop out of the race and
just keep the 40 million?”
This week, Dr. Oz will respond to critics who believe he
should not be giving medical advice on his show. People
will be watching his response closely — especially Dr.
At the White House yesterday, a little girl actually
asked first lady Michelle Obama how old she is. Michelle
answered, "Old enough to put you on the No Fly List,
It’s being reported that Google spent over $5 million on
lobbying just during the first quarter of this year.
You’d think Google wouldn't really need to lobby
politicians. All they have to say is, “We have your
search history. Do what we tell you.”
New York Mayor Bill de Blasio has been positioning
himself to challenge Hillary Clinton for the Democratic
nomination. Hillary once developed a program to deliver
rural healthcare, while de Blasio once dropped a
groundhog on its head.
I read that many minor league baseball players have been
caught using steroids over the past few years. But
apparently, not ENOUGH steroids.
The royal baby is expected to arrive sometime this
weekend, and some people are actually camping outside
the hospital in hopes of seeing it. So if you want to be
the first to find out what the royal baby looks like,
just look at a photo of any baby.
According to a survey from the Physical Activity
Council, Americans are the least active they’ve been
since 2007. Some say it's because there's more
technology, while others say it's because winter now
lasts 11 months a year. It's snowing here a week before
That's right, Americans are more inactive than ever. To
which Netflix said, "You're welcome."
Miami Dolphins lineman A.J. Francis just tweeted that he
has signed up to be an Uber driver during the
off-season. But since he's with the Dolphins he can only
drive 15 yards before he has to punt.
In a two-hour interview last Friday, Bruce Jenner told
ABC's Diane Sawyer, “For all intents and purposes, I'm a
woman.” At which point, Joe Biden ran in and started
giving Bruce a shoulder rub.
Bruce Jenner declared he is a woman and a Republican. In
other words, the GOP finally found someone who might be
able to beat Hillary.
Many believe that Hillary Clinton was channeling
President Obama during her recent speech in New York
City. She focused on equality, justice, and how hard it
was for her growing up as a young black man in Hawaii.
Hillary Clinton wrote an Op-Ed for a paper in Iowa about
her plans to help the middle class. Middle-class
Americans said, “Why didn't you just say that in a
speech?” and she said, “Because I charge $200,000 for a
During a recent press conference, former President Jimmy
Carter said he could never run for president today
because he doesn’t have a lot of money. Well, that and
the fact that he's the famously bad president Jimmy
Blackberry is being criticized after it misspelled the
word “won” in an ad celebrating a design award. Instead
of w-o-n they put o-n-e. Blackberry apologized for the
spelling mistake and promised the person responsible has
The new Apple Watch officially launched today. There's a
new trend — people cutting actual apples and strapping
them to their wrists in celebration of the Apple Watch.
And if you shop at Whole Foods, it actually ends up
costing as much as the real thing.
story is Bruce Jenner. In last week's interview, Jenner
said he's a woman who is transitioning his body from
male to female, and he's also a conservative Republican.
Bruce said he looks forward to bashing Obamacare as soon
as he finishes using it.
The NBA playoffs are underway. Or as the Lakers call it,
time to golf.
A U.N. study claims the happiest country in the world is
Switzerland. When asked why they're so happy, Swiss
people couldn't answer because their hands were counting
money and their mouths were full of chocolate.
Due to civil unrest in Baltimore, tomorrow's game
between the Orioles and the White Sox will be played to
an empty stadium. When asked for comments, players on
the Milwaukee Brewers said, "You get used to it."
A new study reveals that one-third of babies in the U.S.
have used a smartphone. Yeah, and one-third of babies in
China have MADE a smartphone.
Prince William's pregnant wife, Kate Middleton, is past
her due date. Doctors may have to induce labor. To speed
up the birth, doctors have been telling the baby, "Come
on out. You will never have to work a day in your life."
Bruce Jenner will be getting his own reality show.
Unfortunately, as a woman Jenner will be making only 70
percent of what he made on his last reality show.
Earth Day. The way I see it, as humans the very least we
can do is recycle. A lot of recycling is going on this
year. For example, Bushes and Clintons.
New Yorkers, each one on average, create 15 pounds of
garbage every week. Of course, that goes up if you're
disposing of a body.
Recently a guy was having trouble with his computer. So
he unplugs it, takes it out in the alley, pulls out a
gun, and shoots it eight times. Coincidentally, that's
how Hillary got rid of her emails.
Jeb Bush has to distance himself from what they call the
Bush brand. So he keeps saying, "I am my own man." But
when Governor Chris Christie is out on the campaign
trail, he's always saying, "I'm my own man, plus another
Baseball slugger Barry Bonds has been cleared of all
charges. He was involved in performance-enhancing drugs.
The guy tested positive for more things than a pint of
Blue Bell ice cream.
At the White House, they caught another fence jumper
earlier today. It was Obama trying to get out.
The White House should just get one of those doormats
that reads "Go away!" That's what they need to stop the
Mayor de Blasio wants to eliminate garbage. He believes
New York City produces way too much garbage. Well, heck,
forget about producing too much garbage. What about
late-night talk shows?
Anybody go to the Olive Garden? They offer a hot meal at
a fair price, which is all I'm ever looking for. Every
table at the Olive Garden now has a computer. It's the
perfect way for a family of four to ignore one another.
And while you're there on the Olive Garden computer, you
can get on the Internet and look up a better restaurant.
They're talking about putting a woman on the $20 bill.
And Hillary said, "I'm available."
Hillary is just a regular person, just like you and me.
Her assistant puts on Hillary's pants one leg at a time.
I have only a few weeks left here on the show. So I was
thinking that I had better hurry up and use my sick
Mayor de Blasio said that whenever he goes to a Yankee
game he gets sick and tired of people booing and giving
him the finger. Hey, what do you want? You're the mayor
of New York City. It comes with the gig, pal.
Donald Trump may be running for president. He said he is
sick and tired of the rest of the world laughing at the
United States. Well, President Trump will certainly put
an end to that.
To save energy, New York City is now dimming the lights
of the skyscrapers and the skyline at night. There's a
bad side to this. If you need Batman, you have to text
The Tony Awards were announced. Nominees included "You
Can't Take It With You," "The King and I," and "On the
Town." I'm telling you, it's been a great year for
Broadway. Unfortunately, the year is 1944.
Once again, "The Late Show" was nominated for a Tony
Award. Yes, in the category "Biggest waste of a Broadway
"Take Our Daughters and Sons to Work Day." Or as Woody
Allen calls it, "Take Your Wife to Work Day."
I did not take my children to work because my oldest is
4 years old, and frankly he is already far too mature to
be hanging around this office.
It's official. I genuinely cannot keep up with the
In an interview with Diane Sawyer, Bruce Jenner made it
known that he would like to be identified as a woman. I
was watching it with my wife, and she turned to me and
said that watching this had given her hope that one day
I might fully transition into becoming a man.
Nicki Minaj made a 13-year-old boy's dream come true
when she performed at his bar mitzvah over the weekend.
I'm a grown man with my own TV show and I can't get her
How many people were at that bar mitzvah — 300? Nicki,
we have almost double that watching this show right now.
Think about what this could do for your career.
Imagine being the kid at that school who's having the
next bar mitzvah. How do you compete with that? His
friends will say, "What, you're having a magician? He'd
better reach into his hat and pull out Beyoncé."
It is Earth
Day. I bet the Earth got so many messages.
The first Earth Day took place in 1970. At the rate we
are going, the last one should be soon.
Manny Pacquiao is on the show tonight. On May 7, Manny
faces Floyd Mayweather in one of the most anticipated
bouts ever. He is from the Philippines and a national
hero. I wonder if anyone in the Philippines is rooting
for Mayweather. Probably one jerk who nobody likes.
We also have Dr. Phil tonight. Dr. Phil once said that
no matter how flat you make a pancake, it's still got
two sides. So not only does Dr. Phil understand the
human condition, he understands breakfast too.
Today is Take Our Daughters and Sons to Work Day, also
known as No Work Gets Done Day. It is a great
opportunity to teach your kids why you come home
miserable every night.
I wonder if anyone has ever been fired on "take your kid
to work day." Just imagine, "Ron, will you and your
daughter step into my office please?" That would be a
lesson about what it is like to work.
Everybody seems to think they're safe from earthquakes
if they don't live in California. According to the
Seismological Society of America, half of Americans are
threatened by earthquakes. We just celebrated Earth Day
and now it wants to kill us.
If you have never been through an earthquake, I think
the worst thing is not that it is happening. It's that
when it starts you don't know how long it will go or how
bad it will be. It's like a celebrity marriage.
I watched Diane Sawyer's interview with Bruce Jenner on
Friday night. I think he came off very well. He went
from being a boring man to a very charming woman. We
might have found our next "Bachelorette."
The most shocking part of the interview for me was when
Bruce Jenner said there was only one full-length mirror
in the Kardashian house.
Jenner also identified himself as a conservative
Republican. He said he believes that John Boehner and
Mitch McConnell will support him and advocate for
transgender issues. Yeah, of course they will. They're
probably having the buttons printed as we speak.
It turns out after all of these years that instead of
the Kardashians we should have been keeping up with
Earth Day. So this year I’m finally gonna do it. I’m
gonna find out what the blue trash cans are for.
The city of San Francisco announced that on January 1
tobacco of any kind will be illegal. So you’ll finally
be able to say to a police officer, “No, no, this is
Arnold Schwarzenegger has a new movie that focuses on a
zombie apocalypse. It takes place in an empty wasteland
with no living beings. Just like the movie theater where
Doctors in India have removed 140 coins, 150 needles,
and several nuts, bolts, and batteries from the stomach
of a man suffering from abdominal pain. Someone should
give that guy a medal. Actually, you know what? Don't
give him a medal.
Students at a Catholic girls school in England are
reportedly being taught that sex outside of marriage can
destroy your soul and make your body sick. While sex
inside of marriage just destroys your soul.
Chinese scientists have edited the DNA of human embryos
for the first time, sparking concerns that it could lead
to designer children. So, now even people are made in
Dr. Oz defended himself from critics last week by saying
that his television program is not a medical show. It’s
just that he didn’t think anyone would watch a show
called “Mr. Oz.”
There’s a new dating app that pairs attractive females
with generous males who will fly them to foreign
countries for first dates. If you’d like to know more,
tune in to next week’s "Dateline."
A new survey has found that people in Ireland tell an
average of four white lies per day. And three of them
are, “I’m fine to drive home.”
Hillary Clinton has temporarily changed her campaign
logo to rainbow colors in support of marriage equality.
Of course, her idea of marriage equality is both of you
should get to be president.
While covering the earthquake in Nepal this week, CNN
correspondent Sanjay Gupta helped medical personnel
perform brain surgery. Gupta said he was excited to work
with brains again after being at CNN for so long.
Scientists have discovered that Tyrannosaurus Rex may
have had a vegetarian cousin. Man, it must suck to have
a vegetarian in the family when your arms are too short
to cover your ears.
Starbucks has a new S'mores Frappuccino, which became
available today. It's perfect for those people looking
to gain s'more weight.
WEEKLY SNOPES URBAN LEGEND UPDATE
HERE for the most current update.
• • • • •
Do you believe in magic? Simon Cowell of Britain’s Got
Talent says he didn’t until 31-year-old Jamie Raven
performed this trick on the show. It’s hard to believe
that Cowell would risk his reputation by being a shill
for the magician. Assuming he wasn’t, how can anyone
THIS trick was done? (6:22)
• • • • •
When it comes to cards, what this kid can do with a deck
is nothing short of
AMAZING. Are they trick cards? You be the judge.
• • • • •
Benny Hill may be long gone, but his style of humor is
still finding a big audience in the UK. Check out
THIS short clip from the Scottish Comedy Channel.
• • • • •
Here’s a clever 'Just for Laughs Gag' about some
RIDERS who were unaware that they won a race. (2:00)
• • • • •
It’s one thing to work for the
DMV and administer written tests, quite another to
give driving tests, especially to the elderly. (1:14)
• • • • •
OK, I admit it. I often laugh at stupid jokes like
THIS one that was made into a video clip eight years
ago. And to me, it’s just as funny today as it was back
in 2007 when it was first uploaded to YouTube. (0:48)
• • • • •
Dutch filmmaker Frans Hofmeester has recorded his
daughter Lotte every week since she was born in 1999 and
edited the footage together to show her growing up in
THIS video. (4:06)
• • • • •
A grieving baby elephant gets a helping hand from the
staff of the Shamwari Game reserve in South Africa. The
team uses a sheep to bond with the little one after
taking it from the herd. The friendship is rocky at
first, but the end
RESULT is amazing. (4:38)
full 52-minute documentary, click
• • • • •
single and she’s gorgeous and she lives right across the
see her place from my front window.
watched as she got home from work this evening.
surprised when she walked straight across the street, up
my driveway and knocked on the door.
to open it.
looked me in the eye and said, ”I just got home and I
have this strong urge to have a good time, get a little
tipsy and party tonight! Are you doing anything?"
quickly replied, "Nope, I'm free!"
she said. “Could you watch my dog?”
senior citizen really sucks.
(Received from Stan Miller)
• • • • •
graphic example of what karma looks like? Watch what
THIS kid with the backpack who gives a monkey the
• • • • •
The Grand Prairie Police Motorcycle Rodeo is an annual
event held in Texas every year to benefit the Special
Olympics. It features some of the most skilled
RIDERS in the state, including Officer Donnie
Williams of the McKinney, Texas PD. (2:22)
• • • • •
help but wonder why
THIS fifth wheel vacation trailer for owners of the
VW Bug and other compact cars in the mid 1970s never
caught on. (1:29)
• • • •
Would you travel to another galaxy with
THIS guy at the helm of your starship? (1:24)
• • • •
Meet Evnika Saadvakass, who is quite possibly the
world's most terrifying 7-year-old. Two years ago, she
became a YouTube sensation when her father, Rustam,
VIDEO showing her impressive punching speed —
roughly 100 shots in two minutes. That video quickly
gained over 3 million views, and now Evnika is back to
show the progress that she has made. One look at those
tiny, lightning-fast fists of fury and you definitely
know this girl's never losing her lunch money to anyone.
• • • • •
“No, go ahead, we don’t need to play through.” Momma
bear and her two babies decided to stake out this green
at a golf course at the Fairmont Hot Springs Resort in
BC. After one of the not-so-little critters has fun with
WATCH what it does with the golf ball on the right
side of the screen. (2:14)
• • • • •
Speaking of golf, you should find this clip of the Bryan
Brothers entertaining even if you don’t play the game.
And if you do, you should find it amazing.
THIS is not your typical trick shots golf video.
takes place on the driving range and is just as amazing
as Part 1. Have a
• • • • •
According to Bruce Fair, it will soon be compulsory for
the elderly to not only carry their I.D. with them, but
also their insurance and Medicare papers, their list of
medication, a compact version of their medical history,
their preference about resuscitation after cardiac
arrest, etc. Rather than hand-carry all this paperwork,
it is anticipated that many seniors will opt to download
all of the info (or have it done) to the compact USB
flashdrive below, which will soon be available by
• • • • •
This video titled “Most Shocking Events Caught On
Dashcam” is making the rounds and may be worth a
LOOK if you're into this sort of thing. (2:29)
• • • • •
after her husband disappeared in a kayaking accident, a
woman in Booth Bay Harbor, Maine answered her door to
find two grim-faced Maine State Troopers.
"We're sorry Mrs. Wilkens, but we have some information
about your husband,” said one of the troopers.
"Tell me. Did you find him?” she asked.
The troopers looked at each other, then one said, ”We
have some bad news, some good news, and some really
great news. Which would you like to hear first?"
Fearing the worst, Mrs. Wilkens said, "Give me the bad
The trooper said, "I'm sorry to tell you, ma’am, but
this morning we found your husband’s body in the bay."
"Oh my God!" exclaimed the wife. Swallowing hard, she
asked, "What could possibly be the good news?"
The trooper continued, "When we pulled him up he had 12
of the best looking Maine Lobsters that you have ever
seen and 60 good-sized Rockfish clinging to him. We
haven't seen lobsters like that since the 1960s, and we
feel you are entitled to a share of the catch."
Stunned, Mrs. Wilkens demanded, "If that's the good
news, then what's the great news?"
The trooper replied, "We're gonna pull him up again
(Received from Dirk Parsons)
• • • • •
When we receive a video that originated in Russia, the
odds are good that it came from Bob Kosovilka. Such was
the case of
THIS clip of some kind motorists who were driving in
the Chernobyl exclusion zone when they decided to stop
and feed a hungry critter who was smart enough to make a
multi-layer sandwich out of the handouts before trotting
off into the woods to enjoy its meal. (1:36)
• • • • •
There are landslides, then there are
LANDSLIDES. A video has recently emerged showing a
landslide (or earthflow) that is making its way across
the land in Russia. One author compared the visual to a
slow moving tsunami made of rocks, snow and mud. Upon
the video's initial release, the only information that
could be found regarding the incident came from the
American Geophysical Union's Landslide Blog. It stated
that the flow began on April 1 and that it occurred in
Zarechny, which is located in Western Russia. (4:09)
course, could match the landslide caused by the
ERUPTION of Mount St. Helens in 1980. (2:30)
• • • • •
help out our Webmaster's friend?
reaching out on behalf of a friend who needs some help,
but who wishes to remain anonymous.
The friend's wife told him to go out and get some of
those pills that would help him get an erection. When he
came back he handed her a bottle of diet pills.
He is now looking for a place to live, and Leroy wants
to know if you can help?
• • • • •
Want to meet one of the Budweiser
CLYDESDALE babies? Of course you do because everyone
loves the famous Clydesdales. (3:14)
P.S. If you are a fan of the Clydesdales, we suggest you
HERE and watch a compilation of ten commercials
featuring the famous Budweiser horses. (7:51)
• • • • •
thought of having a penguin as a pet?
THIS video from "Real TV" shows one family in Japan
that has taken in a penguin as their pet. This King
Penguin is even given a small backpack for when he makes
a trip into town. (2:24)
• • • •
If a reminder is needed to be careful of what you do
when in public because you never know if you are being
recorded on video,
THIS clip received from Bob Tenbrink should serve as
an example. (1:10)
• • • • •
We chose this clip of a miracle baby to close this
week’s Farsider because it is one of the most amazing
videos we have seen in a long while. It shows the
RESCUE of a little girl named Gina who was
completely buried after an air strike in Syria turned
her home into rubble. (1:52)
THIS clip the baby’s father speaks of his relief.
• • • • •
Pic of the Week
Received from Larry Otter
bin Laden had been living with three wives in
compound for five years and never once left the
residence. The CIA has now released a report that
bin Laden called the Navy SEALs himself.
THE FARSIDER SUBSCRIPTION ROSTER as of 4/30/15
Additions and changes since the last published update
(alphabetical by last name):
Owen Purser — Address change
To receive the email address of anyone on the list -- or
to receive the roster with all of the email addresses --
send your request to
Abram, Fred & Connie
Alvarez, Pat (Campbell)
Babineau, Dave & Cheryl
Bray, Mary Ellen
Brown Jr., Bill
Burroughs, (Bronson) Utta
Carr Jr., John
Carrillo, Jaci Cordes
Clark, Bill (the one who stayed)
Embry (Howsmon), Eva
Foulkes [Duchon], Louise
Gonzalez, D. (formerly D. Avila)
Guido, Jr., Jim
Guido, Sr. Jim
Hare, Caren (Carlisle)
Harnish, Mary (Craven)
Horton, Debbie (McIntyre)
Howsmon (Sr.), Frank
Inami, Steve & Francine
Johnson, Tom & Fran
Klein, Lou Anna
Leonard (Lintern), Lynda
Long (Huntwork), Eunice
Muldrow, Mark "Mo"
O'Carroll, Diane (Azzarello)
Perry (Cervantez), Martha
Rappe (Ryman), Bonnie
Reyes (Buell), Cindy
Richter, Darrell & Annette
Schenini (Alvarez), Joanne
Taves, Phil & Paula
Terry, Glenn & Maggie
Vallecilla, Ernie & Peggy
Van Dyck, Lois
Williams [Durham], Lanette
Windisch Jr., Steve